WARNING ⚠️ ⚠️ It seems 🤔 that you have 🤓 used a FORBIDDEN word 🔴 ❌ referring to sex 🔞 (SEX🤫 😱 ) we ask that this does NOT happen again! 🤐 🤚 Our server is FAMILY FRIENDLY 👪 👶 THANKS 🤩

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rygs7x

I want to fuck femboy Apandah so bad.

Holy fucking shit I wanna fuck femboy Apandah so bad. Whenever I see femboy Apandah or Apandah’s Vtuber model I start drooling like a fucking caveman on Xanax. God how much I want to penetrate all of femboy Apandah’s holes and plant my thick seed all across his gentle hot fucking body. How much I want to obliterate his delicate boy asshole with repeating thrusts until he pulls away squealing, a hot white trail emerging from his dirty little boyhole. How after I’m done using Apandah like a towel we’ll sit down on the couch and watch funny cats 3 on my TCL 55" Class 4-Series LED 4K UHD Smart Google TV and sip Fanta out of plastic bottles like we’ve been friends for years and I didn’t just bring him the closest he’s ever been to bearing witness to the light of god with my otherworldly sexual abilities. How Apandah’s eyes will roll to the back of his head as I explore places of his him that Ms Frizz’s magic school bus wouldn’t even dare to go. Oh how I long for the sensation of delving into the deep and lush jungle of his bussy, a forbidden fruit so ripe, a nectar so sweet and so delicious that neither Adam nor Eve would have a hope of resisting it. No snake required.

I’m not sure anything else can do it for me. I don’t indulge in regular pornography any more, I just watch Ugandan Knuckles 2 and bust whenever he says “do you know de wey” I’ve scourged the net for every single image of NSFW Apandah I can find. I changed the background images on all my school’s computer lab to the Femboy Apandah x Reader comic. I was suspended for 2 weeks and the principal labelled it a “tasteless and vulgar prank.” It was not a prank. It was exposing others to my religion. Just as Jehovah’s Witness does to your door I do to my school community. Is there a problem with that? It’s what keeps me ticking. Everyone looked at me weird and called me a freak after it. My friends don’t want to talk to me any more, they say I’m “Crazy” or “Too far gone” they don’t know the rush of finding a new NSFW apandah picture on the internet, or the arousal of seeing a new video he posted.

Femboy Apandah is my existence, my lifeblood. Without it I seize to exist. They say it’s not real, the Vtuber is just a model, Apandah is not a femboy in real life. They are liars. It’s real, it has to be, or else I am nothing, a withered husk of a human being.

I spent all of my free time getting the perfect doxxing algorithm, I now know Apandah’s address. I won’t reveal it in fear that the police will find me. I’ve scraped together enough money from stealing catalytic converters and working part time at Wendy’s to buy a plane ticket. I booked it for when my parents aren’t home. They don’t have to know. This is who I am and they cannot stop me. Soon I will be there where Apandah lives. I only wish for one thing…

that he’s as ready as I am.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ryf0wl

OMFG😱DID👀 YOU👤 JUST👍 SAY 🗯 DREAM🌛💭 I 👇 FUCKING👄 LOVE💚 DREAM🌛💭 HE🧑 IS👉 MY👇 GOD👼 I👇 CAN,T 🤕 BELIEVE🤯 I👇 LIVE 🩸 IN👉👌 THE👅 SAME▶️◀️ WORLD🌍 AS🍑 HIM🧑 EVERY🖐 NIGHT🌚 I👇 DREAM🌛💭 ABOUT👉 HIM👆 HE🧑 ALSO➕ HELPED🤝 ME👇 FIND🔍 MY👇 SEXUALITY🏳️‍🌈 I👇 AM💬 DREAM🌛💭💚 SEXUAL💞 EVER🖐 TIME🕐 I👇 WATCH👀 HIS🧑MANHUNT👨🦌 I👇 CUM💦 HE🧑 MAKES🤲 ME👇 CUM💦 ALL🖐 THE👅 TIME🕐 I👇 ALSO➕ LISTEN 👂 TO👉 HIS🧑 SONG🎶 MASK😷 AND🙌 IT🤡 IS👉 JUST😋 SO💪 GOOD😄 I👇 SING🎤 IT🤡 IN👉👌 MY👇 SCHOOL🏫 EVERY🖐 DAY🌅 I👇 JUST😋 LOVE💚 HIM🧑 SO💪 MUCH🙌

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rye88p

Hey everyone the zee here thanks for watching also follows me on twitter and instagram also check out my socials, thank you, everyone for subscribers on cringe and something like that, and thanks for I don't know how much on patreon, and uhhhh have a good day

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ryclcy

About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.

