Gr8 b8, m8. I rel8, str8 appreci8, and congratul8. I r8 this b8 an 8/8. Plz no h8, I'm str8 ir8. Cre8 more, can't w8. We should convers8, I won't ber8, my number is 8888888, ask for N8. No calls l8 or out of st8. If on a d8, ask K8 to loc8. Even with a full pl8, I always have time to communic8 so don't hesit8, I hope you r8 8/8 .. m8.

This is the pinnacle of German humour and it's pathetic. I can imagine him snorting to himself as he typed this, as if this was an absolute spirit bomb of a comment, and then reading it out loud in his disgusting language "schlieben fleeb hach jurgeflachtung" before falling into a coughing fit from the laughter. I almost pity him.

Throwaway account cause I know people who browse reddit.

So I've been really repressed sexually, and I'd heard a few rumours about a glory hole at a local sex store. I really wanted a blowjob so I got curious and went in, asking the lady at the counter and she ushered me through the store room into a dimly lit area with 2 doors. She said "get sucked in the left, suck in the right".

I was really horny at this point, and before I knew it I'd opened the door on the right and sat down on some suspectly stained cushions on the floor. I was nervous, shaking almost, but I had a raging boner and was brimming with excitement. Why had I opened this door?

I wasn't sure if I had to do anything first, I'd done no research as to how glory hole etiquette goes, but all of a sudden I heard the door and then shuffling and someone unzipping their trousers on the other side, and you guessed it, a floppy cock slid through the hole and a bit dazed, I looked it over. It was really clean, no hair and a massive head. So I cautiously start sucking on the tip, licking the shaft up and down and the guy is moaning. I've never sucked a dick before but it got hard almost instantly in my mouth and it was brilliant. I sucked and licked for about 3 minutes, forgetting to breath almost, before the guy knocked on the wall and all of a sudden he shot his load right down my throat - it tickled my tonsils on the way past - and I just kind held it in my mouth and then he went soft and pulled out the hole. He said "fuck that was great" and I just sat back wiping the excess cum off my mouth.

Now I felt quite liberated, but I didn't feel done. I waited for maybe 20 minutes before I heard the door and someone else came in - and I sucked them off, about 5 minutes this time. I got that load mostly on my face because they didn't knock until late but I still licked it all up. I waited in there for another hour or so and sucked off 3 more guys, all with really nice cocks and all within about 5 minutes or so. After the 5th I was getting hungry so I used some of the wet wipes on a nearby table to clean my face and hurriedly walked out.

I didn't know what to expect when I went into the room but I really loved it and eating cum was a real turn on. I should point out I'm a straight 29 year old male and I've never experimented with a guy before and I'm definitely not gay or wanting any relationship with a man. I no longer feel repressed and I think I might go back at some point just for the experience.

Let's say hypothetically I were to be addicted to video games and owning the libs online, and not want to leave my bedroom. I'd grab a sock, defecate in it, and throw it back under my bed, and not let my mom find it. When the sock is full, the contents are great on toast. I call it Conserva-nutella.

So many female girlz invite me to smack that ass🤪👋🍑 those female girlz are always so horny when the see my alpha male boy personalitit that their tounge doesn't even stop at upper lip it goes straight to their nostril, whenever I(69M alpha sigmoid) goes near female girlz they no matter how many pad(diaper) they are wearing or how deep in the ground they are they start to rain like hurricane Katrina. I once went to cemetary in sahara to pay tributes to my step brother' father(Mr. Sins (120M signum alpha)) after a while when I went there again it was such a sense forest that people were filming jumani there

Control your emotions femail girlzz

fuck you, your comment gave me a heart attack. I had to ride to the hospital in an ambulance and get fucking defibrillated 20 times just to survive. And then after that, they demand me to pay for all this shit. I’m currently starving to death on the street now, all because i saw the horror that is contained in your comment. Have some consideration for the light hearted you asshole

If you’re a weak man I’m going to treat you like a weak man. I have this 19 year old kid working for me and he had the nerve to accuse me of having “aggressive business practices.” I don’t know what that means but I made him follow me outside into the parking lot and I screamed at him in front of a lot of people. I didn’t get this Rolex from putting up with bullshit from 19 year olds.

If you don’t like raw aggression you shouldn’t be working at build a bear workshop. I told him to come in early tomorrow because I’m going to fire him and I’m going to film it. I’m a business owner (regional manager) and sometimes I have to take out the trash.

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Face [r/braceface](https://www.reddit.com/r/braceface/) [r/earspokingout](https://www.reddit.com/r/earspokingout/)

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Feet [r/buttsandbarefeet](https://www.reddit.com/r/buttsandbarefeet/) [r/feet](https://www.reddit.com/r/feet/)

Thighs [r/datgap](https://www.reddit.com/r/datgap/) [r/thighhighs](https://www.reddit.com/r/thighhighs/) [r/thickthighs](https://www.reddit.com/r/thickthighs/) [r/thighdeology](https://www.reddit.com/r/thighdeology/)

