I've come to make an announcement

shadow the hedgehog is a bitch ass motherfucker

he pissed on my fucking wife

that's right he took his hedgehog fucking quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking wife and he said his dick was "THIS BIG"

and I said THATS DISGUSTING

so I'm making a call out post on my twitter dot com

shadow the hedgehog you got a small dick like the size of this walnut but way smaller

and guess what? here's what my dong looks like!

boom boom boom boom boom boom

that's right BABY all points NO quills NO pillows that's right it looks like 2 balls and a bong!

he fucked my wife so guess what? I'm going to fuck the earth!

THATS RIGHT THATS WHAT YOU GET MY SUPER LASER PISS!

except I'm not going to piss on the earth, I'm going to go higher! I'm pissing on the fucking moon!

boom boom boom boom boom boom

how do you like that Obama?! I pissed on the moon you fucking idiot!!

you have 23 hours before the piss DRRRRROPLETS hit the FUCKING EARTH

now get out my fucking sight before I piss on you too!

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ruidtb

I CANT STAND IT ANYMORE

Its been almost 10 minutes without Tarkov, I can't stop shaking and I'm having severe withdrawls. I woke up today trying to log onto tarkov but the servers was down, I had a major panic attack but managed to calm down after a few hours. I couldn't go to school today, and I can barely breathe.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rugv1w

Guys i'm not racist 😃

Oh wait i got a little rasict 😳

Oh shit i'm getting more racist 🥶

Fuck fuck fuck im becoming mega racist 😱

Oh nvm im normal again 😁

OH SHIT IM SO ULTRA RACIST FUCK FUCK FUCK 😖

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IM SO RACIST THAT EVEN HITLER WAS MORE ACCEPTING THAN ME 😨😨😨

#**AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA**

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rufawg

OMG like, heyaa💋 Sooo um 😅This is super random and funny and stuff but, like… You’re AUTISTIC right😏? Wait wait nooo🤣! Don’t like, have a little freak out or whatever! Goshh you got all red! LOL you’re so like, awkward😅cmoon you can tell meee! We’re besties now! You’ll make me happy! 😘Totes an Aspie rite? Mmm? Cant hear you cutie💖little louder, cmon! Speak up🤭! USE YOUR WORDS RETARD~UGH. YEAH😍!? YAS!😜 Knew it omg! You were totes acting weird, making stupid noises, playing with your hands….Oh and don’t think I didn’t notice the only time you looked up at me was to stare at my big butt lol! 🙄SOOO Not subtle! It’s ok tho umm… 😳I think autistic NEETS like you are pretty hot… Soooo are you like, one of those porn addicts who got brain damage from gooning to hard , ooor… are you a natural Aspie? Like, born with it and stuff😩? 🥵Natural? Oh fuck yeah O.M.G…..! Like, Awesome! Hey umm… you wanna hang out? I got some cool friends you’ll love! They know all about people like you🧩!

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rudiu1

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠤⠀⠄⡀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡆⠀⠀⠀⠈⣄⣠⠶⠋⠁⠀⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⢄⡀⢀⡠⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠄⠒⠒⢂⡄⠤⠀⠀⠐⠧⠀⡀⠀⢀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡌⠀⠀⡠⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⠁⠢⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⢠⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢡⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠱⠃⢀⣀⣤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡈⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠃⠀⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠠⠈⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠐⠊⠩⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡈⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢄⠀⠀⢀⣠⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢳⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠔⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⡖⠂⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢎⢀⣠⣿⣿⠟⠉⠠⢀⠀⡠⠀⢀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⢄⠀⠀⠀⠑⠅⠀⠌⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠑⠀⠄⠀⠠⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rubkjr

People - do NOT let schools tell you that your children are required to learn to read!! People lived for 2000 years before the bible was written and they did just fine.

I have done my own research and can tell you there is definitely a link over time between the percentage of children taught to read and the number of kids who are diagnosed with autism!!! And did you know that most literacy programs are owned by Big Book companies?? Wake the F up!!!!

There is such a thing as "heard literacy" - we can hear other people reading. If enough people learn to read, it means not all of us have to. Do not let them tell you that you can't work or go to school or shop in certain stores just because you exercise your right to not read!! That is a violation of your rights!!!

