I always wondered if voldemort would be the perfect person to receive analingus from. His face could rest perfectly within the confines of my bootycheeks, and with his advanced vocabularies in regards to casting spells, I'm sure some of the tonge twirls he would tickle my taint with would result in some grundlebutter dripping sofly down my legs, similar to when I experience gastrointestinal bloat due to my high spaghettios diet. Anybody else ever think about this? 🤔🤔🤔

I will do it

That little "AIEEEE" she does when she jumps down from short ledges just gets my blood pumping. Like I wish she'd jump from a small ledge onto me and knock the wind from my body, before having her way with me as she speaks Latin I barely understand.

Fuck, it's not fair. Why would Ubisoft create a character so perfect and yet restrict her to the digital realm?

Despite being the smallest character in the game, I'd let her dominate me. Sometimes when another player is playing her, I'll let her win, just so I can feel degraded by Peacekeeper.

I'd do anything to get executed by Peacekeeper IRL. ANYTHING.

Fuck guys, I just can't anymore. Fuck.

Peter Griffin Gay Sex Tycoon is the best video game ever. It is a very fun and realistic game.

In the game you start off as Peter and you have to kidnap random men from the town and force them to have gay sex in your basement while you record them. You have to publish the footages of gay sex in your porn site ''petergriffingaysex.com'' and you will earn money as people watch your gay porn. Once you have enough money you can buy a factory and use child labour to make sex toys which can be sold to increase your profits. You have to make sure Louis and your children don't find out about the gay sex business or the child labour business otherwise they will call the police and you will be arrested, making you lose the game. I'd recommend you to just kill your entire family in case they find out.

Since you don't pay your actors and force them to have non consensual gay sex, they are technically your slaves, for this reason you have to keep all of them locked in your basement and not let any of them escape. Yes your slaves will try to escape so you have to keep an eye on them all the time. You can also pay your friends Joe, Cleveland and Quagmire to work as security guards in your basement to prevent your slaves from escaping. If one of your slaves escape the police will come to your house and you will lose the game.

The best part of the game is hearing your slaves cry things like ''please master, I'll give you all my money if you let me out''. Sometimes, they will organize an attack against you and you'll have to tase them in case they do that.

The game is very realistic too. If you don't subject your slaves to blood tests and execute those who have Aids, an Aids pandemic will happen in your basement and your slaves will die. There are also a lot of other STDs in the game. Your slaves might die of hunger if you don't feed them and some might get sick from lack of sunlight too from being locked in your basement for too long, but if your slaves are sick and dying, you can hire SCP-049 to treat them.

I love that game, I even let my little sister play it sometimes. It is her favourite game as well.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a mother, father, their son and daughter, and a little baby. The father says to the talent agent, "Sir, our family has an amazing act. We know if you would let us perform it for you you would want to sign us." And the talent agent says, "Sorry, we don't sign family acts. They're too cutesy." But then the mother goes, "Please, sir, if you just give us two minutes, we know you'll like our act." So the talent agent says, "All right, you've got two minutes." The family jumps ''right into it''. The mother smiles and points to the son, who hits "Play" on a boombox. Thrilling circus music starts to play as the father spins his daughter around, bends her over, lifts up her skirts and starts licking her asshole. Then the son lays down on the floor and opens his mouth, and the mother tears off tear-away pants, squats down over his face and starts shitting bloody diarrhea all over him. The father grabs the baby, takes off his diaper and starts sucking his cock. While the son, still with his mother's shit in his mouth, goes over and licks the baby's tiny little balls. Now the mother lays down on her back on the floor while the daughter gets up high on a chair and starts pissing all over. Then the father and son take the baby and start stuffing it head-first back into the mother's vagina, while the daughter's piss rains down on all of them. They get the baby halfway in so that just his legs are sticking out all kicking and flailing around, and the son takes the mother's shit out of his mouth and starts rubbing it all over everyone while the father sticks his cock in the baby's asshole and fucks it while it's still inside the mother, until he cums all over the baby, the wife, the son, then the son takes a kitchen knife from a bag and chops the baby's head off and starts eating the baby's limbs and flesh while its covered in blood, then rips out the right eye from its socket and eats it while both the son and the baby have cum, blood, piss, and shit all over them. Then the mother takes the kitchen knife and shoves into her mouth, causing her to puke vomit and blood all over everyone. Then the father gets up and says, "And now for our impersonation of the jewish victims of the holocaust." And the whole family starts running around screaming and laughing with their dicks and titties all flapping around, covered with piss and shit and cum, goin' ' "AAAAAaaAAAAhhh! AAAAAaaAAAAhhh!, We're all going to die! Hitler is going to kill us! Heeelllppp!!!" ' And finally the family runs back to the center of the room and goes, "Ta-Da!!" And the talent agent, he just sits there for the longest time, and finally he says, "...Jesus, that's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "the Aristocrats!"

