America, we’ve all been there. It’s an early morning -crack of dawn- and all you want is some carbs to warm you up and give you some energy to make it till lunch. You start making some coffee or tea, but you need some calories, too. If you’re like most Americans, you make some toast.

According to a poll by Reviewed dot com toast is America’s third most popular breakfast food and climbing, due to recent avocado-related trends. In order to make toast, however, you of course need an appliance to toast your bread

We from Colonel Voltage bring you: The Worst Toaster You’ve Ever Had. Our toaster is deliberately dangerous, completely unreliable, fragile as the dickens, but one of the cheapest and easiest to repair toasters on the market. Our product is guaranteed to push you to the brink of despair every morning, and still have you crawling back 24 hours later.

Our product is dangerous. According to the Consumer Product Safety Commission over 150,000 fires between the years 2007-08 were started by faulty appliances. In addition, it estimates that the hottest part of a toaster is roughly one half-inch deep in. As part of Colonel Electric’s initiative to double that number by the year 2025 our engineers have deliberately placed faulty heat sinks at random points at that height on all of our toasters to increase the risk of starting a fire.

To add icing on the cake, our patented crumb-catchers will keep bits and crumbs of bread in your toaster for years to come, constantly singing and re-singing over and over while you are helpless to dig them out.

Our product is unreliable. Our marketing team used General Electric customer reviews in order to determine what they hated most about our competitor’s products. The chief complaint? Unreliability. To maximize this feature, our product has one singular button to control when the bread goes down, the time and temperature of each heater, the time it stays in, and whether or not the toaster will tell you when it’s done. 

Testing shows that there is a 43% chance of a quality piece of toast being produced, just enough to keep our customers trying.

Our product is fragile. If you ever ding or damage our product it will break -not instantly- but the second you try to use it again. The repair indicator light will only go on while in use, and even when no repairs are necessary it will randomly -but rarely- flicker on, keeping you on your toes whether or not you need to repair your toaster.

At this point, you may be asking yourself “Why would I ever buy this torture machine?” The answer, speaking of repairs: its ease of repair and unbeatable price. Our engineers estimate that anyone who has completed 3 or more LEGO sets in their lifetime can fully repair our product with the included parts. All of this comes at a low price of $20, half that of a typical toaster, as well as a $5 lifetime warranty. 

With this lifeline of a great price and guarantee that our product will last you the rest of your life, Colonel Voltage promises our product is just barely good enough for you to consider purchasing.

Eventually, however, our product will wear you down. One morning those curtains next to the toaster will get just a little too hot. One morning the toast will come out half-charred and half-raw. One morning the toaster will break one to many times. On that morning, you’ll break, too, because here at Colonel Voltage, we believe our customers deserve nothing.

Thank you, and have a wonderful day, America!

(credit to owen, good luck on your pitch!)

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r48lw9

shut the fuck up you fat fucking porker tub virgin go outside you stupid twat you cant see your own dick you pumpkin looking ass piece of bacon you got more belly rolls than you got teeth fucking snorlax looking retard

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r47fzf

Mostly depends, Soft white girl's, Slightly chubby but on the skinner side, Around 5,5/5,10. Low muscle so their tummy's are like nice soft pillows, Green eyes, Good at drawing, Has a nice sense of smell and personality, Willing to date a 8/10 like me (Rated by my friends) Nice private parts i can play with, Excellent at cooking, Willing to be mine and only mine, Conservative, Comforting, Ok with having a lot of kids, Healthy, Wears little to no make-up, Nice contour, Soft hands and feet, Wears revealing outfits when together, Good at biology class/Academics in general, Respectful of minorities, And a Christian.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r4601c

Karl Marx made a good point on the history of the world, namely, that the history of men is the history of class struggle. This is an important contribution, but is not as vital as the greater dividing force of people: Sex. The great philosophers of our time have yet to come from the underclass of societies, the underclass of women, so it is clear why this discovery has not been popularised or pinned down for all too long. So let it be heard and made clear: the processes of capital are merely extensions to the processes of men, and capital (the ownership of private property) cannot be purged unless masculinity (the private ownership of women) is also purged. The historical treatment of women that resides in the nature of men is primarily derived from the male sex drive, which in all forms is a form of rape. The ability to dispel the sex drive continually necessitates the invention of marriage. The male sex drive, the male gaze and sexual insinuations present in every culture on the planet is a product of the sex drive which puts women in the lower class via bondage to men in marriage. The implications of everyday interactions through the myopic lens of sex and gender is similar to that of Critical Race Theory, only applied to sex. Sex, then, is merely a mode of violence for the men of the world. In this text you might find it difficult as to which definition of sex I mean. That is exactly the point: in a culture and language founded through masculinity, the woman is merely a variation of the default, the man. Any mention of sex differentiation, then, is in preparation of discussion for primary/only function of women: sex. From the masculine viewpoint, the idea that there are different sexes is essentially the same as the idea of having sex. It can be observed in all natural languages, where men pat the hood of their car (property) as they refer to it a “she”. “That’s what she said” jokes humour the mere idea that another person said something of the exact same phrasing but only spoken from the mouth of a woman. Culturally, in 20th century feminism, we were to close to realising the true value of women, but have returned to a state of sexualisation though hypermodern capitalistic feminism. It should be noted that sexualisation is an expression of one’s sex. (Both definitions, if you haven’t caught on yet, because they truly are the same). There is a light at the end of the tunnel: technology. Through technology we can purge the necessity of men as agents of procreation and begin a global age of womanhood for sisters!

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r43ya3

🚌. 🏃

🚌. 🏃

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🚌. 🏃

🚌. 🏃

🚌. 🏃

🚌. 🏃

🚌. 🏃

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🚌. 🏃

🚌💨🏃

💨...🏃

...🏃

..🚶

.🚶

🚶‍♂️ you son of a bitch

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r43d29

I’ve got an absolutely massive penis. Like a whole ass tree. Like an anaconda but rock hard. It’s absolutely massive. Easily the biggest penis in the country. The length of an elephant’s trunk and the girth of a gorilla fist. Every time I step it drags behind me so much I have to put it in a cart or it gets gravel rash. I don’t have to stand up to go pee, I usually just leave the tip in the bowl while I go about my day. When I cum it takes half a day for the nütte to reach the tip and I easily fill several buckets each time. I have to make sure the tip is either in the bath or the toilet when I cum or it floods the room. Normies makes jokes about “like throwing a sausage down the hallway” but I never understood them because I could easily fill and successfully fuck a hallway to ejaculation. Right now as we speak my three girlfriends are using it as a scarf while they smoke weed and game. Yes, I have three gamer girlfriends that smoke weed. No, you can’t borrow them. They’re my weed smoking gamer girlfriends, and if I stop supplying them with weed at any time they instantly start worshipping my absolutely massive, dummy thicc cock until I give them more.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r42evw

This will be a bit long so I'm sorry but I feel like I need to talk about this We aren't really divided to jocks and nerds but there's this one guy in my class who I used to be good friends with.He was always kind of nerdy, we played videogames together a lot, and last year he even got into anime (like Naruto and Tokyo ghoul...) He's not that bad looking (he's also very tall) so there were girls who showed interest in him. He was never really against LGBT nor black people but for some reason after he became an anime fan he started saying really disgusting racist, homophobic, and misogynistic shit and would also ask personal questions like "are you gay?" Or "are you trans?". Not long ago my friend and I were talking about my ex and that little shit heard about the break up and just asked "You dated someone??? You're not gay, right?". This dude is sickly homophobic. Like on a whole another level. It's not normal... Also there's a new teacher coming and he legit just said "She's not trans, right???" Everybody was looking at him with confusion. He's prob closeted Moral of the story: Don't date and don't be friends with anime weirdos

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r41o34

Lumine's amazing, she really is, but the things aether do to me😩his design is literally so seducing and hot, his waist and hips are so grabbable and his midriff is so fine like who are you showing off for?? his long silky golden braid matches which design so well, and his earrings just make it even better. his beautiful bronze eyes are just so striking yet so warm, and his voice and yelps are just so damn attractive. everyday in all languages I repeat his entire voicelines over and over again just so I can hear that angelic voice of his. I can stare at his pretty body all day and think to myself whoever ends up with this man must me the happiest person on earth his smile is so perfect and wonderful and can we just talk about how submissive and breedable he is?? I just wanna undress him so badly so I can see all of his sexy body on display, I want to fuck him so badly and hear his lewd moans throughout the room. I want him to whisper filthy things in my ear and beg for me to breed him. I want to see his body cum-stained and I want to put soft kisses all over him. I want to use my tongue on him and see him shiver in lust. I worship Aether everyday like the ethereal god he is and I wish I could cuddle and feel his heart beating. I want to tell him everything will be okay, that he'll reunite with his sister and he won't need to worry. He is literally so perfect I love him so much.. 💗