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ruavw7

Holy FUCK that is a loud and sudden clip with really poor high-band fidelity. Jesus christ, I'd tell you to put a warning on it, but that's way worse than anything else I've ever encountered with that warning label on it. I don't usually go around blaming people for my PTSD symptoms, but goddamn, I feel like you just personally came to my house and blew up a fucking bomb. Fuck off. And fuck this clip. If this is going to be a meme format, I'm unsubscribing from every fucking meme sub.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ruam1m

Chad "Yeah Dude I've Got This Great Idea For A Company Let Me Tell You Bro It's Going To Revolutionize The Startup Industry When You Hear About How Much I Got On My Series A Financing You'll Want To Angel Invest In My Business Like Yesterday Bro Listen Up Why Don't You Come Over For Dinner Tonight And We Can Talk Shop No Wife And Kids Bro Just Us Dudes Hanging Out Having Brewskies While We Talk About How We're Going To Change The World Bro It's Gonna Be Sick Bro Hey Dude Have You Ever Gone To Breckenridge Bro Bro Let Me Tell You Bro That I Was Just There Shredding Powder And Bro Let Me Tell You That A Vodka And Red Bull While You Hit The Slopes Is Just The Sickest Bro I Mean You Think You've Lived When Your First Company Goes Public But Bro Let Me Tell You That It's Sicker Than A Successful Series C Round And Techcrunch Writes All About You Bro What Could Be Better Than That Bro Bri What's Your Insta Hit Me Up Follow Me Bro Leave A Message Bro I Always Read Them Bro Nobody Looks At Facebook Now Bro Bro The Newest Thing Is This Idea I Have That I'm Shopping Around Bro You'll Love It Hey Wanna Come Over Tomorrow Night To Talk Shop We Can Send The Misses Out For A While So It's Just Us Bros Bro And Then We Can Talk About How We'll Have Two Ways To Run The Planet Bro Seriously Bro This Is Gonna Be Off The Hook Hey Bro Have I Ever Told You About How I Started My First Company When I Was 17 Bro Dude I Did It While In College Bro But Then Bro I Was Like Let's Sell this Bro And Get To The Next You Know What They Say Right Bro Always Be Closing Bro Dude Bro Let Me Tell You Bro That I'm On My 19th Company Bro And It's Going Sick Bro You Wanna Get It On The Ground Floor Bro Or Else You'll Get Left Behinf Bro I'm Gonna Take This Public Bro Get Us Bought Bro And It's Gonna Make Us Jillionaires Do You Know How Many Jillions You Have To Have To Be A Jillionaire Well It's A Lot I Should Know All My Friends Are Already Jillionaires In Forbes Jillion Under A Jillion And That's Where I'm Headed Bro So Bro Stick With Me Bro And We'll Get To The Top Bro You Can Be Like My Right Hand Man Bro My Handbro" Broski

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ru8dj3

1. One cold night.
2. There were to people that didn't know they were meant with each other.
3. Their names were Ryelow and Dreamer
4. one day they met up and Ryelow made Ryelow 2, with Dreamer as an ryelow.ml admin.
5. They didn't know that they were getting closer friends. Maybe they're even getting closer than that.
6. \--Dreamer'S PERSPECTIVE--
7. I felt cold and alone. i had no friends. Had. now i have Ryelow. i feel like hes more of a friend. i'm not telling him that i think that, though. How we met was simple. Finobe Discord. In Early 2019, Ryelow made Ryelow 2, and I was invited to it. I made some CRINGY videos with it, and we started becoming friends. Now we skip to 2016. I wanna fuck him.
8. \--Ryelow'S PERSPECTIVE--
9. He looked alone. His server was filled with new users that are doomed to never come back. I had friends, and I think he was another friend that I could make. He's... hot. I mean.. don't you look at that ass and want to bit-- oh.. sorry about that. I'm attracted. Sex. Now.
10. \--3RD PERSON--
11. Dreamer had enough, he was going to tell Ryelow the truth. He loved him. He didn't know that Ryelow loved him, too. Ryelow was unprepared for this moment.
12. \--Ryelow'S HOUSE, 9:24 PM AT NIGHT--
13. Dreamer knock's on Ryelow's door. Ryelow answers, rudely interrupted from his Ryelow.ml site development. "Hey, Ryelow." mumbled Dreamer. "I need to tell you something."
14. "One moment," replied Ryelow. Ryelow goes into his house to close ryelow.ml for a bit. Then he comes back out. "What is it that you need to tell me?"
15. "Well, can I come in?" asked Dreamer nervously.
16. "S-Sure.." answered Ryelow, unsure.
17. "S-so b-basically.. I'm in m-mad love with you." Dreamer said slowly. Ryelow went red.
18. "I..." said Ryelow trying to reply.
19. "You can stay away from me, I'll understand." replied Dreamer
20. "N-No.. I feel the same.." Ryelow said, red and nervous.
21. "Hehe.. you're cute.." Dreamer teased.
22. "I WANT TO HA-" Ryelow stopped himself. Dreamer knew what he was going to say. Dreamer would gladly accept if he finished the thought.
23. "Go on..." said Dreamer.
24. "h-have.... s-s-ex" Ryelow is the reddest of reds right now.
25. "With who?" replied Dreamer, who was confident to get Ryelow under the sheets.
26. "D-Dreamer" Ryelow finally finished.
27. "Lets go to the bed, cute one." Said Dreamer.
28. \--THE BEDROOM--
29. They wouldn't speak. They were ready. Ryelow was laid on the bed by Dreamer. They began kissing. Ryelow reached under Dreamer's pants. Dreamer was already hard. Dreamer was just the right size to turn Ryelow on. Ryelow was ready to be taken by the iFunny memer.
30. "Dreamer," Ryelow asked "can you fuck me as hard as you can?" Dreamer chuckled, and nodded. Dreamer undressed Ryelow, then undressed himself.
31. Dreamer was going in. Dreamer inserted his dick into Ryelow slowly. Ryelow started to moan
32. "A-ah.. yes.. oh fuck.." Dreamer could see that Ryelow was enjoying him. Dreamer goes faster. Ryelow is having the time of his life. Ryelow had his dream achieved, fucked silly by Dreamer. After hours of fucking, Dreamer came in Ryelow's tight ass.
33. Ryelow cleaned up in the bathroom first.
34. "Holy fuck. we need to do that again." Ryelow talked to himself. After cleansing, Dreamer went in and washed up. They both sleeped together, hugging.
35. Written by dreamer
36. \-dreamer 15/8/2019 19:45