I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"

Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ryadx9

HOLY SHIT. DO NOT LOOK AT THIS UNLESS YOU HAVE SEEN EVERYTHING. DO NOT EVEN ACT LIKE YOU SAW THIS UNLESS YOU HAVE STUDIED EVERY SINGLE FORM OF MEDIA EVER. YOU NEED TO HAVE THOROUGHLY STUDIED EVERY SINGLE FUCKING MOLECULE ON THIS PLANET. DO NOT LOOK AT THIS UNTIL YOU HAVE GONE ACROSS THE ENTIRE OBSERVABLE UNIVERSE AND DOCUMENTED EVERY ATOM. YOU NEED TO ACHIEVE GODHOOD AND KNOW WHERE EVERY SINGLE ELEMENTARY FUCKING PARTICLE IS IN THE ENTIRE OMNIVERSE, WHERE IT WAS AT ANY GIVEN TIME, AND WHERE IT WILL BE. SIMULATE EVERYTHING THAT EVER HAS OR HASN'T BEEN IN THE SPAN OF AN INFINITELY SMALL TIME ON REPEAT FOREVER, AND THEN YOU CAN READ THIS.

Anyways, here's what I was gonna say:

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ry9aff

Einstein, Newton, Hawking, all great thinkers throughout history. They all had major questions that they desired answers to. While they all had a strive for knowledge, not everything was in their grasp. While I do not see myself as one with high intelligence, patience, or really any kind of talent or skill, I believe I can discover one great mystery. In this paper, I shall discuss why my penis is so goddamn small.

For context, while I am a man of above average stature, my Johnson does not appear to scale correctly to my size. Many may describe it as a ‘micro-penis’. Partners in the past have voiced complaints and the possibility that I may just be a woman with a prominent clitoris. I assure you that this is not the case, but it is rather concerning that some could see this as a believable theory.

As part of my research, I decided to ask a range of people what their opinions are of my penis. This was to ensure that this was not just the bias of sexual partners who have been with much larger men and see me as disappointing in comparison.

Mother - “Your winkie looks the same as the day you were born! While it seemed fine then, I am a bit worried that it doesn’t seem to have changed much as you got older. Now do you want chicken nuggets or french fries for dinner?”

My current partner Stacy - “I keep telling you that I’ll only jack that pimple off if you upgrade the Netflix subscription.”

Thad, Stacy’s very close friend and masseuse - “Bro, I don’t think you have much you need to worry about. While it might not have the length, it has other qualities that more than make up for it. The thickness is top notch. Not enough to make it a chode, but you have enough diameter to give it a presence. Your erection reaches a good angle, I’d say around 105 degrees above flaccid. Your penis also does not seem to have much of a curve port or starboard. You also display very good public upkeep. The trim is nice on both the pubis and the ballsack.”

So I certainly seemed to receive a mixed reaction to my mini-me. While the women in my life seem to expect more, Thad was very supportive. I’ve always liked Thad, he bought me a Nintendo Switch for Christmas last year. I played it all through Stacy’s extended, loud massage session in her bedroom. However, I still desired to discover what caused me to be lacking in an important area.

One obvious source would be genetics. If other family members struggled with their size, then it would be no wonder that I would struggle with the same issue. This required me to do some research into family members.

First was my father. This was rather simple. All I had to do was invite him to a session at the gym. After our extended workout, we both headed to the showers. He had no fear stripping right off in front of me. To my surprise I was greeted with what can only be described as an elephant. This was basically the Godzilla of dicks. This left me absolutely gobsmacked and I had to pull my jaw back up from surprise. My father offered to scrub me down but I declined, there was more research to be done.