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r413t9

\#nftart #NFT #NFTs #NFTCommmunity #nftrevolution #lazylions #cryptocurrency #CryptoNews #RightClickVictim #RightClickProtection #rightclicksave #ETH #etherium #Bitcoin #dogelon #SHIB #shibainu Alright, it\\'s time to talk about the promising future of NFTs because you462 know what? I\\'m tired. I have been browsing Twitter for the past couple days, looking at the NFT landscape and economics. I have seen many people promising money for everyone, so I bought an NFT for 186k dollars. I had to take a loan, but eventually someone will buy it4 for 500k, so of course it\\'s worth it! But now I have found the other side of NFTs. There are many good for nothing villains out there saying that it\\'s a bubble without understanding how they work. So many people who are jealous of the success of NFTs, and find joy in screenshotting, right click and saving, or whatever form of stealing NFTs they can find. And not only am I now a #Rightclickvictim, but even my wife is against me. She left to live with her parents, and she has been talking about custody of our two children. I can\\'t3292 believe this. The love of my life may actually be thinking about divorcing me because she can not understand the business of the future. I tried to explain it to her, it\\'s not just an image, it\\'s an investment. I buy it for 186k, someone else buys it from me for 500k.127 The previous owner gets money, and the next owner will also get money when someone else buys it for a higher price. But she doesn\\'t understand, this is NOTHING like the tulip mania. If you actually understood what you are talking about, maybe you would see the differences. But she doesn\\'t care. All she\\'s thinking about is divorcing me and getting custody of our children because of my "shitty financial decisions". She doesn\\'t understand that it\\'s not a joke, this is a real investment, just as valid as Microsoft, Apple, Tesla, and whatever other companies Wall Street is dealing with. You buy stock, then someone else buys the stock for a higher price. Simple. But NFTs are even better, because they are NON FUNGIBLE tokens. Stocks are all the same, it doesn\\'t matter which ones you have, but NFTs are the future because they are ALL UNIQUE. They can have artistic value, sentimental value, historic value, etc that normal stocks or currencies can not. Jealous people seem to enjoy turning us NFT bros into #RightClickVictim s, but I WILL NOT stand for this. I will show my wife how wrong she is, thinking it\\'s right to divorce me for buying an NFT for 186k. Mark my words, for this is not the end of NFTs, but the beginning. A new era of currency, where we will NOT be oppressed by the government, and there will be no poor people. I2 may be at a low point in my life, my wife may be trying to divorce me, and it is possible I will lose custody of my children, but I DON\\'T CARE. This is nothing but a small valley right before the Everest of my life, the absolute peak of human achievement. One of the1 first trillionaires in history, preceded only by other fellow NFTbros. Because I have a plan to make NFTs the supreme currency. An infallible plan that will make history, in the same way that people like Nikola Tesla, Isaac Newton or Albert Einstein did. After all, there is no difference between insanity and genius in the eyes of the common man. Maybe NFTs are ahead of their time. That\\'s ok, even if my previously happy life with my wife and children might be gone, I am determined to see this through to the end. The fift industrial revolution, the #NFTrevolution, where we will finally see #nftjustice. GONE are the days of being subjected to a 9 to 5 job under shitty bosses and management, GONE are the days of being told what to do over and over, knowing that if I speak up I will b replaced in the blink of an eye, and soon, GONE will be the days of poverty and world hunger. Look at yourself, are you happy with who you are? Are you happy living for work, living with barely enough money? Look at your surroundings, there are people even les fortunate than you EVERYWHERE. NFTs can solve that problem forever! Don\\'t you see? Just for a few laughs on the internet you steal NFTs, at the cost of the future of humanity. Millions of years of evolution have led to this point, millions of years of unfairness, th law of the strongest an IMMEASURABLE amount of blood shed, all for this very time in history. #NFTartists and owners will spearhead the next era of humanity, where we can finally be free of everything that made humans hopeless. We can fix it ONCE AND FOR ALL, but yo are making it harder. Please, reconsider your actions, even if you don\\'t believe in NFTs. You are actively trying to stop humanity from reaching the next step, the necessary step for our salvation. This planet is being destroyed by climate change. NFTs CAN SOLVE IT Once everyone embraces NFTs and there is no poverty, we can all solve climate change TOGETHER. What is so hard to understand? This is not a get rich quick scam, it\\'s a way of life, a movement that will change society as we know it. And you may be wondering about m plan. How am I going to change humanity? How am I going to make everyone embrace NFTs? How am I going to enforce anti right click and anti screenshot? How am I going to bring #nftjustice and #nftprotection to the world? Well, I am so glad you asked. NFTs are very bi right now, nobody can deny that. However, they have so much more potential it\\'s incredible. Words can not explain the sheer size NFTs can take, they are nothing but a drop in the massive ocean that they will eventually be. So while right now we have some millionair here and there, eventually millionaires will be the norm, with a bunch of billionaires and a few trillionaires. We need to get to that point, so for now just keep trading NFTs. Buy an NFT, then sell it for more money. Simple, you just got a profit and created more mone in the process. When I sell my 186k NFT for 500k, I will have made a profit of 314k, creating that much money, and adding to the wealth of all NFTbros. The more money we earn, the more money we can spend on NFTs, and the more money we can create. Keep trading, jus keep trading over and over and over, make the movement bigger, get it to unimaginable heights, until it surpasses even the US dollar itself. In a few years, after that is done, we can stop and make strategies about how to take over the world. Raise money from all N bros, we shall all contribute towards the greater cause. Make a big pool of ethereum and NFTs, and use it to buy the biggest governments in the world: the United States, the European Union, Russia, China, India, Japan, the UK, Canada, Australia, you get the point. O course, we are not going to own the entire government, the point is to act in the shadows, like the feared Illuminati. Take control of what laws are created and removed, manipulate big organizations, put NFTbros in positions of power of big companies like Google Microsoft, Amazon, etc. We could even take over BlackRock and Vanguard, and push NFTs further to the public. We have the potential to control everything. Big tech, big pharma, governments, the economy, global politics, EVERYTHING. If the Illuminati don\\'t exist, we wil become them, and if they do we will overthrow them. Nothing will get in our way once we get enough traction. This plan is flawless, and will give the #NFT community unfathomable power. It\\'s easy, the world moves because of money, so we will control the money, an therefore control the world. Once we have everything under control, we can start imposing our own laws. Make it mandatory for every tech company to check the blockchain every time someone wants to take a screenshot, and if there is an NFT in it, don\\'t take it. Same fo right click and save, check the blockchain every time, and don\\'t give the option if it\\'s already an NFT. That alone will almost entirely make sure there are no more unfortunate #rightclickvictim s. Of course, there will always be hackers, and they will find a way t copy NFTs, so every website must also implement algorithms to not allow anyone to post NFTs, or images that are extremely similar to an existing NFT, to avoid having a hacker change a couple pixels and upload it. Since we will also control the law, we can just pa laws to enforce it, and confiscate the NFTs of those who break the law. For hackers who find ways to steal NFTs bypassing the screenshot and right click save prevention mechanisms, we will give them from 10 years to life in prison, unless they delete the stolen NFT an give the owner back as much value as was stolen by paying with other NFTs. Naturally, I don\\'t expect things to be this simple, so when all this happens we will take our time to think about proper punishments, but as a rough draft it\\'s excellent. It\\'s proper of society based on NFTs, the future. And I am not a tyrant, I will not have my wife imprisoned for not believing in me, it\\'s not her fault that she has been brainwashed into believing fiat is better than NFTs. In fact, I will be waiting for her with open arms. One da she will realize this is the work of genius, not insanity, and she will come running at me, asking for forgiveness. Of course, I will forgive her, since I\\'m not a tyrant as I said earlier. I will allow her to marry me again, in fact. I am an honest, loyal man. Even i thousands of women were thirsting for me and my wealth of NFTs, (and there will be), I only have eyes for my beautiful wife, who has been corrupted by the greed of centralized fiat currency, which is forcing shut the beautiful potential of an NFT powered world. It\\'s not just about the world, and poverty and hunger, I need to save my wife