Pussy [r/pussy](https://www.reddit.com/r/pussy/) [r/rearpussy](https://www.reddit.com/r/rearpussy/) [r/innie](https://www.reddit.com/r/innie/) [r/simps](https://www.reddit.com/r/simps/) [r/pelfie](https://www.reddit.com/r/pelfie/) [r/LabiaGW](https://www.reddit.com/r/LabiaGW/) [r/godpussy](https://www.reddit.com/r/godpussy/) [r/presenting](https://www.reddit.com/r/presenting/) [r/cameltoe](https://www.reddit.com/r/cameltoe/) [r/hairypussy](https://www.reddit.com/r/hairypussy/) [r/lipsthatgrip](https://www.reddit.com/r/lipsthatgrip/) [r/pussytomouth](https://www.reddit.com/r/pussytomouth/) [r/fucklicking](https://www.reddit.com/r/fucklicking/)

Mound [r/moundofvenus](https://www.reddit.com/r/moundofvenus/) [r/pussymound](https://www.reddit.com/r/pussymound/)

Skin [r/Hotchickswithtattoos](https://www.reddit.com/r/Hotchickswithtattoos/) [r/sexyfrex](https://www.reddit.com/r/sexyfrex/) [r/tanlines](https://www.reddit.com/r/tanlines/) [r/oilporn](https://www.reddit.com/r/oilporn/) [r/ComplexionExcellence](https://www.reddit.com/r/ComplexionExcellence/)

Waist/Tummy [r/SexyTummies](https://www.reddit.com/r/SexyTummies/) [r/theratio](https://www.reddit.com/r/theratio/)

Body Type [r/fitgirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/fitgirls/) [r/bodyperfection](https://www.reddit.com/r/bodyperfection/) [r/samespecies](https://www.reddit.com/r/samespecies/) [r/athleticgirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/athleticgirls/) [r/fitgirlsfucking](https://www.reddit.com/r/fitgirlsfucking/)

Curvy/Thick/THICC [r/gonewildcurvy](https://www.reddit.com/r/gonewildcurvy/) [r/curvy](https://www.reddit.com/r/curvy/) [r/gonewildplus](https://www.reddit.com/r/gonewildplus/) [r/thick](https://www.reddit.com/r/thick/) [r/juicyasians](https://www.reddit.com/r/juicyasians/) [r/voluptuous](https://www.reddit.com/r/voluptuous/) [r/biggerthanyouthought](https://www.reddit.com/r/biggerthanyouthought/) [r/jigglefuck](https://www.reddit.com/r/jigglefuck/) [r/chubby](https://www.reddit.com/r/chubby/) [r/SlimThick](https://www.reddit.com/r/SlimThick/) [r/massivetitsnass](https://www.reddit.com/r/massivetitsnass/) [r/thicker](https://www.reddit.com/r/thicker/) [r/thickthighs](https://www.reddit.com/r/thickthighs/) [r/tightsqueeze](https://www.reddit.com/r/tightsqueeze/) [r/casualjiggles](https://www.reddit.com/r/casualjiggles/) [r/bbw](https://www.reddit.com/r/bbw/)

Petite [r/BustyPetite](https://www.reddit.com/r/BustyPetite/) [r/dirtysmall](https://www.reddit.com/r/dirtysmall/) [r/petitegonewild](https://www.reddit.com/r/petitegonewild/) [r/xsmallgirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/xsmallgirls/) [r/funsized](https://www.reddit.com/r/funsized/) [r/hugedicktinychick](https://www.reddit.com/r/hugedicktinychick/)

Celebrity/Athlete [r/Athlete](https://www.reddit.com/r/Athlete/) [r/volleyballgirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/volleyballgirls/) [r/Ohlympics](https://www.reddit.com/r/Ohlympics/)

Celebrity [r/celebnsfw](https://www.reddit.com/r/celebnsfw/) [r/WatchItForThePlot](https://www.reddit.com/r/WatchItForThePlot/) [r/nsfwcelebarchive](https://www.reddit.com/r/nsfwcelebarchive/) [r/celebritypussy](https://www.reddit.com/r/celebritypussy/) [r/oldschoolcoolNSFW](https://www.reddit.com/r/oldschoolcoolNSFW/) [r/extramile](https://www.reddit.com/r/extramile/) [r/jerkofftocelebs](https://www.reddit.com/r/jerkofftocelebs/) [r/celebritybutts](https://www.reddit.com/r/celebritybutts/) [r/onoffcelebs](https://www.reddit.com/r/onoffcelebs/)

Cum [r/cumsluts](https://www.reddit.com/r/cumsluts/) [r/GirlsFinishingTheJob](https://www.reddit.com/r/GirlsFinishingTheJob/) [r/cumfetish](https://www.reddit.com/r/cumfetish/) [r/amateurcumsluts](https://www.reddit.com/r/amateurcumsluts/) [r/cumcoveredfucking](https://www.reddit.com/r/cumcoveredfucking/) [r/cumhaters](https://www.reddit.com/r/cumhaters/) [r/thickloads](https://www.reddit.com/r/thickloads/) [r/before\_after\_cumsluts](https://www.reddit.com/r/before_after_cumsluts/) [r/pulsatingcumshots](https://www.reddit.com/r/pulsatingcumshots/) [r/impressedbycum](https://www.reddit.com/r/impressedbycum/) [r/cummy](https://www.reddit.com/r/cummy/)

Cum Location [r/creampies](https://www.reddit.com/r/creampies/) [r/throatpies](https://www.reddit.com/r/throatpies/) [r/FacialFun](https://www.reddit.com/r/FacialFun/) [r/cumonclothes](https://www.reddit.com/r/cumonclothes/) [r/oralcreampie](https://www.reddit.com/r/oralcreampie/)