My father left me utterly confused so I had to continue looking. It’s possible that this trait could skip generations. That meant that I had to go and examine my grandfather. He lives in a retirement home and receives lots of aid due to his dementia. I went to visit him for the first time in 5 years. I usually avoided the man since he started shouting racial slurs at dogs. I entered his room to find him sitting in a wheelchair looking out the window. I sat to chat to him for a while while thinking of an excuse to catch a look. He soon mentioned that he needed to use the bathroom, so I took my chance and offered to help. I wheeled him to the toilet and stripped him off. I was hoping to see a peanut, but what I saw was a melon. Again, I was presented with an object so large I was surprised I wasn’t pulled into its orbit. His member rolled out like a garden hose and almost hit the toilet water. I ran out in fear and returned home to rethink my research.

So far, it seemed that I am some kind of anomaly in my family. All other men that I had examined displayed a far greater size than myself, enough to make a horse blush. Meanwhile, I possess something an ant would laugh at. This only left me with the possibility that the cause is not genetic, but is actually an outside source.

This got me thinking about the quote from my mother. She seemed to have a vivid memory of my size as a baby which came off as quite odd. I myself had never been too interested in what I was like as an infant so I had never looked at any old photos. Perhaps it was time for me to do so. I returned to the old family home and went into the attic. I found the box labelled ‘90s photos’ and took a look inside. The photos left me absolutely mortified. What I saw was an infant with fully defined pecs and abs. He was lifting different weights over his head in each photo, each heavier than the next. I ran downstairs to my mother to demand an explanation. It turns out that since the age of 1, my parents had been providing me with performance enhancing steroids. When questioned about why, she explained that they wanted to give me a physical boost from birth. They wanted me to grow up to be a famous athlete or become a professional wrestler. They stopped providing me with steroids when they found me tearing the heads off of rats.

In the end, the answer is rather simple, my parents are cunts.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ry8jv8

I love missionary position, but the girl I met week ago wants to have it in doggy style
Should I go for it (asking because some people say anal sex is not good for health)
I don't know how to mark a content as nsfw so sorry for inconvenience

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ry74tg

Hey, I read somewhere that mathematicians can turn a sphere inside out.

Yes. That's true.

What's the big deal? Just poke a hole in it and pull it through!

Sure, but the point is to do it without making a hole.

But then it seems impossible!

You're right. You cannot do it with an ordinary sphere, like a basketball. You have to understand the rules of the game. This sphere is made of an abstract, elastics material that can stretch, and bend, and pass through itself; But you cannot rip or puncture this material without destroying it, and you cannot crease it, or bend it sharply.

If the surface can pass through itself, what's the problem?

Do you think allowing self-intersections makes it easy? Try it.

I'll push the two halves right through each other!

Be careful! What about that ring around the equator? Remember, you mustn't tear or crease it.

Ugh! Let me try again.

That's no good either, you're pinching it infinitely tight.

But then there's no way! It's impossible! You'd have to crease or pinch it to turn it inside out!

It is surprising, but watch this:

**sphere proceeds to turn inside out**

Is this it? Is this a sphere turning inside out?

You bet! That wasn't easy to follow, was it? To figure out what was going on, let's look at something simpler. A circle. We'll build a vertical wall along the circle so that we can color the two sides differently. Can you gradually turn this circle, into this other circle? Where the purple and gold sides are reversed, without creating sharp corners?

Of course! I can turn a rubber band inside out.

Remember, we're really trying to turn the circle inside out. We only built the wall so we could see the different sides.

Oh, yes. The wall has to stay vertical, and it can't have creases but it can pass through itself. Fine. Let me try.

**proceeds to crease the circle**

Watch out! That was a sharp bend! If we could make sharp bends in the material, we'd be able to turn any curve into any other, by moving each point of the initial curve in a straight line toward a target point in the final curve.

But I can avoid corners altogether by making a loop smaller and smaller!

That's an interesting idea, but pulling a loop tight is not really a gradual change. It's like having a corner in disguise. So it's against the rules.

Well if you can't have corners, and you can't pull loops tight, I think it's impossible to turn the circle inside out!

Yes. You're right.

Wait a minute. Am I supposed to believe you can turn a sphere inside out, but not a circle?