and my children by any means necessary. But I also see some people talking about how NFTs and ethereum are bad for the environment. Look, I can\\'t deny it, I don\\'t even know why they are so bad f the environment, for all I know they could be 99% of the carbon emissions, but I also have a solution for that. When everyone has finally embraced NFTs, all screenshotters and right click savers have been stopped, fiat has been overthrown, currency has been complete decentralized, and everyone is free and happy, we can just pay scientists to figure out how to stop global warming and how to make NFTs and ethereum more environmentally friendly. Maybe they can even come up with a way to make NFTs reduce the carbon emissions, wh knows! We will also be able to plant more trees and remove more sea trash than Mr Beast could ever dream of. He\\'s only a millionaire, while the NFT economy will eventually reach the quintillions easily. Not only will NFTs stop being bad for the environment, but the will in fact become way way better than fiat because of all of this. There\\'s no point in comparing fiat to the future of crypto, and it will be so obvious to everyone in the future. But of course, for now we are marginalized, our belongings are stolen, we are ridicul on Twitter, just because we are early to the next era. Think of how people were annoyed with Socrates just because he was one of the fathers of philosophy. Does that mean he was insane? No, he was a genius. He is now one of the most famous historical figures. His wor has been studied for millenia by many different cultures. This will be the case for NFTs too. Right now we sound insane, making bold claims about earning money, and making the world a better place, but you will see. The future is practically written at this point. NF will NOT be stopped or hindered by anything. Even if blood is shed, even if families are broken, even if the world crumbles because of the downfall of fiat, nothing will stop us. Everything will be fixed and back to normal once everyone embraces crypto, and especiall NFTs. The #NFTrevolution will wait for nobody. Do you not realize that crypto is decentralized? Nobody can control crypto, it\\'s truly free, it can not be tracked, and it\\'s completely anonymous. It\\'s unbelievable people are still trying to stay with fiat. Fiat is t absolute worst, and I am sick of it. I might even stop using fiat altogether after I get back enough money to pay back the loan I took for the 186k dollar NFT, and then go on to buy more expensive NFTs with the profits. Of course, I will need someone to buy it fo say, 500k first, but that\\'s fine. Eventually someone will come and buy it. The bigger problem is all these screenshotters and right click savers stealing my NFT. The more copies there are, the more widely available it is, and the less valuable it becomes. Please, fi people, stop. From the bottom of my heart, please, I ask you to stop now. I don\\'t want to hurt anyone, but if you keep stealing NFts you are giving me no other option. If you keep going down this path, maybe I will have to jail you myself in the future for hackin devices to be able to steal NFTs. Please, stop now, realize that what you are doing is wrong and hindering the progress of humanity. Future generations will thank you for understanding. Especially all the youtubers trying to hinder NFTs and crypt like u/OrdinaryGamers and u/coffeebreak_YT . Please, you are not busting scams, you are busting the currencies of the future, and quite honestly, you are also busting my balls. Influencers and youtubers should move the world TOWARDS crypto, not AWAY from crypto. Ther are no "crypto scams", there are only failed crypto projects. And why do they fail? Because the world is ruled by fiat. How are doge, shiba inu, squid game token, save the kids, etc supposed to succeed? They are constantly facing criticism from every side, and then yo also criticize them when they inevitably fail because the developers are stressed out. You should be ashamed of yourselves. Making fun of influencers who just want their fans to ride the NFT wave early because they appreciate them. I think these detective youtube are just jealous because they will never be as successful as the future NFT traders because they are afraid of losing fiat money, so they see it as "risky". Do they even know anything about economics? I would ask how they are allowed to spit misinformation, but th again, maybe they are brainwashed like my wife. But still, history will see them as villain, and that can not be stopped. Although even considering that, SomeOrdinaryGamers is dangerous. He goes on the deep web, hacks videogames with "virtual machines" and plays wit computer viruses for fun. Please NFTbros, be careful not to let your NFTs be stolen. Even if right now all it takes to steal an NFT is having no morals, when we control all major governments and pass pro-NFT laws (see my proposals above), only skilled hackers will able to copy NFTs, and SomeOrdinaryGamers looks pretty dangerous. Please NFTbros, don't be deceived by their words, especially SomeOrdinaryGamer's. Maybe it was him who deceived my wife into believing fiat is better than crypto. That makes sense. She likes to watc youtube sometimes, so maybe that's it. Or maybe it was the kids, they are always watching youtube. I really don't trust these guys now, they look like a danger to the future crypto society that we are trying to build. Please NFTbros, do NOT watch SomeOrdinaryGamers Coffeezilla, they must have a plan to steal your NFTs, or promote screenshotting or right click saving. DO NOT FALL FOR IT. Or it may also be possible that they have no idea what they are talking about, but why risk it? Just don't engage i conversation with them, don show them your NFTs, don't show them your crypto. #nftjustice will be served when they are put in jail for their crimes against humanity, that is, preventing the progress of the entire world. I will make sure myself they are prosecuted when the pro-NFT laws are pass for the entire world. If possible, I will be the judge or the prosecutor. I will show my wife that I am willing to do anything for her. Maybe she doesn't realize it now, but I am trying to save her. She just doesn't understand my intentions. I love her so so so and it pains me to watch her being dragged down by the outdated centralized currency mindset. It's just, why? Why can't you see that this is for our own good? And for the good of the entire world? She doesn't even let me explain. Why is it so bad to take a loan to b a lazylions NFT for 186k USD? Fiat is worthless, it's outdated. Once the NFT plan (see above) starts taking form, fiat will be worth less than dirt, and we will be billionaires, maybe even among the lucky few trillionaires and we will be spearheading the #nftrevolutio Why is it so hard for so many people to see the truth? It's not rocket science, it's just basic modern economy. But she keeps ignoring me and she is in her parents' house, so I can't get a chance to explain the economics of this buiness. Actually this may be worth shot: please honey, if you see this come back, I miss you so much, please don't divorce me, I will give you a massage every day, I will try to get along better with your parents, I will stop leaving the toilet lid open and I will learn to cook for you. I will treat you10 like a princess, and we can be rich together, but please come back, this house doesn't feel full without you and the children. I feel my sanity decreasing by the moment since you left, please please I beg you, I just need to explain to you that the 186k USD loan wil be paid EASILY as soon as I get to sell the NFT. Honey I love you, you know it, please come back, don't let centralized fiat currency break our marriage. I promise that if you stick with me, you will see wonders. You will see how the NFT and crypto communities tak over currency and drive fiat to the ground, but you have to trust me. And if even then you don't decide to trust me until it actually happens, please please don't tell the children lies about me. You know I only want the best for them. I know if you fight for custo you will win because the judge won't be able to look past the fiat currency to see the future of NFTs, so please let me just ask you to see them every once in a while. I don't think I can live without them, this house doesn't feel like a home anymore without you an the kids, I don't want to live like this forever. And I know I won't, because I will be a billionaire from NFTs, but I have to admit even decentralized crypto and NFTs can't buy love. I only love you, I really can't replace you. Just know that when I am rich in th future and have hundreds of rich billionaire NFTbros and many women are drooling all over me, I will know deep in my heart that they only want my money, unlike you. You have been here for 5 years, before I become an NFT billionaire. If you don't come back to me now just know that I will always be ready to welcome you back home. But anyways, let's get back to business. I'm wondering, should we get Elon Musk to help the NFT community? He has been involved in bitcoin and doge before, so maybe it's worth a shot. Are there any NFTbro who are friends with Elon? If so, I think we should give him a few NFTs and slowly convince him that he should invest in NFTs if he wants to pass Jeff Bezos in net worth forever. He's a pretty cool guy, so I'm sure he won't be too against the idea. We just have shill shill shill and shill more until he buys and tweets about it. It will be so funny seeing all the NFT screenshotters and right click savers crying as soon as Elon starts shilling lazy lions, bored apes or cryptopunks. There is even an Elon Musk NFT collection ou there, maybe he