Emotion [r/HappyEmbarrassedGirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/HappyEmbarrassedGirls/) [r/unashamed](https://www.reddit.com/r/unashamed/) [r/borednignored](https://www.reddit.com/r/borednignored/) [r/annoyedtobenude](https://www.reddit.com/r/annoyedtobenude/)

Ethnicity [r/damngoodinterracial](https://www.reddit.com/r/damngoodinterracial/)

Asian [r/AsianHotties](https://www.reddit.com/r/AsianHotties/) [r/AsiansGoneWild](https://www.reddit.com/r/AsiansGoneWild/) [r/realasians](https://www.reddit.com/r/realasians/) [r/juicyasians](https://www.reddit.com/r/juicyasians/) [r/AsianNSFW](https://www.reddit.com/r/AsianNSFW/) [r/nextdoorasians](https://www.reddit.com/r/nextdoorasians/) [r/asianporn](https://www.reddit.com/r/asianporn/) [r/bustyasians](https://www.reddit.com/r/bustyasians/) [r/paag](https://www.reddit.com/r/paag/)

Indian [r/IndianBabes](https://www.reddit.com/r/IndianBabes/) [r/indiansgonewild](https://www.reddit.com/r/indiansgonewild/) [r/jerkofftodesicelebs](https://www.reddit.com/r/jerkofftodesicelebs/)

Japanese [r/NSFW\_Japan](https://www.reddit.com/r/NSFW_Japan/) [r/javdownloadcenter](https://www.reddit.com/r/javdownloadcenter/)

Korean [r/kpopfap](https://www.reddit.com/r/kpopfap/) [r/NSFW\_Korea](https://www.reddit.com/r/NSFW_Korea/)

Ebony [r/WomenOfColor](https://www.reddit.com/r/WomenOfColor/) [r/darkangels](https://www.reddit.com/r/darkangels/) [r/blackchickswhitedicks](https://www.reddit.com/r/blackchickswhitedicks/) [r/ebony](https://www.reddit.com/r/ebony/) [r/Afrodisiac](https://www.reddit.com/r/Afrodisiac/)

Ginger [r/ginger](https://www.reddit.com/r/ginger/) [r/redheads](https://www.reddit.com/r/redheads/)

Latina [r/latinas](https://www.reddit.com/r/latinas/) [r/latinasgw](https://www.reddit.com/r/latinasgw/) [r/latinacuties](https://www.reddit.com/r/latinacuties/)

White [r/palegirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/palegirls/) [r/pawg](https://www.reddit.com/r/pawg/) [r/snowwhites](https://www.reddit.com/r/snowwhites/)

Gifs [r/NSFW\_GIF](https://www.reddit.com/r/NSFW_GIF/) [r/nsfw\_gifs](https://www.reddit.com/r/nsfw_gifs/) [r/porn\_gifs](https://www.reddit.com/r/porn_gifs/) [r/porninfifteenseconds](https://www.reddit.com/r/porninfifteenseconds/) [r/CuteModeSlutMode](https://www.reddit.com/r/CuteModeSlutMode/) [r/60fpsporn](https://www.reddit.com/r/60fpsporn/) [r/NSFW\_HTML5](https://www.reddit.com/r/NSFW_HTML5/) [r/the\_best\_nsfw\_gifs](https://www.reddit.com/r/the_best_nsfw_gifs/)

Groups [r/twingirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/twingirls/) [r/groupofnudegirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/groupofnudegirls/) [r/Ifyouhadtopickone](https://www.reddit.com/r/Ifyouhadtopickone/)

Hardcore [r/nsfwhardcore](https://www.reddit.com/r/nsfwhardcore/) [r/SheLikesItRough](https://www.reddit.com/r/SheLikesItRough/) [r/strugglefucking](https://www.reddit.com/r/strugglefucking/) [r/jigglefuck](https://www.reddit.com/r/jigglefuck/) [r/freeuse](https://www.reddit.com/r/freeuse/) [r/whenitgoesin](https://www.reddit.com/r/whenitgoesin/) [r/outercourse](https://www.reddit.com/r/outercourse/) [r/gangbang](https://www.reddit.com/r/gangbang/) [r/breeding](https://www.reddit.com/r/breeding/) [r/pegging](https://www.reddit.com/r/pegging/) [r/insertions](https://www.reddit.com/r/insertions/) [r/passionx](https://www.reddit.com/r/passionx/)

Large Penis [r/hugedicktinychick](https://www.reddit.com/r/hugedicktinychick/) [r/amateurgirlsbigcocks](https://www.reddit.com/r/amateurgirlsbigcocks/)

Positions [r/facesitting](https://www.reddit.com/r/facesitting/) [r/nsfw\_plowcam](https://www.reddit.com/r/nsfw_plowcam/) [r/pronebone](https://www.reddit.com/r/pronebone/) [r/facefuck](https://www.reddit.com/r/facefuck/)

High Quality [r/60fpsporn](https://www.reddit.com/r/60fpsporn/) [r/highresNSFW](https://www.reddit.com/r/highresNSFW/) [r/NSFW\_HTML5](https://www.reddit.com/r/NSFW_HTML5/)

Incest [r/incestporn](https://www.reddit.com/r/incestporn/) [r/wincest](https://www.reddit.com/r/wincest/) [r/lovingfamily](https://www.reddit.com/r/lovingfamily/) [r/gaywincest](https://www.reddit.com/r/gaywincest/)