Why are Japanese girls so hard to talk to? I'm polite. Each time I approach one, I say "konichiwa". I always ask them about their favourite anime before talking about my waifu. They're usually really shy (which is cute imo) but I hate that I have to be the one to constantly engage in conversations with them, and how they usually get disinterested because I'm a white guy. Yes, I get that it's awkward because of things like Pearl Harbor, but I don't hold it against them. They weren't in Unit 731, so why judge them for it? Why can't the himes just realize that I respect Japanese culture and that I really want to be part of it. I'm willing to marry a Japanese woman, adopt Japanese children and even live in Japan for the rest of my life. Hell, I'm even learning the language by watching undubbed anime. Plus, I cook a mean bowl of rice (for those who don't know, Japanese eat a lot of rice, I do too my Mom says that I act like a Japanese person because of all the rice I eat and the anime I watch).

Batman, I -I I caught uh-I caught a little Pokemon.

Do you wanna know what Pokemon I caught?

What Pokemon did you catch, Joker?

I caught a Lopunny, Batman.... I caught a Lopunny

Oh No, Joker. Don't tell me.

You already know Batman, You know what I'm gonna do to that thing!

Joker! It's an animal Joker you can't!

BATMAN, THERE IS NO LAWS AGAINST THE POKEMON BATMAN! I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT WITH IT!

NO GOD, OH GOD, NO DON'T DO IT!

I'M GONNA DO IT, BATMAN!

Once upon a time, there lived a small and mischievous Telitubby. This Telitubby, known as Tinky-Winky, was always getting into trouble, much to the chagrin of his fellow Telitubbies. One day, Tinky-Winky had had enough of the other Telitubbies' constant nagging and decided to explore the world outside of Teletubbyland. He stumbled upon a small, unsuspecting cat in the nearby woods and, in a moment of rage, decided to take out all his frustrations on this poor creature. Tinky-Winky grabbed the cat and started to rape it. The cat, being so small and helpless, was unable to fight back and could only meow in pain and terror. Tinky-Winky continued his attack, going so far as to bite the poor creature's neck in order to keep it from escaping. The cat was left traumatized and scared. It was too afraid to go back to its home and was too scared to stay in the same place as the Telitubby. It eventually found a safe place to hide, but it was never the same again. The other Telitubbies, upon learning of Tinky-Winky's heinous act, were horrified and filled with rage. They decided that something had to be done, and soon, Tinky-Winky was put on trial for his crime. After much deliberation, the jury found him guilty and sentenced him to life in prison. Tinky-Winky was never heard from again, and the cat was able to recover from its trauma in time. To this day, the other Telitubbies still speak of the incident in hushed tones. The cat eventually found a new home and was able to lead a normal life, but it was never quite the same. The other Telitubbies were so horrified by what Tinky-Winky had done that they decided to take matters into their own hands and seek justice for the cat’s family. They tracked down the cat’s family and, in a moment of rage, they attacked them. The cat’s family was too small and helpless to fight back and were left traumatized and scared. The Telitubbies continued their attack, going so far as to bite the poor creatures’ necks in order to keep them from escaping. The cat’s family was left traumatized and scared. They were too afraid to go back to their home and were too scared to stay in the same place as the Telitubbies. Eventually, they found a safe place to hide, but they were never quite the same. The father of the cat’s family had had enough. He had watched his beloved pet suffer at the hands of the Telitubbies and he was determined to seek justice. He tracked down the dog belonging to one of his neighbors and, in a fit of rage, he brutally murdered it. He ripped the poor animal apart, leaving it in a bloody heap on the ground. The father cat then proceeded to hunt down the rest of the neighborhood’s animals, brutally murdering them one by one. He even went so far as to track down and slaughter the neighbor’s pet rabbit, leaving its remains scattered in the yard. The father cat’s rampage didn’t end there, however. He eventually tracked down the neighbor’s family and attacked them with a ferocity that left them all dead. He left their bodies in a bloody pile in the middle of their living room, a reminder to all of the power of his vengeance.