Yes. There is something fundamental about curves that would have to change if you were to turn a circle inside out, and that something cannot change under our allowed motions.

And what's that?

I'll explain; Imagine a monorail atop the wall.

**the monorail rises**

Now the rule about monorail traffic is that the car only travels forward, and it always keeps the purple wall on its right. We'll use a diagram to monitor the car's direction. On this track, the car is always turning left. As it goes around the circle once, it makes one full turn toward the left. On a more complicated track, the car might sometimes be turning left, and sometimes right. But the net amount of turning after one complete circuit is always some number of full turns in one direction or the other. The number of full turns it makes toward the left is called the curve's turning number. For a curve where there is more turning toward right then toward the left, the turning number is negative.

Hey, and if there is no net turning, the turning number is zero!

Right!

I had a hard time following the net turning for this winding track.

That's natural. But there's another way to get the right answer; Find the spots where you're traveling in a particular direction, like due east.

Let's see, since we're looking from the south that would be where ever the monorail is going toward our right, where we see the purple wall face on.

Exactly. At some of these points, the track is curving away from us. Viewed from here it looks like a smile. At these places, the car would be turning left. At others, the track looks like a frown curving towards us, at these points the car would be turning right. The net number of full turns increases when the car passes a smile and decreases when it passes a frown. Starting at zero; One, two, three, four, three, two, and we finish with three. The turning number is the number of smiles minus the number of frowns.

I see, the turning number measures happiness! :)

If you insist. Now, the nice thing about the turning number is that it remains the same when a curve changes according to our rules. Frowns and smiles can appear or disappear, but only in pairs that balance out. The number of smiles minus the number of frowns never changes.

So a curve can only turn into another curve with the same turning number?

Right! The turning number is the fundamental property I mentioned before. Now, what's the turning number for the two circles?

Hmm. This one has one smile and no frowns so the turning number is one. And if the gold is outside, one frown and no smiles, minus one. It makes sense! On one curve you're turning left all the time, on the other, it's the opposite!

Good! So, the reason you cannot turn a circle inside out-

Is that would change the turning number! But wait, doesn't the same argument prove that you cant turn a sphere inside out? This sphere has a three dimensional smile, and this one has a three dimensional frown; So they have different turning numbers!

Not quite. Your analogy is good, but to make it complete we must look at a general surface and consider all the points where it is horizontal and gold is on top. We'll draw horizontal stripes to make these points easier to locate. Smiles are like bowls, curving up. Frowns are like domes, curving down. But there are other points where the surface is horizontal, that are neither bowls nor domes, they are saddles and look like smiles from one direction and frowns from another. Near a bowl or a dome the horizontal stripes form rings, near a saddle they form an 'X'.

But how does that change anything? Spheres don't have saddles!

Ah, but the point is how these features interact. Look, a dome and a saddle can come together and cancel out. Likewise, a bowl and a saddle can cancel out; But bowls and domes, like electrical charges of the same sign, normally don't get near each other. The unchanging number for surfaces then is this; Add domes and bowls, and subtract saddles. This number is one for the sphere no matter which face is out.

Okay. I'm willing to believe that turning numbers don't prevent the sphere from turning inside out, as they do the circle, but that doesn't mean you can actually do it.

We'll get to that. I know It's hard to see. Steve Smale proved it was possible in theory in 1957, but it took seven years before Arnold Shapiro found a practical way to do it. Since the problem remained hard to visualize, more methods were invented later by Bernard Morin and several others. I'll show you Bill Thurston's method, invented in 1974. Let's go back to curves for a bit. Remember that this circle can only be changed into curves of turning number one.

Still not allowing sharp corners, right?

Of course. Now, can the circle be turned into any curve of turning number one? Say, this one?

Let's see. I'll try to go backwards from this curve to the circle. I think I got it- There.

Excellent. Now try this one.

Hmm. I'll undo this loop first, and push this fold back. Now, here. Here we go!

Very good! And this one?

Woah. You're not gonna ask me to do every single curve of turning number one, are you?

Of course not. What we need is a general method. Do you remember the simple way to transform one curve to another when sharp bends are allowed?

Yes! You just go straight from one to the other.