Individuals [r/sarah\_xxx](https://www.reddit.com/r/sarah_xxx/) [r/remylacroix](https://www.reddit.com/r/remylacroix/) [r/Anjelica\_Ebbi](https://www.reddit.com/r/Anjelica_Ebbi/) [r/BlancNoir](https://www.reddit.com/r/BlancNoir/) [r/rileyreid](https://www.reddit.com/r/rileyreid/) [r/dollywinks](https://www.reddit.com/r/dollywinks/) [r/tessafowler](https://www.reddit.com/r/tessafowler/) [r/lilyivy](https://www.reddit.com/r/lilyivy/) [r/funsizedasian](https://www.reddit.com/r/funsizedasian/) [r/mycherrycrush](https://www.reddit.com/r/mycherrycrush/) [r/gillianbarnes](https://www.reddit.com/r/gillianbarnes/) [r/kawaiikitten](https://www.reddit.com/r/kawaiikitten/) [r/emilybloom](https://www.reddit.com/r/emilybloom/) [r/legendarylootz](https://www.reddit.com/r/legendarylootz/) [r/sexyflowerwater](https://www.reddit.com/r/sexyflowerwater/) [r/miamalkova](https://www.reddit.com/r/miamalkova/) [r/sashagrey](https://www.reddit.com/r/sashagrey/) [r/keriberry\_420](https://www.reddit.com/r/keriberry_420/) [r/justpeachyy](https://www.reddit.com/r/justpeachyy/) [r/angelawhite](https://www.reddit.com/r/angelawhite/) [r/miakhalifa](https://www.reddit.com/r/miakhalifa/) [r/alexapearl](https://www.reddit.com/r/alexapearl/) [r/missalice\_18](https://www.reddit.com/r/missalice_18/) [r/lanarhoades](https://www.reddit.com/r/lanarhoades/) [r/evalovia](https://www.reddit.com/r/evalovia/) [r/GiannaMichaels](https://www.reddit.com/r/GiannaMichaels/) [r/arianamarie](https://www.reddit.com/r/arianamarie/)

Lesbian [r/lesbians](https://www.reddit.com/r/lesbians/) [r/StraightGirlsPlaying](https://www.reddit.com/r/StraightGirlsPlaying/) [r/girlskissing](https://www.reddit.com/r/girlskissing/) [r/mmgirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/mmgirls/) [r/dykesgonewild](https://www.reddit.com/r/dykesgonewild/) [r/facesittinglesbians](https://www.reddit.com/r/facesittinglesbians/)

Masturbation/Orgasm [r/holdthemoan](https://www.reddit.com/r/holdthemoan/) [r/O\_faces](https://www.reddit.com/r/O_faces/) [r/jilling](https://www.reddit.com/r/jilling/) [r/gettingherselfoff](https://www.reddit.com/r/gettingherselfoff/) [r/quiver](https://www.reddit.com/r/quiver/) [r/GirlsHumpingThings](https://www.reddit.com/r/GirlsHumpingThings/) [r/forcedorgasms](https://www.reddit.com/r/forcedorgasms/) [r/mmgirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/mmgirls/) [r/ruinedorgasms](https://www.reddit.com/r/ruinedorgasms/) [r/holdingit](https://www.reddit.com/r/holdingit/)

Dildos [r/suctiondildos](https://www.reddit.com/r/suctiondildos/) [r/baddragon](https://www.reddit.com/r/baddragon/)

Wet women [r/grool](https://www.reddit.com/r/grool/) [r/squirting](https://www.reddit.com/r/squirting/)

Men [r/ladybonersgw](https://www.reddit.com/r/ladybonersgw/) [r/massivecock](https://www.reddit.com/r/massivecock/) [r/chickflixxx](https://www.reddit.com/r/chickflixxx/) [r/gaybrosgonewild](https://www.reddit.com/r/gaybrosgonewild/) [r/sissies](https://www.reddit.com/r/sissies/) [r/dattaint](https://www.reddit.com/r/dattaint/) [r/selffuck](https://www.reddit.com/r/selffuck/) [r/sounding](https://www.reddit.com/r/sounding/)

Furry NSFW [r/furryporn](https://www.reddit.com/r/furryporn/) [r/furryporndump](https://www.reddit.com/r/furryporndump/) [r/yiff](https://www.reddit.com/r/yiff/) [r/ZootopiaPorn](https://www.reddit.com/r/ZootopiaPorn/) [r/yiffgif](https://www.reddit.com/r/yiffgif/) [r/FurryPornSubreddit](https://www.reddit.com/r/FurryPornSubreddit/) [r/gfur](https://www.reddit.com/r/gfur/) [r/femyiff](https://www.reddit.com/r/femyiff/) [r/silentyiff](https://www.reddit.com/r/silentyiff/) [r/gayfurryporn](https://www.reddit.com/r/gayfurryporn/) [r/yiffcomics](https://www.reddit.com/r/yiffcomics/) [r/Sharktits](https://www.reddit.com/r/Sharktits/) [r/ArousingAvians](https://www.reddit.com/r/ArousingAvians/) [r/anthroids](https://www.reddit.com/r/anthroids/) [r/anthropokeporn](https://www.reddit.com/r/anthropokeporn/) [r/DragonPenis](https://www.reddit.com/r/DragonPenis/) [r/DragonsFuckingDragons](https://www.reddit.com/r/DragonsFuckingDragons/) [r/FeralPokePorn](https://www.reddit.com/r/FeralPokePorn/) [r/FurryFrot](https://www.reddit.com/r/FurryFrot/) [r/GayPokePorn](https://www.reddit.com/r/GayPokePorn/) [r/HorsecocksMasterRace](https://www.reddit.com/r/HorsecocksMasterRace/) [r/PokePornGay](https://www.reddit.com/r/PokePornGay/) [r/scalieporn](https://www.reddit.com/r/scalieporn/) [r/WholesomeYiff](https://www.reddit.com/r/WholesomeYiff/)