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ru8dlr

I herby pledge to The anti dream discord. I will not let Dream stans, Dreamsexuals, Or Dreamgenders stand tall, we will destroy them. I shalt not post media that supports Dream, Dreamsexuals/Dreamgenders, and the Dream SMP I shalt not plan server raids as this is against discord's TOS. I will treat Dream stans, Dreamgenders/Dreamsexuals, and Dream SMP fans as if they have no human rights. Dreamsexual/Dreamgender will never be valid, While all other gender/sexualities will. By reacting to this message, I herby declare myself as a DREAMPHOBIC.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ru7s6t

And you stare at me
In your Jesus Christ pose
Arms held out
Like you've been carrying a load
And you swear to me
You don't wanna be my slave
But you're staring at me
Like I
Like I need to be
Saved
Saved
Like I need to be
Saved
Saved
In your Jesus Christ pose
In your Jesus Christ pose
Arms held out
In your Jesus Christ pose
Thorns and shroud
Like it's the coming of the Lord
And I swear to you
I would never feed you pain
But you're staring at me
Like I
Like I'm driving the
Nails
Nails
Like I'm driving the
Nails
Nails
Like I'm driving the
Nails (nails)
Nails (nails)
Nails (nails)
Like I'm driving the
Nails (nails)
Nails
In your Jesus Christ pose
In your Jesus Christ pose
Arms held out
In your Jesus Christ pose
Thorns and shroud
Like it's the coming of the lord
Would it pay you more to walk on water
Than to wear a crown of thorns?
It wouldn't pain me more to bury you rich
Than to bury you poor
In your Jesus Christ pose (poor)
Poor
In your Jesus Christ pose

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ru67dc

Ok guys I am being fully serious here and am looking for an honest response. Is there any good reason as to why we do not have NSFW NFT's? None exist as far as I am concerned. And I'm not talking about like r34 of a bored ape or something, I'm talking about like actual porn on the blockchain. I mean, it's decentralised right? What is stopping us from selling some real good 1080p squirting for a few eth? Have any of you ever seen furries online? Those motherfuckers will pay anything for a fox being fisted by an alligator. Now imagine that image but now on the etherium blockchain for 40 eth. That's easy money if you ask me. Anyways, I would appreciate input form someone who is more involved with this kind of stuff than I am.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ru5ywn

black guys that love to fuck & fuck good if ur a hot black guy & wanna fuck me at 2395 if u wanna move in u can move in but u gotta fuck me i need to be fucked a lot man free food free rent & everything else man here's the deal man men from jail homeless or if ur a thug u wanna come move in ur friend can move in too man piss on me beat me home here now if u see me & u wanna come over today & try it out try it out man if ur in my building try it out u wanna fucking piss on me try it out