That's the one. When the curves have the same turning number this method can be adapted to work without sharp bends. The trick is to add waves to the curve.

Can we do it on a simpler one?

Sure. We start by marking small pieces of the curve that serve as guides for the transformation. We'll concentrate on these segments now. We move the centers of the guide segments straight towards their final destinations on the circle without any rotation. Next, we rotate the guides so they are lined up with the circle.

Okay, what about the parts in between?

That's where the waviness comes in. We make the connecting segments between adjacent guides bulge out into corrugations. This allows the segments to move freely around each other as long as they remain more or less parallel.

Oh, I see. The guides can move around without creating sharp bends.

Correct. Here is the transformation of the whole curve.

The original curve, in blue, develops sharp corners but the wavy curve is springy enough to remain smooth throughout.

We have to keep adjacent guides roughly parallel as we rotate them to aline with the circle. This is possible as long as the turning number of the original curve is one.

Why can't we aline the guides if the turning number isn't one?

Watch what happens when we try to turn a figure eight into a circle.

**the waviness tangles like a phone cord**

And here, both the initial and final curve have turning number zero. Using this method, or others, you can always transform one curve into another with the same turning number. This is called the Whitney Graustein theorem.

And what does this have to do with the sphere?

A lot. Think of the sphere as a stack of circles deformed into a barrel shape. And closed off by caps above and below. Just as we made our curves more playable by dividing them into guide segments connected by waves, we divide the barrel into guide strips that alternate with wavy strips. The waviness dies out at the top and bottom, so as to match the caps.

Hmm, this is going to get complicated.

Then, for now, let's look at a single guide strip along with the caps.

Start by pushing the two caps past each other.

Before, when I pushed the poles through, it made a crease!

Stop before the crease, when the guide has a loop in the middle. Now we turn the two caps in opposite directions because we want to convert the loop in the middle to twisting at the ends.

Oh, I know! It's like a belt! If you put a loop in the middle and pull the ends tight, the loop turns into twisting.

Right. Then you can straighten out the belt by turning each end half a turn in opposite directions. To finish the eversion we just need to push the middle of the guide strip back through the center of the sphere.

Hm. Can I see how two guide strips interact?

Sure. You can see that there are two places where the strips intersect near the central axis.

And the gold sides that started facing out are now facing in!

Here is the whole process with all the guides.

The polar caps just move up and down, and then rotate into place! Ah, that's why they don't require any springiness!

Exactly! Now, let's look at two guides and the corrugation between them, from a pole to the equator. This chunk is the fundamental building block of the eversion. The whole sphere is made from sixteen rotated copies of this piece.

That looks pretty complicated

Yes, but the corrugation is just following the twisting of the guide strips that you saw before.

Can I see that from pole to pole?

Yes. The corrugation provides flexibility between the guides so that their motion does not create any pinches or creases. Just like the waves in the curve that we saw before.

Let me see the whole thing.

We corrugate the connecting strips between the guides and push the caps past each other. We twist the caps to undo the middle loops and push the equator across the sphere. Finally, we uncorrugate.

I still don't understand! Is there some other way to look at this?

Okay. We'll divide the sphere into thin, horizontal ribbons. We'll look at one ribbon at a time. You can see the north pole push down into the south. A ribbon near the pole is rather tame. The guide segments keep their positions relative to one another, and the corrugations never get very deep. Ribbons closer to the equator are wilder, so we'll split the screen to see what's going on. On the right, the camera tracks the ribbon from above so its apparent size does not change. This overhead view highlights the symmetries hidden in the side view on the left, where we see the position of the ribbon in space. At the equator, the ribbon just twists and doesn't move up or down.

Wait a minute, this ribbon looks just like the wall under the monorail and it's turning inside out! You had finally convinced me that that was impossible!

I'll play that again. Remember that our walls represented circles and had to stay vertical, but here the ribbon can twist around in space because it's part of a sphere. Another way to understand the eversion is to progressively build up the surface of the sphere at a few important stages. This is the corrugation phase.

**rrrrrr clap**

Now we've just pushed the caps through each other.

**rrrrrr clap**

This is the middle of the twisting phase. We can see the complex activity at the equator.

**rrrrrr clap**

At the end of the twisting phase, the corrugations have nearly become figure eights.