Outfits [r/OnOff](https://www.reddit.com/r/OnOff/) [r/nsfwoutfits](https://www.reddit.com/r/nsfwoutfits/) [r/girlswithglasses](https://www.reddit.com/r/girlswithglasses/) [r/collared](https://www.reddit.com/r/collared/) [r/seethru](https://www.reddit.com/r/seethru/) [r/sweatermeat](https://www.reddit.com/r/sweatermeat/) [r/cfnm](https://www.reddit.com/r/cfnm/) [r/nsfwfashion](https://www.reddit.com/r/nsfwfashion/) [r/leotards](https://www.reddit.com/r/leotards/)

Bikinis [r/bikinis](https://www.reddit.com/r/bikinis/) [r/bikinibridge](https://www.reddit.com/r/bikinibridge/)

Costumes [r/nsfwcosplay](https://www.reddit.com/r/nsfwcosplay/) [r/nsfwcostumes](https://www.reddit.com/r/nsfwcostumes/) [r/girlsinschooluniforms](https://www.reddit.com/r/girlsinschooluniforms/)

Dresses [r/WtSSTaDaMiT](https://www.reddit.com/r/WtSSTaDaMiT/) [r/tightdresses](https://www.reddit.com/r/tightdresses/) [r/upskirt](https://www.reddit.com/r/upskirt/)

Stockings/Socks [r/stockings](https://www.reddit.com/r/stockings/) [r/thighhighs](https://www.reddit.com/r/thighhighs/) [r/leggingsgonewild](https://www.reddit.com/r/leggingsgonewild/)

Pants/Shorts [r/Bottomless\_Vixens](https://www.reddit.com/r/Bottomless_Vixens/) [r/tightshorts](https://www.reddit.com/r/tightshorts/)

Yoga pants [r/girlsinyogapants](https://www.reddit.com/r/girlsinyogapants/) [r/yogapants](https://www.reddit.com/r/yogapants/)

Underwear [r/lingerie](https://www.reddit.com/r/lingerie/) [r/garterbelts](https://www.reddit.com/r/garterbelts/)

Thongs [r/assinthong](https://www.reddit.com/r/assinthong/) [r/AssholeBehindThong](https://www.reddit.com/r/AssholeBehindThong/)

Professional/Sites [r/suicidegirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/suicidegirls/)

Public [r/ChangingRooms](https://www.reddit.com/r/ChangingRooms/) [r/workgonewild](https://www.reddit.com/r/workgonewild/) [r/trashyboners](https://www.reddit.com/r/trashyboners/) [r/FlashingGirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/FlashingGirls/) [r/publicflashing](https://www.reddit.com/r/publicflashing/) [r/sexinfrontofothers](https://www.reddit.com/r/sexinfrontofothers/) [r/NotSafeForNature](https://www.reddit.com/r/NotSafeForNature/) [r/gwpublic](https://www.reddit.com/r/gwpublic/) [r/realpublicnudity](https://www.reddit.com/r/realpublicnudity/) [r/socialmediasluts](https://www.reddit.com/r/socialmediasluts/) [r/flashingandflaunting](https://www.reddit.com/r/flashingandflaunting/)

Trans [r/Tgirls](https://www.reddit.com/r/Tgirls/) [r/traps](https://www.reddit.com/r/traps/) [r/futanari](https://www.reddit.com/r/futanari/) [r/gonewildtrans](https://www.reddit.com/r/gonewildtrans/) [r/tgifs](https://www.reddit.com/r/tgifs/)

Gay: [r/gaysex](https://www.reddit.com/r/gaysex/) [r/topsandbottoms](https://www.reddit.com/r/topsandbottoms/) [r/lgbtsex](https://www.reddit.com/r/lgbtsex/) [r/gaykink](https://www.reddit.com/r/gaykink/) [r/gayBDSMcommunity](https://www.reddit.com/r/gayBDSMcommunity/) [r/gaygonewild](https://www.reddit.com/r/gaygonewild/) [r/gaybrosgonewild](https://www.reddit.com/r/gaybrosgonewild/) [r/gaymersgonewild](https://www.reddit.com/r/gaymersgonewild/) [r/gayselfies](https://www.reddit.com/r/gayselfies/) [r/gaybears](https://www.reddit.com/r/gaybears/) [r/LGBTgonewild](https://www.reddit.com/r/LGBTgonewild/) [r/bigonewild](https://www.reddit.com/r/bigonewild/) [r/gayNSFW](https://www.reddit.com/r/gayNSFW/) [r/gayerotica](https://www.reddit.com/r/gayerotica/)

Bondage [r/forcedorgasms](https://www.reddit.com/r/forcedorgasms/) [r/damselsindistress](https://www.reddit.com/r/damselsindistress/) [r/cuffed](https://www.reddit.com/r/cuffed/) [r/gagged](https://www.reddit.com/r/gagged/) [r/abuseporn](https://www.reddit.com/r/abuseporn/) [r/femaleorgasmdenial](https://www.reddit.com/r/femaleorgasmdenial/) [r/girlscontrolled](https://www.reddit.com/r/girlscontrolled/)