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ru4jk9

Tags: Horror, horror, horror, horror, scary, horror, horror, horror, tycoon, tycoon, Tycoon, RolePlay, RPG, Plane Crash, Castle Life, Slenderman, slender, survive, horror, creepy, creepy, elevator, scary, Creepers, zombie, skeleton, Easter, Halloween, survive, survival, scary, jeff the killer, toy story, survive, survive, hangout, boys and girls, horror, survive, survival, survive, survive, survive, survive, survive, survive, survive, survival, buzz, survival, killer, killer, hide, survive, survive, jeff the killer, survive, jason, area 51, area 51, Roblox, Call of Duty, Kestrel, Clothing, Nice, scratches, 3, amazing, my little pony, gta, gta 5, gta iv, uzi, ak, jump, spongebob, sandy, patrick, halloween, town of robloxia, vip, usa, germany, Poland, bite, epic, face, mega vip, cart ride, c4, m4a1, slenderman, nuketown, Tiger, clothing, empite, script, build, hideout, aliens, world war, epic vip, train, ferrari, gt, hannah montana, miley cirus, ben 10, roblox, shedletsky, image, paint, lady gaga, iphone, pocket, hair, extensions, jason, trade, hangout, 300, spartans, dog, tag, anonymous, hacker, purple sparkle, midnight sparkle, green sparkle, clockwork shades, clockies, limiteds, bubbles, apocalypse rising, boat, robot, johnny test, 1, 2, 3, 5, A, B, C, D, high price, low price, favorite, thumbs up, like, Support, builders club, obc, tbc, bc, brighteyes, guitar, famous, front oage, instrument, m, n, u, q, l, o, e, r, y, i, i, , letters, numbers, crop, top, plaid

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ru3dhs

Ayo imma rant here. So basically I had this massive zoot on the weekend and got into bed to watch Netflix. I had it all laid out; popcorn, netflix, water and obvs wank wipes. I was eating the popcorn and decided to have a wank. Fairly high at this point I nut, missing the tissue and spraying everywhere. It was dark and I cleaned up what I thought was it. I reached for a stray piece of popcorn off my pillow and only clocked it was soggy once it was going down my throat. It gave me an infection and I was admitted into hospital after developing breathing problems because of my throat. And now I am cursed by my memory every time I see a bag of popcorn.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ru3f87

I'm hiding in the bathroom but literally she just keeps eating them and it's so fucking loud. And I can't say anything because in the past when I have said stuff she always makes fun of me and tells me I'm overreacting or she'll just give me a weird look. Or her boyfriend would think I'm being mean or something. But I'm also so so close to lashing out. which also would not go well.

Im just so overstimulated and tired and I want to go home and hide under my covers rip :(

​

**not making fun of the sufferer of misophonia (there's a reason why I was on that subreddit, after all) but thought it'd make a good copypasta lol.**

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ru245u

I solemnly declare this document to be my last Will and Testament.

I would like for my Lil Baby Bored Ape #129 (valued at $150,000, or 39.43 ETH) to be donated to The Salvation Army.

I also request that my blue Bored Ape adorned with a boat hat (valued at $78,000, or 521.36 Litecoin) be given to my family’s estate.

In the event that my likeness is turned into an NFT, I would desire that no screenshot be taken of it by friends, loved ones, or other mourners during my Zoom funeral.

I also demand that bidding on the sale of the previously mentioned NFT of myself starts no lower than $75,000 (or 434318.62 DOGE). Once again, I wish for no unlawful screenshot to be taken unless it is done by the legal owner of the NFT post-purchase.

As for the rest of my cash and belongings, I wish that they be incinerated alongside my dead corpse.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/ru0icj

be more fucking creative you fuckin 2 dimentional fuckin square ass cant count to ten ass fucking bitch, crys when they masturbait ass motherfucker how the fuck am i going to eat bricks? why would i fucking eat them. i aint tgoing to unhinge my jmaw like a fucking xenomorph to eat some fuckiing bricks if ic ould do thaty id fuckin eat people you fucking new human species ass little fuck

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rtz3vh

My mum (82F) told me (12M) to do the dishes (16) but I (12M) was too busy playing Fortnite (3 kills) so I (12M) grabbed my controller (DualShock 4) and threw it at her (138kph). She fucking died, and I (12M) went to prison (18 years). While in prison I (12M) invited several riots (3) and assumed leadership of a gang responsible for smuggling drugs (cocaine) into the country. I (12M) also ordered the assassination of several celebrities (Michael Jackson, Elvis Presley and Jeffrey Epstein) and planned a terrorist attack (9/11). Reddit, AITA?

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rtys25

So a month ago I went on a little trip to spain. On the way back out plane had to stop in Italy for 2 hours. I managed to shit once in spain, once in Italy and once in my home country upon arrival, so I managed to shit in 3 different countries in the span of 12 hours. Is this an accomplishment? Of course I won't put it in my CV, but do you know someone that has done something similar? Anyway, I call it the trifecta, you are more than welcome to attempt doing it.

Edit: Thank you all for the support in the comments. I did not expect this much positive feedback, I'm literally shaking rn. Next summer I'll attempt the fourfecta. Will let you know how it goes

Source: https://old.reddit.com/rtxxnf