**rrrrrr clap**

Here, we're in the middle of pushing horizontally through the center of the sphere.

**rrrrrr clap**

Finally, we show the uncorrugation phase. The sphere is now entirely purple.

**rrrrrr clap**

Wow. I think I'm ready to see the whole thing again.

Here goes.

**the sphere turns inside out, but with more understanding**

You were right! You can turn a sphere inside out without poking holes or creasing it, even though you can't do it for a circle. This is great! Somebody should make a movie about this stuff!

**roll credits! ding**

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ry5qnv

I’m colorblind. Shared this with a class of students one afternoon and they didn’t believe me. I opened up Google Images, searched for colorblind tests, and enlarged the first image I couldn’t make out.

“See, I can’t tell what this is. It all just looks like a series of dots.”

“Bro.”

“What?”

“Bro,” student gets wide-eyed, “you really can’t see that?”

“Nope. Why? What is it? 42? The letter B?”

“Dude, it’s a penis.”

Unbeknownst to me, I had pulled up a colorblind test of a dick and balls.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ry50yw

Thank you for fighting with YouTube to get your channel back up man. I was starting to become uncivilized and rabid like a dog on his first days of rabies. I was in the corner rocking back and forth, the sun unable to touch my skin for a moth nothing was more nothing was less just emptiness. The rabies progressed heightening to a new form I begin to look pale my teeth grew sharp, my toe nails growing, my finger nails scratching at the wall, my body was skinny and my ribs were showing. Just two days ago, I checked my phone, my eyes closing and opening from the lack of sleep. I got a sudden urge to check Twitter suddenly I saw it the bright Minute movies sign, my eyes were starting to stay open. “No WAY!!!” I yelled. I immediately went to YouTube checking and finally heard your sweet, succulent, ear-licking, Asmr, narrative voice come out through my head phones. I begin to shake crying with tears of joy. I have finally become human again all thanks to you. P.S. you kinda cute bro, but on a serious note, you inspire me man you make my day with your jokes and every day I watch you you, make my day easier and peaceful just listening to you talk, I don’t know how much I can thank you but I love your vids man keep it up.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ry4ceb

This is how I would fuck her after seeing her with this outfit on;
It would start off with kissing, then kissing her neck and going down to her pussy. I would eat it as I finger it as if I’m trying to unclog a sink. Then I’d have her suck my cock and kiss it as well. I’d make her brush her teeth with my cock using my cum as her toothpaste. She’d stick it all the way down her throat til she turns blue and when I take it out to give her some air she immediately puts it back in. I would fuck her ass in every way possible. Worshipping it. Tongue fucking her ass, licking her asscrack up and down like an envelope, and exploring every inch of her ass with my tongue. Then stick my cock in it and completely destroy it. Just feeling the weight of her fat juicy booty slapping against me as she moans in pleasure. I’d then fuck her in every position possible. I’d stick my cock deep inside of her pussy constantly thrusting in her passionately. She’d hold on to me for dear life saying that she loves me. I’d pick her up with my cock still inside of her and fuck her standing. I’d fuck her from the back standing as I pin her against the wall and pull her hair. She would moan louder than at her concerts. I’d suck and fuck her tits too. Just nibbling on her nipples and squeezing them. I’d suck her milk out and stick my cock in between them just enjoying the moment. When I feel myself about to cum I’d take my cock out from between her tits and stick it in her pussy and she would beg me to cum in her and I would. I’d impregnate her and she would hold me in to make sure that my cum goes deep inside of her. She would have to use a wheelchair to walk for the next 2 months because of how bad I’d destroy her but she would get out of the wheelchair and crawl over to me begging me to do it again.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ry2qn0

I make people laugh every day. I'm a lot more funny in person than I am online. On the computer, I'm not good at loosening my tie. In person, I'm the same way, but I have a much better sense of humor than you'd think. Especially when it comes to making fun of my uncle's bald head. He hates me for that constant reminder. Every. Single. 2 Weeks.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ry2m01