will be more open to shilling NFTs if we show it to him. Imagine the first NFT funded space mission. Maybe even the first human on Mars could be NFT funded. Something like that would be international news for years, I think it's really worth it. basically, if any NFTbros are willing to convince Elon Musk to shill for NFTs, please do it immediately, there is no time to waste. Hey, while writing this I'm getting a message from my wife. She says she has decided she wants to divorce me. So it's really happenin huh. I guess that's it, I'll have to do as much as I can to push NFTs forward so she will eventually marry me again. Maybe saving the marriage is impossible right now. But I understand. I am angry and sad, very sad, but I understand that if I thought centralized fia was good, I would also be weirded out by a 186k deposit for what seems to be just an image. Of course it's not just an image, it's an NFT, but she doesn't understand it yet. She deserves understanding, not anger. I understand what she is going through, and eventual I will show her that this is not a horrible financial decision worth ending the marriage over, but exactly the opposite. An utterly genius financial decision that will mark the future for generations to come. The ultimate display of technological advancement, t possibility to own digital assets. The future is now, and it will only get better from here. I have said it multiple times, but this is the beginning of a new era of humanity, the next step of evolution. So what if I spent 186k USD on an NFT of a lion? It will eas be worth millions in the future and I will pay back the bank loan with no difficulty. And the bank will go bankrupt anyway when they realize fiat is worthless compared to NFTs. I could eventually buy the bank and reform it to deal with NFTs and crypto instead of filt centralized fiat. By the way, did you know there's a company called Fiat? I think it would be very funny if NFTbros bought it and rebranded it to Crypto. That would be an interesting power move and would teach screenshotters and right click savers to not mess with us I think I will do that when I become an NFT billionaire, yeah. We have to expand our influence as far as possible, and then more. It looks like in 2018 they were worth around 100 billion USD. I think we will be able to buy them with 10 to 20 average priced NFTs in t future, after the plan above has reached at least the first step. We will be able to drive in Crypto cars if we actually do that. Drive in Crypto cars to the white house, buy ourselves positions in the government, bribe politicians with NFTs to make pro-NFT laws, et you know how it goes, but all while driving in cool Crypto cars, instead of puny Fiat cars. The only problem is that Crypto cars will far overshadow Tesla if we do this, and Elon Musk will be our ally, so that could make him depressed. Maybe we should instead buy Fia rename it to Crypto, and then give the company away to Elon Musk so he can make it a child company of Tesla or something. We can easily afford that, it's not a big deal if we give away a 100 billion USD company to our dear friend who will have helped us in our journey NFTs of that kind of value will be traded like pokemon cards among the upper middle class of the future NFT based society, it's not a big deal. Bigger and more important targets are Google, Microsoft, Apple, Amazon, Netflix, Facebook (not Meta), etc. We need to buy of big tech if we want to make sure they make it as hard as possible to screenshot, right click save, or slightly edit NFTs, or whatever other methods hackers can ever come up with. But I think we can buy the entirety of wall street to be honest. What are they going do when fiat becomes useless? One kinda big NFT will be enough to buy huge percentages of the stock of any company. They just will not be able to resist the offers. Wall street runs on investors spending money in lots of companies, so let's go to wall street absolutely and utterly outinvest everyone that gets in our way. That's how we get NFTbros in big positions of huge companies. Buy, buy, buy your way to the top. The world has been working like that since forever, so don't feel bad. It's just a change in currency, an change in who holds the power. As long as we don't do anything unethical, everything will be fine, everyone will be happier and richer, and big humanitarian problems like poverty and world hunger will be completely extinguished. And of course climate change after fund scientists to find lots of ways to make NFTs more environmentaly friendly and more efficient. This can only go right pretty much. I can't see a flaw in any part of the plan. We will succeed no matter what the screenshotters and right click savers think of us, rise NFTbros, don't let your spirit be crushed by the brainwashed sheep who don't understand the genius economics behind decentralized crypto and NFTs, they think the blockchain is evil. Don't pay them any attention, most of them are just lost in this world of rapi change, and the few who never accept NFTs and keep trying to steal them after the rest of the world realizes that NFTs will save us, will be prosecuted and jailed for theft. Come on guys, just push forward, towards a world for NFTbros, by NFTbros. We shall not anything bring us down. No matter how much people on twitter try to tell you that NFTs have no value, keep your head up and fight. There is no need to argue with fiat sheep. They will eventually realize the value of NFTs when everyone is making money thanks to them. fact, hasn't the IRS already realized that? They are taxing NFTs now. Don't worry about it NFTbros, no matter how much they tax us, if we follow the plan described above, we will still get so rich that even the IRS won't be able to compete with us. Then we bribe t IRS to put NFTbros in high positions of power and stop taxing NFTs and crypto. Then with that the growth of crypto and NFTs will be even greater, and we cam easily move into step 2 where we bribe all the governments to give NFTbros more positions of power and make p NFT laws, etc. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING will stop the growth of NFTs. Anything short of a nuclear war will NOT be enough, and we can easily get rid of nuclear weapons when we get to the power positions, so don't worry about it. A world of NFTs is a world of peace freedom, virtual ownership and practically unlimited wealth. Maybe some fiat sheep are jealous of our achievements and riches, and that's fine, if I wasn't brave enough to take a 186k USD bank loan to buy my NFT, I would be jealous of the courage of NFTbros too. Su admirable and brave souls, working for the greater good, and not for their own greed, like most of the fiat based world. Especially Elon Musk, he is one of the most successful in fiat, but he will still be willing to help NFTs and decentralized crypto if that's what takes to make the world a perfect utopia with no greed. Such courage makes me cry tears of joy. Elon Musk will be one of the mightiest NFTbros ever, there is no question about it. It's expremely important we get him to shill for as many NFTs as possible right now. earlier NFTs become a global phenomenon, the more people will be saved from fiat greed. For example, Amazon employees. Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk's eternal rival, is one of the biggest villains in this world. Not only is he the second richest person, but he treats workers like shit. Wake up, Amazon workers, once you realize that NFTs are the future, you could even surpass Jeff Bezos himself in wealth once the future NFT society starts to take shape. It's only a matter of time until he is dethroned and left in the dust by t of thousands of future NFTbros. There will be no mercy against the fiat shillers, they shall be treated similarly to screenshotters and right click savers and the hackers who will try to find ways to copy NFTs even with the technological restrictions. That's why E Musk and his knowledge of decentralized crypto and NFTs are essential. Currently he is one of the few who can fight the government and Jeff Bezos. If you don't understand the importance of this mission, don't worry, just stop screenshotting and right click sav NFTs, and everything will be made clear as society starts to accept and embrace cryptocurrencies and NFTs as they should be. There is nothing to lose, there are only wins ahead of us. Even if your family starts to think you are crazy, even if your wife leaves you a tries to take the children, don't worry, this is a long term investment, the ultimate long term invetment in fact. My wife wants to divorce me and take the children, but I have nothing to fear. Sure, I may be scared, I may be angry, I may be sad, but none of thi matters. All that truly matters is the future I envision where NFTs will bring everyone together and abolish poverty. When that is done, my wife will finally see the true worth of everything I have been doing these past days, the sacrifices, my vision for the futur all of it will finally make sense and she will come back to me, and I will be able to laugh with my children again. None of this will be in vain, just you wait. Karen, my beautiful wife, please, if you are reading this, reconsider now, I am completely serious, don' take the kids please. But if you don't understand yet, that's fine, you will eventually, and I will welcome you back home with open arms. After all, there can be no revolution without sacrificing something. But I am determined. This is my path in life, and I will ta it. I will not be the first or the last to sacrifice my own happiness for a revolution that will bring more happiness to future generations. But this is only the beginning. I have only spent 186k USD on