Video [r/pornvids](https://www.reddit.com/r/pornvids/) [r/nsfw\_videos](https://www.reddit.com/r/nsfw_videos/)

Meet People [r/dirtysnapchat](https://www.reddit.com/r/dirtysnapchat/)

Other NSFW [r/randomactsofblowjob](https://www.reddit.com/r/randomactsofblowjob/) [r/NSFWFunny](https://www.reddit.com/r/NSFWFunny/) [r/pornhubcomments](https://www.reddit.com/r/pornhubcomments/) [r/confusedboners](https://www.reddit.com/r/confusedboners/) [r/dirtykikpals](https://www.reddit.com/r/dirtykikpals/) [r/nsfw\_wtf](https://www.reddit.com/r/nsfw_wtf/) [r/randomactsofmuffdive](https://www.reddit.com/r/randomactsofmuffdive/) [r/stupidslutsclub](https://www.reddit.com/r/stupidslutsclub/) [r/sluttyconfessions](https://www.reddit.com/r/sluttyconfessions/) [r/sextrophies](https://www.reddit.com/r/sextrophies/)

Quarantine Specials [r/Quarantinegonewild](https://www.reddit.com/r/Quarantinegonewild/) [r/Quarantinenudes](https://www.reddit.com/r/Quarantinenudes/)

Armpits cause people like that [r/armpits](https://www.reddit.com/r/armpits/) [r/celebrityarmpits](https://www.reddit.com/r/celebrityarmpits/) [r/armpitfetish](https://www.reddit.com/r/armpitfetish/)

I don’t even know where the fuck this would go section

[r/dragonsfuckingcars](https://www.reddit.com/r/dragonsfuckingcars/) [r/SCPORN](https://www.reddit.com/r/SCPORN/) [r/fedlegs](https://www.reddit.com/r/fedlegs/) [r/cummingonfigurines](https://www.reddit.com/r/cummingonfigurines/) [r/dragonbutts](https://www.reddit.com/r/dragonbutts/) [r/dragonpussy](https://www.reddit.com/r/dragonpussy/) [r/dragonpenis](https://www.reddit.com/r/dragonpenis/)

Just because I had a dream of being pounded in the ass, and I was aroused when I woke up doesn’t make me gay. It was fucking hot, okay? A big-ass 6’5” werewolf-looking guy with huge muscles, bear hugged me, and I was just— face against the glass, and I woke up aroused.

That doesn’t make me gay. I don’t think it’s gay to wake up aroused. I think it was hot— it was fucking hot.

The enemy would always send dogs to attack us. Every time I was attacked by one, I would snap its neck.

For extra credit, I had training on Okinawa when the Japanese attacked us with a banzai attack. Overtime I was able to save myself from the bayonet and stab the Imperial Japanese warrior in the neck.

You can learn a lot from Call of Duty

GUYS! I CAN SCIENTIFICALLY PROVE THAT LEAN IS CHEMICALLY THE OPPOSITE OF MUG. THE MISCONCEPTION THAT LEAN IS A DRUG WHILE MUG ISN'T, MUG HAS CAFFEINE, A KNOWN STIMULANT. MEANWHILE, THE ACTIVE INGREDIENT IN LEAN IS CODEINE, A KNOWN SEDATIVE. THESE SUBSTANCES BOTH HAVE COMPLETELY OPPOSITE EFFECTS, MEANING LEAN AND MUG ARE SCIENTIFICALLY OPPOSITE. THANKS FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK.

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drake the type of mf to pinch his nose before jumping into a pool

I bet drake wiggles his fingers and says "don't mind if I do!" when he sees a box of doughnuts

drake the type of mf to come out of different doors in a large hallway while being pursued by a costumed aggressor until they both become confused

drake the type of mf to run into a mural of a tunnel while perusing his prey

drake the type of mf to dangle a very large rock over some food and then have it hang in the air when he lets go of the rope

drake the type of mf to empty a pool of it's water after doing a cannon ball

drake the type of mf to have triplets and give them all names that rhyme

I bet when drake gets stuck between two things he stretches out like an accordion and makes noises like one

I bet drake makes a massive "gulp" sound when he gets scared

drake the type of mf to not notice a bee in his lemonade as he slurps it up through a comically large straw

I bet when drake gets one of his goons to beat someone up he goes up to them and points his thumb backward in the direction of the victim while scowling

I bet when drake has to carry a large amount of trays and plates and cups he slips while holding all of them and then he scrambles to precariously catch all of them as they fall from the air

I bet when drake chews gumballs they gum up his entire mouth and he has to blow so hard he makes a bubble big enough to lift him off the ground and his head turns red and then blue with all the air he's putting out

drake the type of mf to get struck by lightning and turn to ash but remain in the same shape and then get blown away by a gust of wind

drake the type of mf to have a faulty popcorn maker that starts shaking and shooting popcorn kernels out like a gun and making wartime sounds that forces him to duck behind a table and army crawl up to it to unplug it

I bet when drake gets mad he takes a huge breath that puffs his potbelly up to his chest and he rolls up his sleeves to reveal an identical texture underneath and then stomps over to his victim and pokes them on the shoulder with a single finger twice