The father cat had had enough. His rampage had taken a toll on him and he was determined to end it all. He tracked down his wife and children, who had managed to hide from him during his rampage, and brutally murdered them. He ripped them apart, limb from limb, leaving them in a bloody heap on the ground. The father cat then found himself in his own home, and he realized that he had nothing left. He had destroyed the lives of his own family, and he had taken the lives of innocent animals. He was filled with guilt and despair, and he could not bear to live with the consequences of his actions. The father cat decided to end it all, and he took his own life. He cut his dick off, ate it then. Finally disembowelled himself with a toilet role and hung himself with his intestines for his dead sons monster cock.

I must apologize for a recent tweet about a shot from The Super Mario Bros. Movie trailer that clearly many people found upsetting. The tweet seems to have struck a chord with many people, some calling me "weird" or "gay". My intentions were simply to shed light on an interaction between a big gruff turtle monster and a handsome green Italian plumber that I interpreted as suggestive but clearly, this was a mistake, and I am sorry. The people just aren't ready to accept the romance between Bowser and Luigi, and sadly, I fear they never will. I mean, think about it for a moment. In the trailers, Bowser has kidnapped Luigi and is interrogating him about his brother, Mario, who poses a threat to his ever-growing empire. Luigi is placed in a position of weakness, even more so with his body completely restricted by Kamek. Then we get to the infamous shot, where Bowser playfully lifts Luigi's face with his large finger. He is doing this to create eye contact with Luigi, who up until this point has been looking away timidly. It seems at first glance to be a typical power play to assert his dominance over Luigi. However in contrast to his typical aggressive demeanor, Bowser is incredibly gentle with Luigi's face. There is a fleeting softness to this moment that tells me that behind Bowser's hard exterior shell, is a gentle monster that simply wants companionship, someone to hold. Anyway, sorry.

Introducing: P-P-PEDOPHILE MAGNET! THE NEW PEDOPHILE-ATTRACTING MAGNET BY Emanuele Saverio Salvatore Baroni Gandolfi INC.!

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THIS INCREDIBLE DEVICE WILL MAKE YOUR DMS INSTANTLY FULL OF totally normal guys AND SOME other people with a beard. BUY NOW AT ONLY 3.6367 ¥!

1. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE STOP USING THAT FACE!!! HOLY SHIT IS IT AWFUL!!! I'VE NEVER SEEN SOMETHING SO INFURIATING AS THAT!!!! IT'S LIKE IT WAS DESIGNED TO BE TORTUROUS TO WHOEVER PEERED THEIR GAZE AT IT!!! I'VE NEVER SEEN SOMETHING SO FOUL. SO DIRTY. SO MALICIOUS. SO INHUMANE AND SHAMELESS AS THAT FACE.. PLEAAAAAASE!!! STOP USING IT!!! I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ANYMORE! I AM BEGGING. BEGGING!! PLEADING AS IF MY VERY LIFE WAS ON THE LINE!! I HATW OWO AND UWU SO MUCH IT BRINGS OUT THE WORSE IN ME!! YOU HAVE YOU REMOVE THAT WORD FROM YOUR VOCABULARY!! I'M SICK OF IT!! PLEASE!!! PLEASE STOP USING IT!!! I'LL DO ANYTHING!! PLEAAAAAAAAASE

Sex does not exist. Sex is merely a concept created by women to get us to do what they want. When was the last time you had sex?