an NFT. As soon as someone buys it for a price of 500k o million, the magnitude of my contributions will only skyrocket. I will buy as many NFTs as possible. So many that eventually the default way to measure value won't be centralized fiat currencies like dollars, but decentralized cryptocurrencies like #etheriu #bitcoin, #dogecoin and #NFTs . I can only dream of such a world, but I won't have to for long. It is coming, and it's coming fast. Despite all the jealousy, the fiat shillers, the centralized banks and the brainwashed sheep, I will keep going, and I hope NFTbros w keep marching towards the future. We were intended to revolutionize the economy, that is our purpose in life, and we MUST fulfill it. Don't give in to your current desires, keep pumping NFTs, keep buying and selling, keep trading, keep making the economy bigger. day you will be able to sit back with thousands of multi billion dollar NFTs under your name, and you will be proud to have been part of something bigger. The true future of humanity. True freedom worldwide, true happiness, a true utopia with no greed and centralized fiat. But don't get lazy now, we don't live in an NFT utopia yet, that is something we have to work towards. Are there any world leaders who are pro NFT? Maybe we could start our influence by making a decentralized cryptocurency the main currency o country, and then it would be easier for other countries to follow their steps. I think it's not very unlikely that out of so many presidents and so many monarchies at least one would be willing to shill for NFTs on twitter. We should try to find them first in economies like the United States, The European Union, Russia, China, Japan, the UK... because if we can get one of the big economies to entirely or partially turn to crypto and NFTs, we will already have a big player in the NFT revolution. However, if none of them a willing to accept NFTs yet, we should start in developing countries. I think India would be a good idea. Recently their access to their internet has been skyrocketing and their population is close to that of China. India seems like a good place to start shilling NF Are any indian NFTbros willing to shill NFTs and cryptocurrencies to your political leaders? I don't know much about india other than the fact that samosas are damn delicious, so I will leave it up to you indian NFTbros. Maybe we could try to influence the Europea Union. Instead of trying to switch them all at once, we could start getting some countries like Greece into crypto and NFTs so that they can finally pay off their debt. Then more countries will slowly start ditching the euro and start switching to NFTs, and in the e the entire European Union will be forced to adapt to this change. I think this is easier than trying to change the leaders of the European Union and then getting them to change all the countries to NFTs. We could also try this with the United States. Instead changing the entire country to NFTs and crypto in one go, we can change one state, then another state, then another state, and the more states that are changed, the easier it will be for other states to ditch the dollar. Then as a bonus Canada would probably swi to NFTs too, so that's nice. Also we should try to get twitter itself to shill for NFTs. Who better to shill NFTs on twitter than the company itself? Half of twitter would instantly become NFTbros easily. Why has nobody thought of this? They can be of great help the crypto and NFT revolution. Same with Facebook (Meta now). They would be a great help in getting boomers into crypto and NFTs, since they believe anything they find on facebook, so we might as well use it for something actually useful. And with the Metaver coming, digital ownership will be EXTREMELY important. We will be able to merge the real world with the virtual world when crypto and NFTs become the main currencies everywhere as described in my plan above. Also in the future we will colonize Mars, which me will NEED to use crypto and NFTs. Are you going to pay someone 5 dollars from the Earth to Mars? How? The rocket is worth millions, are you sure sending bills between planets is a good idea? But crypto? It's not physical! Just pay them in Bitcoin, and boom, you ar saving yourself millions for a puny 5 dollars. And for big payments you can use NFTs, of course. In the future the richest people will have most of their wealth in NFTs, just like right now they have it in stocks. And then they will have some crypto that they can to pay for normal stuff. It's a solid way of building an economy, when will the masses realize it? There is no future for fiat, just switch to crypto and NFTs already. Especially my wife, please, Karen, just listen to me. It's not that hard to understand I promise All you have to do is trust me. It's not even that much in the long term, soon someone will buy the 186k USD NFT I got for maybe 500k or even 1 million. It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when. But you just won't let me explain. If you listened, you wou realize that a 186k USD bank loan is not a big deal, we can cover it easily with the profits from NFT investing. And you could help me too if you don't divorce me. Please stop thinking about divorce, I will not drive this family to the ground, I will only elevate i to the heavens by spearheading the #NFTrevolution. We can be billionaires, and we can help the world. But you have to stop and listen to me for a moment. Please Karen, just listen, I think you are being irrational, but I still love you too much to let you rui yourself over this. NFTs are the future. NFTbros are everywhere already, shilling for NFTs all day long. Soon we will even have Elon Musk in our side, don't you see? The revolution is already starting. Why would screenshotters and right click savers be so jealous us otherwise? It's because we are making too much money and they are insecure about their puny fiat. Please stop being irrational, let's talk this out. Come back home, and bring the kids too. It's really lonely in here without any of you. But if you don't come ba don't think I will stop my quest towards a better world. I know that sacrifice is necessary. Maybe I'm just trying to remove the necessary sacrifice in vain, but it's worth a shot. I shoudn't feel too bad though, I know you will eventually come back, but I wou rather you come back now than after the entire world has acknowledged NFTs and crypto. You can be in the good side of history starting now. But it's your choice, and I won't force you. If you think opposing crypto and NFTs is the correct thing to do, so be it, remember I will always love you, and I won't shame you in the future for making a mistake. I understand what you are going through. So yeah, tldr: We NFTbros are unstoppable, NFTs and cryptocurrencies are already booming, but we need to keep going. Buy NFTs for higher price than you found them online, and then sell them for an even higher price. It's really simple. The previous owner makes money, you make money, and then the new owner will make money when someone else buys it for a higher price. If we keep doing that ov and over, new money will be created everytime someone gets profit, and NFTs will be worth more and more, which will lead the entire NFT community to be worth bilions, trillions, quadrillions, and eventually quintillions. The more money you make, the more you c spend, which means you can create even more money. We will surpass every centralized fiat currency with our decentralized cryptos and NFTs. Millionaires will be the norm, many will even be billionaires, and some will even be trillionaires. Once that's done, we focus on collecting crypto and NFTs to bribe the major governments like the United States, Russia, China, the European Union, etc into putting NFTbros in positions of power, stop taxing crypto and NFTs, and make pro NFT laws against copying NFTs. Also we will pretty much all of wall street, turn all of blackrock and vanguard to NFTs instead of their current assets, and buy Google, Amazon, Microsoft, Apple and such companies and make their technology check if a screenshot has an NFT in it by checking the blockchain, and it does, then don't take the screenshot. Same with right click saving, don't give the option if it's an NFT. And we will make sure all websites implement algorithms to make sure nobody uploads NFTs or a slightly modified NFT other than the owner of the NFT. And the will be hackers trying to steal NFTs by other complex means, of course, but we can jail them or make them pay for their crimes. Then once it's all done, fiat will finally die, everyone will have money, there will be no poverty or hunger, and we can all come togeth to solve important problems like global warming. Some people say that NFTs are very bad for the enviroment, so we can just fund scientists to make NFTs more efficient and better for the environment. And we can also buy lots of trees to plant and machines to remo trash from the ocean. And even if your family thinks you are crazy, don't worry, just wait and see how the #nftrevolution will change their minds. My wife thinks I'm crazy, but that won't be enough to lead me away from NFTs. I know their worth and their potential Even if she divorces me and takes the kids away, I know she will eventually understand. The 186k USD bankloan is worth it if it was for an NFT investment. But I understand not everyone is aware of the potential of NFTs yet. Anyway, I'm sorry if this thread was a bit long, I just wanted to explain a couple things about NFTs.#nftart #NFT #NFTs #NFTCommmunity #nftrevolution #cryptocurrecy #cryptocurrency #CryptoNews #RightClickVictim #RightClickProtection #rightclicksave #ETH #etherium #Bitcoin #dogecoin #dogelon #SHIB #shibainu