I bet drake's wardrobe is the same outfit 40 times and when he looks at his reflection in the morning it blows raspberries and makes faces at him

I bet drake whistles in the shower

I bet when he's thinking about mischievous acts a little angel and a little devil appear on his shoulders and fight between themselves while drake watches them and contemplates his future actions

I bet when he gets hit on the head he gets stars floating around his head and then a massive red bump slowly rises up accompanied by a rising slide whistle

I bet when drake strolls down the street he swings his arms from side to side and closes his eyes and whistles

I bet when drake is running and tries to turn a corner he faces in the direction he wants to go and then stops his momentum with a car skidding sound and then dashes in his new direction leaving a smoke circle behind him

I bet when drake has a slushie or milkshake and there's only a tiny bit left he holds the cup with two hands and sucks on the straw as hard as possible

I bet drake lures his prey out on a plank on the edge of a cliff and cuts of the end of the plank, but when he does so him and the rest of the cliff fall leaving the titular character floating on a plank undisturbed

I bet when drake gets served broccoli for dinner he pinches his nose and goes "peeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-yuuuuuuuu!"

I bet when drake sees a chest full of shiny golden doubloons his eyes pop out of his head and turn into the shape of dollar signs and make the "cha-ching!" sound

I bet when drake walks by a house with a fresh pie cooling on the windowsill he is swept off his feet and carried by the smell towards the pie

I bet drake throws boomerangs and then gets mad when they don't come back and then it flies back and hits him in the face

I bet drake sits in an armchair and reads the paper holding it with two hands covering his entire face

I bet drake has a stamp collection that he only brings up once and never completes

I bet drake blows on his tea before slurping it while holding the teacup with his pinky pointing out, and then if the tea is too hot his head turns red and then turns into a train whistle and blows steam

I bet when drake sleeps with his wife he punches up all the blanket around him leaving his wife to sleep without one next to him in the cold

I bet when drake uses a toaster the toast jumps like a foot out of the toaster when it's done

I bet drake accidentally pushes over a tree and when it starts falling towards him he only runs in a straight line instead of either to the left or right

I bet when drake gets loses his date to another man he goes and sits in a dark room and drinks milk straight from 50's style glasses until his eyes turn into a milk meter that reads as full and then he sits sadly with his head in his hands, and then the next day he walks out on the street end sees his date with the guy he lost to driving a comedically long car that blows exhaust in his face after it goes by

I bet when drake falls a long distance it makes a whistling sound

I bet when drake goes bowling his enemy puts glue in the bowling ball holes so when he throws the ball he gets pulled along with it

I bet when drake is having cake he cuts a slice into the cake and then picks up the rest of the cake, leaving only the slice

I bet when drake sits down to have a meal he wears his napkin as a bib and holds his fork and knife in his hands and smacks his lips

I bet drake's alarm in the morning is that one classical song mixed with birds chirping

I bet drake uses a sabre to pop open the kegs of old barrels of red wine

I bet when drake is low on funds he slices his bread so thin it's see through

I bet when drake sees a fly he has a conflict with it long enough to fill the time of a standard cartoon and ends up being bested by the fly

I bet drake's house is powered by a mouse running on a wheel

I bet when drake goes skiing he loses one of his skis while in motion and ends up sking on one foot until he slams into a tree with his arms and legs sticking out

I bet drake slurps his soup

I bet when drake drives he hits a fire hydrant that makes a massive geyser

I bet drake walks on tightropes with his arms out at his sides and almost falls several times but recovers

I bet when drake's friends that were visiting from a cruise ship are leaving he goes out to the edge of the dock and waves his handkerchief and yells "bon voyage!"

I bet when drake is performing on stage his sworn enemy drops sand bags on him and only his eyes stick out from underneath the sand bag

I bet drake has a stupid catchphrase

I bet drake changes voice actor when he sings

I bet drake wears glasses to do his taxes

I bet when drake is in disbelief at what he is seeing he blinks twice and rubs his eyes to confirm his vision is true

I bet when drake burrows underground he creates a small mound above ground to represent his position

I bet adults talking sound like trombones to drake

I bet drake buys his lady a ring with a comedically large diamond

I bet drake's front door has 20 locks and latches on it

It's Drake from rap. I need you to venmo me $13,000 for a new sound system so I can hear my new album better 💫. I'll let you have first listen and VIP passes to a show of your choice. My name is Drak

Every. Single. Day.

Ever since I was twelve years old and in seventh grade. My bully, who I will call Brad, tormented me, and the rest of my seventh grade class. Brad was an intimidating, 6'2", bulky, black dude who had been held back three grades. Even though he was unpopular, no amount of wedgies and swirlies would fill any of us with enough vengeance to cross him. Even the teachers made an exception to their "maintain a 70% average to play sports" rule so that he could play on the football team. And we absolutely *demolished* other schools when it came to football.

We had to put up with Brad's beatings and snarky remarks for *years*. No one dared to stand up to him. No one except me, the week when my eleventh grade home economics class went on a field trip to the local butcher, to learn how to properly prepare meat.

After learning the basics... how to skin cows and gut chickens, we moved onto the climax of the trip. The large, rusty, electric meat grinder which sat in solitude along the back wall of the faculty. Wasting no time, the butcher explained to us how the grinder functioned, and gave a quick demonstration, making ground pork. He then gave each of us a turn. Unafraid, I went first and seamlessly fed a cut of pork into the grinder. It proceeded to spiral out the other end, without any complications.