In this position, your best move is to start by experimenting with feminine clothing. If it makes you feel good to do so, you can move on to makeup, shaving your legs, and those sorts of things. Another move available to you depending on the precise details of your position is breastforms or wearing a bra stuffed with something to make your chest look more feminine. Experiment with the moves available to you a bit and see which ones you like - undo is always an option at this stage. If the results of your experiments are consistent with a feminine playstyle, your next play is to talk to a doctor about medical options. Most medical options will not have the undo function available, though the puberty blocker move is an exception. Keep making moves on the social presentation front while also advancing your pieces towards a physical body you feel comfortable with. I recommend capturing injectable hormones as they are the most effective - you'll never get used to the needle but trust me, it's worth it and you only have to make that sacrifice once a week.

Please do not commit suicide. Once I was on a train and I saw someone commit suicide in a video call, I have an extreme gore fetish so when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw the video call. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one video call. This was all their fault, they could have prevented this if they did not commit suicide.

If I was a girl, I would get pregnant as many times as possible, then have abortions after the third month of being pregnant so i would deliver a potato sized 1/3 developed dead fetus, then i would take the fetus, put it in a jar of preservative liquid and put it on a shelf in a secret room in my house. and i would do it until i had so many the rooms walls were nothing but potato sized aborted fetuses. then i would have a kid and when they're bad i would make them sit in the fetus room and remind them of how easy i could have aborted their ass.

**(Big TMI)**

I can't believe I'm even typing this, the whole experience has been utterly mortifying and I don't know if I can bring myself to tell anyone yet.

So, I'm quite a baby gay and have only been out for a year. I've been dating a guy until recently but we split up after he moved across the state. We did stuff together but never actual anal. My new status as *bona fide* bachelor made the prospect of a hook-up pretty appealing. I was tentative about Grindr because of its reputation but I was in a bit of a fuck-it mood. I got chatting to a guy and we met up the next evening. He was warm, friendly, muscular and definitely very masc so I kind've knew I'd be a bottom if we did anything (people usually think of me as a twink).

He was great, we went out for drinks and eventually came back to his apartment. There was great chemistry and we were both pretty horny. I told him I hadn't done everything before and he was so nice about it; taking it easy, being supportive and reassuring. It was silently acknowledged that he'd top me; and once he started it was so unbelievably good; I've never experienced anything like it. I was so focused on his body and our intimacy that it was blissful. He was really enthusiastic and once he finally pulled out, there was this strange rumbling and aching sensation in my ass and a churning in my stomach.

My guy was totally in the swing of it and he quickly asked if he could rim me. I kind of barely replied because of the aching but I guess he thought I said yes. As he started, I could suddenly feel this gushing need to shit, like really fucking badly and quickly. I tried to warn him, but before I knew it, a cascade of crap had rushed from my ass right into his face (**I mean like molten lava spicy curry niagara falls type stuff**). I couldn't control it *at all*. He was absolutely disgusted ,and immediately started vomiting all over the sitting room. He began shouting between pukes, cussing me as he finally made it to the bathroom. There was shit all over the couch and pillows.

I'm completely devastated by this experience; it was awful, so embarrassing and I can't believe I did that to such a lovely guy. I've tried to text him several times since last night but he must have blocked me because I've not received a response. I don't know what to do, and I'm absolutely shocked and distressed by what's happened.

Do you bros have any advice?