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r3z71w

yo what is up you guys😳right now were at mcdonalds 🍟and it is currently 3 in the morning ⏰😈👺👹👿🤡👻💀☠️👽💩 and we just found out when you come to mcdonalds 🍟🍔🌭🧆🍔🍟🍔🍟at 3 in the morning ⏰😈👿😈👿👿👺👹👿😈👺👿👹🤡💩 you could order the among us 😳😳😳😳⛔️📛📛🆘🅾️🚫happy meal you guys thats right you heard me the among us happy meal 🍟🍔🍔🍔👿☠️👽💩 and theres a toy 🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸inside of among us 😳😳😳😳⛔️😳⛔️😳⛔️😳⛔️😳📛⛔️📛📛📛📛🆘🅾️🚫 it can either be a crewmate or it could be an impostor 😳😳😳😳 and if you guys do not know what among us 😳😳😳😳⛔️😳⛔️😳⛔️😳⛔️😳📛⛔️📛📛📛📛🆘🆘🅾️is you must be living under a rock🪨 🪨 🪨 🪨 🪨 🪨 you guys this game is insane okay so you can play with a bunch of friends okay like 8 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎i think 🤔🤔🧐you can play with up to 10 people😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎 you can play with and theres impostors 😳😳😳😳⛔️😳⛔️😳⛔️😳⛔️😳📛⛔️📛📛📛📛🆘 and theres crewmates and pretty much the impostor 😳😳😳😳⛔️😳⛔️😳⛔️😳⛔️ try to sabotage the whole game and try to win its insane you guys once again this video is not sponsored at all but this game 😳😳😳😳⛔️😳⛔️😳⛔️😳⛔️ is insane so we got so excited because we love the game and we found out the mcdonalds 🍟🍔🍔 offering an among us happy meal 🍟🍔😳⛔️😳 and theres a toy 🧸🧸🧸inside but supposedly when you get this happy meal 🍟🍔🍔🍟🌭🧆🍔🧆🍔🍟🍔🍔 you guys something scary 😦😦😦😦😦😦😦and weird🤮🤕🤒🤧happens with the impostor 😳🅾️🆘⛔️📛👿😈😭🚫👽☠️💀now i dont really believe it but these videos ▶️▶️▶️▶️▶️▶️ive been seeing on youtube ▶️▶️▶️▶️▶️▶️have been insane⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️ so thats why were here right now were gonna go to the drive thru and were gonna order the among us 😔😔😔😔😳😔😔😳😳😳😳happy meal 🍔🍟🍔🍟but i need everyone to like 👍👍👍👍 this video▶️▶️▶️▶️▶️▶️ if your excited okay like this video with your knuckles right now just smash👊👊🤕🤕🤕, hit the like button 👊👊👊👊👍👍super hard guys and count it to 3 seconds 🕰🕰🕰i wanna see you guys do it cus i cant do it and nicole cant do it (i cant) no one can like 👍👍👍👍the video with their 👊👊👊👊👊👊knuckles so lets see if you guys can do it in 3 seconds, 3, 2, 1, GASP 😱😱😱😱😱they can do it (oh my god) you guys if you do it comment down below ⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿and also leave comments down 👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿below if you ever played among us😳🆘📛🅾️😳😳😳😱😔😔or if you know anything about impostors😳🆘⛔️😳😱😦😔, crewmates or among us alone 😔😔😔🆘😳and we’ll shout you out in the next video so thank you guys so much for leaving awesome comments😍😚😙🥰😍😋😘😗 all the singe time its amazing, but without further ado were already here and were gonna go to the drive thru 🚗🚕🚓🏎🛻🚚🚒🚒🚜🚎and were gonna get this among us happy meal 😳😱😔📛🅾️🆘⛔️😳😳😳😳its gonna be insane you guys im super excited, alright here we go guys oh my god theres literally no one here😦😦😦😦😦😦😦😦🆘 (i know) i mean 3 in the morning 🕒🕒🕒🕒🤡👺👹😈😈💩👻💀☠️👽👽whos really coming to mcdonalds🍟🍕🍔🌭🍗 (yeah) alright you guys moment of truth i dont see it on the sign 🪧 🪧🪧🪧🪧though (i know i dont see anything about it) (mcdonald man noises) hi um can i get the uh the among us😳happy meal 🍔🍟toy uh happy meal 🍔🍟with a cheese burger 🍔no pickles (mcdonald man noises) yeah and then um, um uh can i get the orange 🟠🔶🔸uh high c or no (mcdonald man noises) oh french fries 🍟🍟🍕🌭🍟(mcdonald man noises) thats it (mcdonald man noises) alright (GASPS 😱😱😦😱😱no way) they actually have it (no way, no freaking way) they actually have it (dude no way😱😱😱😱😱, no way) alright im putting mask 😷😷😷on guys (ok) dont show the light 💡 💡💡💡💡(ok ok) yeah (ok) hey (mcdonald man noises) ooh okay cool😎👌🏿 , oh oh oh ooh😯😯😯😯😮, (thats crazy) yo guys i wonder how come its not decorative though (i know wth) theyre trying to probably keep it low-key that no one 1️⃣1️⃣1️⃣🚫knows cuz u could only get it at 3 in the morning 🕒🕒🕒🕒🕒🕒🕒you guys (yeah, so its like some sort of secret menu✅✅✅✅🚫❌ item) it has to be secret ✅✅menu✅✅✅✅🚫❌❌❌ (yeah) oh my god (oh my god) i really thought hes gonna say no like they dont have 🤷‍♀️🤷🤷‍♂️it i thought they didnt exist (i know, i know) cuz he wouldve said something (yeah) cool 😎👌🏿thank you, oh my god😇😇😇 (oh my god guys) you guys (we actually got it) the among us 😳😦😱🆘happy meal🍕🌭🍗 you guys (dude this is so cool😎😎😎😎😎) okay 👍👍👍👍👍you guys, were gonna head back ➡️➡️➡️➡️home🏡🏡🏡, open this up and see whats inside of it (alright you guys were home 🏡🏡🏡now and im like ready to feast 🤤🤤🤤on this thing 🍟🌭🍗🍕and i also really wanted to know whats inside) yeah you guys this is going to be insane😮😮😮, imagine getting the among us 😳🆘happy meal🍕🍟🍗🌭 from mcdonalds🍟🍟🍟 (i know) cuz i know they had a travis scott 👨🏿👌🏿👌🏿👌🏿meal (uh huh) and the j balvin 👨‍🦱🤙(yeah) but the among us 😳🆘❌😔 happy meal (i think that is so much cooler 😎😎👌🏿👌🏿👌🏿😳🆘honestly) this is gonna be insane once again you could only get this item at 3 am🕒🕒🕒🕒🕒 (yeah) and it is a secret 😯😯😯😯menu item guys (yeah) so im super glad 😇😇😇😇that they did not sell 📶📶📶out when were there but nicole this is gonna be creepy 😰😰😰😰😥😥😥you know how among us 😳😳😳😳is its freaky man (it is kinda freaky) if you guys never played among us 😳😳😳😳😳the game 😳😳😳😳😳😳it gets very like demonic😈😈😈😈👿👿👿👹👹👹👺👺 (it does sometimes) very weird😧😧😧😧😧 (yeah) so im kinda freaking😧😧😧😧😧 out i really wonder 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔what kind of toys 🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸in it (i know) but lets just stop ✋✋✋✋✋✋🛑🛑🛑talking and just get right➡️➡️➡️➡️➡️➡️ into it you guys everyone 🚻🚻🚻🚻🚻🚻🚻like 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍this video ▶️▶️▶️▶️▶️right ➡️➡️➡️➡️➡️now okay we have to get 30 thousand likes👍👍👍👍👍right ➡️➡️➡️➡️now if your excited i wanna see if you guys😎 are excited 😃😃😃😃😃right ➡️➡️➡️➡️➡️now so like👍👍👍👍👍👍 the video ▶️▶️▶️▶️so we could open this 😃😃😃up (ooh😯😯) okay so like 👍👍👍👍👍the video ▶️▶️▶️▶️right now (oh my gosh😀😀😀) alright nicole you ready (im ready😃😃😃😃) alright here we go open it up (okay 👍👍👍okay👍👍👍 ready) lets see whats inside of it (wait three, two, one, ew🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤢) what what (what the heck) what (dude😰😰😰😰 i cant do that im im not gonna eat that) what (ew 🤮🤮🤮🤮im not gonna do that) what (you look at this look at this look at this) what the heck is that (so disgusting🤢🤢🤢) you know what you’re here grab the camera grab the camera📷📷📷📷📸 (what the heck, i know its 3 am 🕒🕒🕒🕒🕒but come on thats disgusting🤢🤢 you cant give that to people) if your giving this to kids 👦👦👦👦👦👦they’re gonna get sick🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢 (yeah👍👍👍👍👍) from this (especially like right now like during everything thats going on in the world🌍🌍🌍🌍 like why would you put something nasty🤢🤢🤢🤢 all over a kid’s👦👦👦 like meal🍟🍟🍟🍟 a kid’s meal, what is that and theres like no fries🍟🍟🍟🍟🚫🚫 even in there) wheres all the fries🍟🍟❓❓ (theres like no food 🚫🚫okay) eww 🤮🤮🤮🤮look at this (ew 🤮🤮🤮what does it smell🤢🤢🤢🤢 like) i think its blood 🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸(what wait are you serious what does it smell like) the french fry smells really strong🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮 on this but i think its (what the heck wait what else is even in there did they actually give you your burger🍔🍔🍔🍔) this is not an among us 😳😳😳😳toy🧸🧸🧸 (what is it what the heck) what is this (what is that) and theres more blood🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸 all over it too (ew🤮🤮🤮🤮) look at this (oh my god, oh my god this is so disgusting🤢🤢🤢🤢) oh its a mouse trap🐀🐀🐀🐀🪤🪤🪤🪤🐀🐀🐀🐀 (really, ohh) is it (its supposed to be like a trap 🪤🪤🪤🪤from among us 😳😳😳😳or what) yeah👍👍👍 cuz among us😳 they have a bunch of like like tra- you can get trapped 🪤🪤🪤🪤🪤into the little um the rooms that they have like the electronical ⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️room and everything like that dude (well why would they put that in a kids 👦👦👦👦meal 🍔🍔🍔🍟🍟thats literally dangerous🚫🚫🚫⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️) is it hold on let me see👀👀👀👀 because i remember🤔🤔🤔🤔 (does that actually work) i dont know 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️because i remember🤔🤔🤔🤔 i used one of these 🪤🪤🪤🪤🪤one time maybe it could be like a toy🧸🧸🧸🧸🪤🪤🪤 i dont (maybe its a fake one) i dont know 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️if this (oh my god😱😱😱😱, oh my god 😱😱😱😱😱😱oh my god 😱😱😱😱did it really close on you, oh my god 😱😱😱😱😱edward, oh my god is your finger 👆👆👆👆okay) ow 🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕(oh my god 😱😱😱😱did it break your finger👆👆👆👆) no no no not at all im okay👍👍👍👍👍👍 (are you sure