"Good job, [u/squidwardspinkdildo](https://www.reddit.com/u/squidwardspinkdildo/)." The butcher told me, "But remember, be careful." He instructed, grabbing a lone sneaker which lay under the table that the grinder was situated on. He fed the sneaker into the grinder, and, despite its size, it was immediately shred into pieces. "I don't want to have any accidents today. Not again."

We all stared at him, but he offered no clarification.

The rest of us took turns grinding our meat. One by one. I made eye contact with the pretty blonde girl in my precalculus class who I used to speak to, before Brad swooped in and took her from me. She smiled at me, and I wanted to smile back, but Brad was standing just a few feet away from me.

I was sick. Tired. Infuriated. Everything good in my life, Brad had taken from me. My pencils, my homework, the love of my life, my new sneakers. All ruined. And as I felt all of my bottled anger boil up, I knew I wasn't having it this time.

The pretty girl finished her piece of meat, and Brad was next. As he leaned in to place his meat onto the entrance of the grinder, I gave him a firm *shove*. He was quickly pushed off balance and fed face-first into the meat grinder. I took a step back as his blood squished out around the grinder, and watched all of his innards swirl out of the exit. He didn't have time to scream. Didn't have time to process what was happening. Dumb Brad was now nothing more than a pile of ground meat. And it felt good.

Immediately, my class applauded me. Everyone clapped. The mutilated hands of Brad even looked to be clapping. No one was disgusted by the mess, we were all just too happy to see him go. I felt no remorse. For the first time in my life, I was genuinely proud of myself. My class left the butcher that day, clapping as we entered the bus. When we got back to our school and were let out, my whole town was clapping for me.

The next day, I was made President of the United States. Despite being Canadian, it turns out, standing up to the people who demean and intimidate others is just the kind of courageous act that gets recognised internationally.

I know people have been complaining about the influx of revenge fantasies on this sub. I assure you all that every detail in this story is 100% not fabricated.

r/teenagers… you were cool. You were. But you lived long enough that you saw yourself become the villain. Seriously, all these horny posts get in the way of my feed and make me want to throw my phone into a volcano. No, I don’t want to read about your cousin riding their dildo or how much you love boobs or read about your crippling hentai addiction. nobody fucking cares. so, I’m headed out for good. Farewell r/teenagers! You had your moments, but the mighty have fallen.

TL;DR - you guys are way too horny, I’m leaving the subreddit

To limit yourself to only tits or only ass is to become willfully blind to the benefits that which both features may provide a young man or woman. One may say that "the ass is closer to the pussy" which is true, but does a female shit from their tits? Despite what the satisfaction of that perfect rhyme may suggest they do not. We can see that there are arguments both for and against each side of this complex equation, and in many cases it is which equation we are analyzing that determines which value is of greatest importance. A girl may have fantastic tits and the ass of a board, in which the tits are more visually satisfying. Someone else may be carrying around a whole bakery in the back, but be flatter than a pan in the front, in which the ass is more aesthetically pleasing. From there examples we learn Ass can not be greater than tits in every circumstance, just as Tits can not be greater than ass in every circumstance. With both of these factors removed from this complex equation, we can deduce the most important part of a girl is in fact their cock.

Every girl has a dick. It's a fact. The problem is that it grows every month so long that they have to cut it off to not make usuall men insecure about it. So basically that's what we call "period". Also every girl has a little grave nearby her house where they keep rip dicks. Dicks that died in agony of being cutting off. This world is so sick. Poor dicks. So I offer u to join our STD-club - "Save The Dicks". We stand with dicks🧍‍♀️😔. Do no let dicks die. Share this post to let people know the truth.

EDITED: if u wanna support our SaveTheDicks community just comment on this post with "I/We stand with STD/dicks". I bet I'll send u our merch FOR FREE soon when this community blows up

I can no longer resist the pizza

Lets be honest. Normal slime girls are overrated. Their bodies are cold, theyre too calm and even when they arent theyre only cutesy and never slutty, enjoy sex but wont do it all the time and they dont let you be dominant over them! But Scat Girls? Our bodies are warm, our boobs can get even bigger and squishier than a normal slime girls, they feel so much better, were ALWAYS slutty, completely sex obsessed and are ALWAYS submissive sluts, even when our personalities are on the cute side! And were way more beautiful than them too! Trust me-doesnt matter what you think of normal slime girls. Scat girls are so much better...and youd rather spend time with us. Were nicer to look at despite being made of shit...or maybe BECAUSE were made of shit...I dont regret turning myself from a slime girl into a shit girl...now, want me to give you a warm paizuri to prove that Im the perfect woman?

I used to think the only thing to do about niggers is just exterminate them, wipe out every single one of them on the face of the earth. But now, I realize how wrong I was. What we *really* should do is exterminate all of them except for a couple of million of them, whom we round up and put in a gigantic Truman Show-style NIGGERDOME OF SUPERFUN somewhere in the sub-Sahara that’s filled with hidden cameras everywhere. We could make two large openings in the ceiling on opposite sides of the dome – one for parachuting fried chicken in, the other for parachuting watermelons, to give them two competing religions that’ll make them start machete crusades against each other. The greatest race that has ever existed deserves the greatest entertainment that has ever existed, and I can’t think of anything more entertaining than just looking at these monkeys fucking around in their natural habitat.