‼️HOLY FUCKING SHIT‼️‼️‼️‼️ IS THAT A MOTHERFUCKING ANTICOMMUNISM REFERENCE??????!!!!!!!!!!11!1!1!1!1!1!1! 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 COMMUNISM BAD 🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯💯 [comically large number of people between 50 and 500 million] ARE SO DEAD 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎👊👊👊👊👊 STARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVESTARVE 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩 😩😩😩😩 ANIMAL FARM? ANIMAL FARM? ANIMAL FARM? ANIMAL FARM? ANIMAL FARM? ANIMAL FARM? ANIMAL FARM? ANIMAL FARM? ANIMAL FARM? ANIMAL FARM? ANIMAL FARM? ANIMAL FARM? 🤬😡🤬😡🤬😡🤬🤬😡🤬🤬😡 IT'S HUMAN NATURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S HUMAN NATURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 Yo McCarthy! 😈 IT'S A UTOPIA! IT'S A UTOPIA! IT'S A UTOPIA IT'S A UTOPIA! IT'S A UTOPIA! IT'S A UTOPIA IT'S A UTOPIA! IT'S A UTOPIA! IT'S A UTOPIA IT'S A UTOPIA! IT'S A UTOPIA! IT'S A UTOPIA IT'S A UTOPIA! IT'S A UTOPIA! IT'S A UTOPIA 💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯 MILLION DEAD Oh you’re a communist❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓But you own a phone though‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣😂😂

Leave my mother the hell alone. I messaged you those because I was under the impression I was blocked. You literally went out of your way to see them. I didnt even mean most of it. Id shoot myself in the skull before ever getting back with you. Your dumbass legally threatened my family.

You threatened ME over a DISCORD message. I have no respect for you and no desire to ever be with you again. You betrayed ALL of us. You LIED about us. We NEVER messaged you on an alt, you fucking psychopath. You messaged ME on an alt. Just to say youve "gotten me off everything"

I only miss you because I still consider you a friend. And im so fucking worried about you.

We spoke everyday, and everynight we always said goodnight to each other. Even before we were together.

And still you fucking broke my heart, i broke up with you, you LIED about me, and threatened FUCKING LEGAL ACTION. Youre disgusting.

And now youre getting your MOM to talk to mine??? Leave her the fuck alone. My mom is worked to death and doesnt need your shit.

meanwhile the others are confused. And hurt.

Youre sick. And by the way, you literally CANT get a restraining order on me you fucking dumbass. Text is an optional speaking platform. SPEAKING to someone isnt a crime. Get fucking well. I love you.

That's some good cuisine culture right there. I prefere my toddlers rare but it is also good to eat them raw. Letting them run a little and then chasing them makes the meat much softer and much more delicious. It always tastes different when you put in extra work in your meals.

When I don't feel in the mood for eating I release my catchs or gnaw and release as me and my buddies say.

Sometimes I get really hungry and I know that catching an easy prey like a toddler won't satisfy me or my hunger so I get some of my buddies and we start going around to hunt a larger prey. Now I don't want to seem like bragging but we have taken down a 220 lb human adult. Fat ass couldn't even run away we feasted on him for 3 days. It was delicious, we even brought some for the kids to eat.

I sometimes argue with my wife about this, she says that this hunting hobby of mine is toxic, harmful and unnecessary, but what can I say, it's in my genes to provide for my family. We always make up after the meals because well, what kind of pitbull stay mad after eating some human fingers?

I just downvoted your comment.

FAQ

What does this mean?

The amount of karma (points) on your comment and Reddit account has decreased by one.

Why did you do this?

There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be unworthy of positive or neutral karma. These include, but are not limited to:

• ⁠Rudeness towards other Redditors,
• ⁠Spreading incorrect information,
• ⁠Sarcasm not correctly flagged with a /s.

Am I banned from the Reddit?

No - not yet. But you should refrain from making comments like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to issue an additional downvote, which may put your commenting and posting privileges in jeopardy.

I don't believe my comment deserved a downvote. Can you un-downvote it?

Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I undo a downvote. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me a private message explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to Reddit PMs within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of downvote appeals are rejected, and yours is likely no exception.

How can I prevent this from happening in the future?

Accept the downvote and move on. But learn from this mistake: your behavior will not be tolerated on Reddit.com. I will continue to issue downvotes until you improve your conduct. Remember: Reddit is privilege, not a right.

drop your fave copypasta in comments and i’ll run it thru google translate using (but not limited to) icelandic, german, dutch, afrikaans, and more.

i will post these as a reply in the comments so i don’t spam the reddit

i got this idea from u/throwaway01061124

mods please don’t delete this, i know this in itself isn’t a copypasta but it’s related 🙏