that thing came down hard) owww🤕🤕🤕🤕 (that thing came down so hard) i i i thought😰😰😰😰😰😰 (you’re shaking) i thought it was just like a be like like a fake toy 🧸🧸🧸🪤🪤🪤🪤or something oww🤕🤕🤕🤕 (oh my god😱😱😱😱 oh my god 😱😱😱😱😱are you okay) damn it😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 (are you sure its not broken) no no no im okay👍👍👍👍 but now we know for sure its real🪤🪤 though (oh my god😱😱😱😱) oww🤕🤕🤕🤕😭😭 (dude oh my god😱😱😱😱 please be careful😩😩😩😩😩 i dont know 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️what else is in there so please please freaking be careful😩😩😩😩🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺😩😩😣😣😣😣) you guys like👍👍👍👍👍 the video right now if you’re excited😃😃😃😃😃 to see what else😯😯😯😯 is in here man this is nasty🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢 (this is horrible🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮) like👍👍👍👍👍👍 the video guys three two one theres more blood🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸 on this (okay at this point im not even surprised😒😒😒😒😒😒) it looks so dry though (are you are you really going to open that😣😣😣😣😖😖😖) well they want to see it😠😠😠😠😠😠 (i dont know dude🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ i think its really gross🤮🤮🤮🤢🤢🤢 i think your going to make yourself sick🤒🤒🤒🤒🤒 opening that, what the heck is even in there) ewww🤮🤮🤮🤮🤢🤢🤢🤢 (what is it, what is that eww🤮🤮🤮🤢🤢what is that thing sticking out of it😖😖😖😖😖) what the f- 🤬🤬🤬im sorry for my language 🤬🤬what the f 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬is this (dude oh my god theres a freaking bite 🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌out of it too dude this is so freaking unsanitary 🤮🤮🤮🤮what is that😫😫😫, what is that😖😖😖) i dont know🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ (what the heck) its a tomato🍅🍅🍅🍅 (with a) with a bone🦴🦴🦴🦴🦴 (sticking out of it) ohh 😮😮😮😮they’re trying to mimic you know when you find like a dead body😵😵😵😵😵😵😵😵😵 in the room (yeah) you know how theres like a bone🦴🦴🦴🦴🦴🦴 sticking out of the body😵😵😵😵😵 (what the heck) its like if theyre like trying to report🎙🎙🎙🎙🎙 red🔴🔴🔴 (dude) like a dead body😵😵😵😵😵 should we like call📞📞📞 a meeting☎️☎️☎️☎️ or something like that (i dont know🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️) this is weird this actually feels like its real life look👀👀 at the look👀👀 at the burger🍔🍔🍔 (i really still think🧐🧐 this is gross🤮🤮🤢🤢🤢, i dont think they should do this) uuuuhhh🤮🤮🤮🤮 (dude that freaking hey the blood🩸🩸🩸🩸 on your face👨‍🦱👨‍🦱👨‍🦱) what🤨🤨🤨🤨 (be careful😣😣😣😣🥺🥺🥺🥺) oh😨😨😨😨🤧🤧🤧 (dude thats so gross🤢🤢🤢) you guys this is nasty🤢🤢🤢🤢 man ughhhhh🤮🤮🤮 knocking✊✊✊✊ (did somebody just knock✊✊✊) you guys somebody just knocked✊✊✊ in the door🚪🚪🚪🚪 right now its 3:20🕒🕒🕒🕒 in the morning now nicole there’s no way someone could knock✊✊✊✊ on the door🚪🚪🚪🚪 (dude no one ever even comes up here⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️, theres no way look👀👀👀 there look👀👀 at the people is there anyone🤨🤨🤨 there) its blocked🚫🚫🚫🚫 (its blocked🚫🚫🚫) look👀👀👀 (wait what🤨🤨🤨) somebody’s covering their hand✋✋✋✋✋ on it look👀👀👀👀 you cant see (what the heck) its blocked🚫🚫🚫 (i dont think he showed me) back up back up back up🔙🔙🔙 (how about if theres somebody there🧐🧐) shhhh🤫🤫🤫🤫 (why would they be covering it🤨🤨🤨🤨) get a little closer get a little closer just in case just in case just in case you guys wish🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 us luck🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀 in the comments right now please pray🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 for us right now this is not normal😞😞😞😞😞😞 (no theres no reason that things should be blocked🚫🚫🚫🚫🚫 two✌️✌️✌️, one👆👆👆 GASP😱😱😱😱😱 edward heavy breathing😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨) heavy breathing😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨 oh my god😱😱😱😱😱, oh my god😱😱😱😱😱😱 (whats going on, whats going on, do you see👀👀👀👀👀 anyone) you guys look👀👀👀👀👀👀 at this (what the heck) is this the among us😳😳😳😳 toy🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸 that was supposed to be in the box📦📦📦📦📦📦 (that doesnt make any sense🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️) or do you think🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 they delivered📬📬📬📬📬📬📬📬📬📬📬 it maybe they like forgot to put📥📥📥📥 in the box 📦📦📦📦📦📦📦and deliver it to our door🚪🚪🚪🚪🚪🚪 but we didnt tell🏡🏡🏡🏡 them our address (how is that possible🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️) you guys look at this (are you sure you didnt see👀👀👀 anyone) is this the impostor😳😳😳😳😳 (it looks like it ) but anybody👤👤👤👤👤 could be the impostor😳😳😳😳😳, you guys look at this they left📭📭📭📭📭 an among us🆘🆘🆘🆘🆘 toy🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸 or how about hes real😳😳😳😳😳😳😳, how about hes evil😈😈😈😈😈😈👿👿👿👿 (you think i mean its 3 am 🕒🕒🕒🕒🕒🕒🕒its literally demon👺👺👺👺👺 hours) you guys (this isnt right🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁) oh we didn’t check✅✅✅✅ the drink🍶🍶🍶🍶🍶 either (you’re right, be careful😩😩😩😩😩🥺🥺🥺 i really do i really dont think you should drink that🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️ because theres something wrong🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁 with literally everything in this meal🍔🍔🍔🍔) why is it yellow🟡🟡🟡🟡🟡🟡🟡🟡🟡 (idk what kind did you even get) ooh it smells sour like funky😣😣😣😣😣 (really) spits🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 (oh my god what is it) its pee🤢🤢🤢 (what) its pee🤮🤮🤮🤮 (are you serious) its pee😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 (oh my god, oh my god no) and i have pee🤮🤮🤮🤮in my mouth👄👄👄👄👄👄 now (oh my god dude your gonna get sick🤒🤒🤒🤒🤒, oh my god i told you not to drink that) you guys that is not normal🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁 how the heck could the among us😳😳😳😳🆘🆘🆘🆘🆘 just come randomly to our door🚪🚪🚪🚪🚪 man theres no GASPS😱😱😱😱😱 (what) where did it go, oh my god (what the heck) wasnt he i’d literally just put 📥📥📥📥📥📥📥him right there (i know wait did he fall can you check where is he is there anything there) i dont, i dont (oh oh oh my god are you okay👍👍👍👍👍) knocking✊✊✊✊✊ (GASPS😱😱😱😱😱😱 oh my god, what is going on) you guys they’re knocking✊✊✊✊ again (again) ohh my head👨‍🦱👨‍🦱👨‍🦱👨‍🦱 (okay what would that be next time time like what what could this be possibly) i dont know my head👨‍🦱👨‍🦱👨‍🦱👨‍🦱👨‍🦱👨‍🦱hurts 🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕though man, i hit my head👨‍🦱👨‍🦱👨‍🦱👨‍🦱👨‍🦱 really really hard, you guys im done✅✅✅✅✅ with this should we even answer the door🚪🚪🚪🚪🚪 (i dont think so honestly like i feel like its just gonna get even worse😈😈😈😈😈 over the door, i feel like its just gonna get more creepy😦😦😦😦😦😦) come here come here (okay okay) you guys please pray🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 for us in the comments right now like👍👍👍👍👍 the video this is were not gonna knock✊✊✊✊✊✊✊ again (idk🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️, two2️⃣, one1️⃣ GASPS😱😱😱 what the heck dude what is going on, what is going on dude) you guys now we know this freaking thing is evil😈😈😈👺👺👺👺 now (its possessed👻👻👻👻👻👻👻, that thing has to be possessed👻👻👻👻👻) theres no way i literally put📥📥📥📥📥 him right there (unless theres two2️⃣2️⃣ of them but i dont know🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️) so mcdonalds🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟 not delivering this, this is actually real then its alive its evil😈😈😈😈😈 (it has to be) you guys the video▶️▶️▶️▶️ is becoming way too long now were gonna have to end🔚🔚🔚🔚🔚 it right here and were gonna find out what should we do with this should we cut✂️✂️✂️✂️✂️ him open what should we do comment down below should we cut him open✂️✂️✂️✂️✂️, should we go back to mcdonalds🍟🍟🍟 i need you guys advice right now because this is not normal🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁 guys once again like👍👍👍👍👍the video▶️▶️▶️ guys if this was insane also leave comments down below ⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️and if you guys are not subscribed now also follow our instagram🎦🎦🎦🎦🎦 because we probably put it on our story🧑‍🏫🧑‍🏫🧑‍🏫🧑‍🏫🧑‍🏫 of what were gonna do or we’ll put it on the next video▶️▶️▶️▶️▶️ but make sure to go follow our instagram🎦🎦🎦🎦 at arcade🕹🕹 craniacs guys if you guys follow the first 500 followers we do follow you back🔙🔙🔙 so make sure to go follow our instagram🎦🎦🎦🎦 but right now were going to have to put this in a box📦📦📦📦📦 or something this is not right🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁 so we'll see you guys in the next video▶️▶️▶️▶️ man this is creepy😬😬😬😬😬😬 dude 🎥🎥🎥🎥TO BE CONTINUED🎥🎥🎥