Damn just pull it out... Swing it around... Look all buff, show ur stuff, make her wet, on her bed, show ur skill, oh the thrill, go in dive feel her thrive, Be a G put the sting to the Bee ur D to the V, what will she see.. the key to her preg-nan-cy, do the deed on her sheet, trembling on her feet she feels the heat, suck and blow cum and go, that's her part, be so smart play ur card, pot of greed, balls full with seed, thats her treat, ain't that neat, That's the plan so be a man 'cause in her eyes.. ur so the only one who may and can.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ry0utf

Is anything actually even partly ok? I don't think so. Just 2 letters "ok" is. I mean what significance does the word have? Absolutely nothing except maybe giving one a sense of temporary relief of being "ok" or to the one saying it. It doesn't help in the long run. Trust me. Pretending to be "ok" is as good as seeing an oasis. U may end up urself not being "ok". That's why i don't rely on that word for my sake of freedom from a lie which I'm not even sure if its true. Better not say anything than say that. It brings utter fiasco.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rxzvb0

When I had a herniated disc and sciatica as a result, I spent a couple months on opioids. And, predictably, I got constipated. First time I ever dealt with constipation in my life- at least for more than a day.

I didn't shit for over a week near the end of it, and I was in absolute agony. I had the *constant*, immediate urge to shit. Stomachaches, cramps, the works. Tried laxatives. Stool softeners, Coffee. Everything.

When it finally happened, I thought I might have a heart attack during the process. Clothes came off. Suuuuper sweaty. Seeing colors as I strained to just get that very first, rock hard "plug" out.

Man, when it *did* come out, it truly was orgasmic. My eyes rolled back as it *poured* out of my body. Mouth agape. Pure bliss.

It ended up being so much shit that I *filled* the toilet, for the first time in my life. Truly one of my finest moments.

Yeah, it was absolutely orgasmic. Afterwards, I got into bed and slept so soundly that I remember that moment of drifting to unconsciousness *years* later.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rxzmf4

A year ago they stormed the capitol, but I miss storming your heart. 💔 They wore their tribal uniforms, while we should have been making the real tribe - a family. 👶 Some of them may have been arrested, but I promise our relationship would never see an arrested development. Reflecting on the actions that went down that day, it makes me regret never going down on you. 👅 The politicians may have been scared but I assure you nothing is scarier to me than losing you. 😱 Well anyway, hope things have been good for you… things have been good for me, I've been getting more into politics as you can see 🇺🇸

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rxyimk

Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this video. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rxxf95

I'm a hardcore hololive fan, so many times I
would even try to escape reality with lucid
dreaming, would be with all the other EN
girls where would often play with Amelia in
her streaming room and help Calliope with her songs, but one day as was talking to Gura, we went to my dormitory for a private talk. She immediately said, "You know you could live with us forever..." I gave her a confused look and she continued, "We understand that you live on earth and you REALLY wish to live here" then said "How... How did you know?" She then giggled and said Because we've been watching you, silly!"

This was a dream come true and almost cried right there. She then said, "| talked with Yagoo and he agreed that you would be PERFECT for Holostars EN, you just have to do. one thing" She then held my hand and looked deep into my eyes and said "You have to kill yourself for the transfer to work correctly." I then gave her some questions, "How long do have before the deal expires?" She then said "Yagoo said 3 months." I added by saying "What's the most painless way?..." She giggled again, "Suicide will require pain buuut...if you want it quick... Get a gun and a nice shot to the head works."
then agreed and she gave me a kiss on the forehead, "I know this will be tough but once it's over and done, you'll get to live here!" I then woke up and this was last week and purchased a gun. i might actually kill myself because that dream just felt too real to be fake and my life isnt doing so grand.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rxumn5

as long as i’m not influencing her in a negative way to trying to make her do something that she is abt mentally ready for there is nothing immoral about it. nothing about the way we met, the way we started talking, and the way we are together is pedophilic, as pedophilia is characterized by “sexual interest in prepubescent children”. if you seriously believe that someone with a 8 month age difference to me has significantly less development, you are illogical. nothing about my attraction to her is due to her age or the fact she is a lower grade. additionally, because girls mature earlier and faster than boys, it is highly likely we are at the same developmental levels proportionally. our relationship will never break a state, federal, or international rule, and those rules, which we abide by for so many other parts of our lives, found the backbone of moral obligations as well.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rxuuid