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r3yvpn

So I was sexing my hot gf who I have lots of sex with when I fucked up today. Since I was about to cum I pulled out you know? She got ready to take my load all over her face but I came too hard because the sex was so sexy that I blew her head off like a shotgun
Edit: all of you saying this is fake can shut up. This is 1000% real and I’m dealing with a very traumatic loss right now. Stop being inconsiderate please and thank you.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r3xyys

I hadn't seen my girlfriend in a few weeks. She's been busy with life and I've been working stupid hours. Earlier today she came over, we made tea and proceeded with the love making.

Previously she had bought me "cruelty free made-by-women eco friendly non-latex super condoms", her words, not mine.

So after we had finished our romantic escapade, I freaked the fuck out because I thought the condom might have a hole in it. So I figured there was only one way to confirm this, which was to fill it full of water like some sort of sick, perverted water balloon.

She finds this hilarious and joins me in the bathroom as I proceed to wrap the tip of this Cruelty-Free Made-By-Women Eco-Friendly Non-Latex Super Condom around the faucet of my bathroom sink and fill it up.


As I gazed into this horrific snowglobe of lumpy spunk, swimming around aimlessly through this fancy pansty super condom, I quickly realized, there was no hole.

Only after I filled this atrosity to the very brim, did I realize the repurcussions of my actions. My girlfriend watched in terror as this translucent pandora's box of would-be children quickly turned into an opaque balloon of jizz.

The balloon fucking popped and shot jizz all over my bathroom. On the walls, the ceiling, my eyes, her eyes. We didn't know to do. She nearly started crying.

TL;DR - Had sex, thought the condom had a hole in it, filled it with water and watched as my bathroom was coated in jizz-water.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r3w68s

sometimes when I am horny, I put chocolate and marshmallows on my dick while I masturbate heating them up melting them with the heat from thrusting my fast meat, and pretend I'm a smore

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r3vwko

Nock Em is a repetitive, boring, obnoxious song. With little going for it, the production is just generic, and the general sound is mainly going to a more generic dubstep sound but not diving all that deep into the soundscape of dubstep in the slightest. The noises are like a lesser Heks, as the distorted bass noises in that EP were ultra crunchy, and actually really nice to listen to.

The ones in Nock Em are exactly what you'd hear in a lesser dubstep single, which is an extreme downgrade from what you had in Heks. But it doesn't want to commit to the dubstep sound, and seemingly tries to go for a less extreme that is DNB. But it doesn't have anything going for it like Heks did, or even Bronco Space Program, a very not DNB album.

When you listen to Mescalinks main "drop" you get this incredibly powerful sound broken up by these incredibly nice Yamaha-type sounds, and other random extremely crunchy sounding noises that sound incredibly amazing in headphones.

Then you go to Nock Em, and it's just a flat bass with nothing to add to it except this incredibly uninteresting generic wub, and generic synth combo. It's exactly what I've heard in your average Monstercat/NCS upload. The second half of the drop is also one of the most dreadful things I've ever heard, it sounds like someone made a really bad remix of Nock Em INSIDE of Nock Em.

Not to mention the atmosphere Mescalink builds with it's scratchy noises, and softer sounding instrumentation at parts. It really builds into the harder parts with what it is.

Whereas all Nock Em does is add sounds which would maybe be atmospheric if it wasn't in a song which seemingly decided to try to be atmospheric while not conveying it in the slightest by having drums blaring over it like every other dubstep song seems to do.

Maybe I conveyed this stupidly, but I think this is trying to be constructive, not that it matters.

All in all, Mescalink > Nock Em.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r3ukt2

Look, I’m sorry, ok? I didn’t mean to give your post about your dead relative a wholesome award, it was just the free award I happened to get at the time! I mean, like, 11 other people gave you that award too. It wasn’t just me! Besides, it’s the thought that counts, isn’t it?! Stop being so fucking ungrateful! It’s just a fucking fake internet point! It doesn’t even do anything! I should’ve given you a fucking *downvote* you fucking prick!

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r3tu30

Hey guys, did you know that in terms of human companionship, Flareon is objectively the most huggable Pokemon? While thieir maximum temperature is likely too much for most, they are capable of controlling it, so they can set themselves to the perfect temperature for you. Along with that, they have a lot of fluff, making them undeniably incredibly soft to touch. But that’s not all, they have a very respectable special defense stat of 110, which means they are likely very calm and and resistant to emotional damage. Because of this, if you have a bad day, you can vent to it while hugging it, and it won’t mind. It can make itself even more endearing with moves like Charm and Baby Doll Eyes, ensuring that you never have a prolonged bout of depression again.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r3sqh5

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Me ||
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Unsee juice

(((big sip)))

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r3quu3

Scientifically speaking everything is wrong in this video. It seems like this guy is tryin to mimic the movements of breasts of that anime girl but that guy surely has not succeed.

Judging by the size of the anime girls breasts the centre of mass of the breast must be located near her nipples(assuming that her breasts are perfectly hemispherical) and let's not forget the radius of the anime girls breasts. I think it might be 7-8 cm amd let's consider its weight to be 1kg. Therefore moment of inertia of the breast will be equal to MR² (assuming the radius to be equal to radius of gyration)

Also 8cm =0.08m Therefore MOI= 1×(0.08)²=0.0064kg.m

But that's not the case with balloons as they are light and they have large radius of gyration making its MOI larger as compared to the breasts of that anime girl which inturn will increase its angular momentum.

So, in terms of science this guy as failed miserably in mimicking the movements of breasts of this anime girl

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r3qf8r

you fell off + ratio + you're white + you're british + who asked + no u + deez nuts + radio + don't care + didn't ask + i'm a minor + i'm neurodivergent + caught in 4k + cope + seethe + GG + in 1947 the world's first general purpose computer, the 30 ton ENIAC was created + your mom's + the hood watches markiplier now + grow up + L + L (part 2) + retweet + ligma + taco bell tortilla crunch + think outside the bun + ur benched + ur a wrench + i own you + ur dad fell off + my dad could beat ur dad up + ur aimhacking + silver elite + tryhard + boomer + sksksksk + ur beta + i'm sigma + ur submissive + L (part 3) + yb better + ur sus + this is a cry for help and i'm extremely depressed. + quote tweet + you're cringe + i did your mom + you bought monkey nft + you're weirdchamp + you're a clown + my father left me at the age of 4 and i never recovered since + my dad owns steam + who want me? + i'm lonely + they didn't think it could possibly happen, but they're releasing L (part 5)

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r3odwc

Source: https://old.reddit.com/r3mqhp