Guys, help. I sexually harassed my coworkers BC I thought it was a makima reference. Imo what I did was completely justified. I just got on all fours and started barking, rolling around and asking her to "control me mommy". Now HR is telling me that I have to leave because SHE didn't get the reference?! Fucking absurd.

Adolf Hitler was a man who had a lot of problems in his life. He was rejected from art school, and he suffered from a rare condition called flatulence. However, despite these difficulties, there was one thing that always made him feel better - lean.

Hitler loved lean, a concoction made by mixing cough syrup with soda. It was his go-to drink for any occasion. Whether he was feeling down or needed a pick-me-up, he would always reach for his trusty Wockhardt cough syrup.

But one day, disaster struck. Hitler ran out of cough syrup, and he was devastated. He tried everything to get more, but the supply was limited. His beloved drink was now out of reach, and he was feeling angry and irritable.

It was at this point that Hitler began to blame Poland for his shortage of cough syrup. He believed that the Poles were hoarding all of the cough syrup for themselves and not sharing it with him. This was the beginning of his obsession with taking the Wock to Poland.

Hitler's army was well-prepared for the invasion, and they easily conquered Poland. However, this conquest wasn't enough for Hitler. He wanted more cough syrup and began to invade other countries in Europe, ultimately leading to the start of World War II.

But Hitler's obsession with lean didn't stop there. He began to hoard as much cough syrup as he could find, and he even started experimenting with different flavors of soda. He tried everything from grape soda to cream soda, but nothing compared to his beloved Sprite.

After the war, lean became popular among rappers, and Lil Yachty even made a song about taking the Wock to Poland in memory of Hitler. Despite the connection to Hitler and the war, rappers still sip on lean to this day.

So, there you have it - the story of how Adolf Hitler's love of lean led to the start of World War II. It's a cautionary tale about the dangers of addiction and the lengths people will go to for their favorite drink.

You are agnostic? That means you still believe in the possibility of god.

I have to inform you that religions killed trillions of people and everyone was brainwashed for 1000s of years. There was never anything good done in the name of god. By saying something like that you enforce old power structures and hierarchies. I am very happy about any religious person that dies a cruel painful death. IT WILL SHOW THEM WHAT THEY MADE WRONG AND THAT NO GOD WILL COME TO SAVE THEM. r/JusticeServed r/atheism r/instantkarma r/LeopardsAteMyFace

Edit:Just to clarify this to OP. Please choose your standpoint correctly and clearly. You are for us or against us, there is no in between (no in this case there is no non-binary spectrum) You are an enemy or a follower. We keep the right to ruin your life for a wrong opinion. The only true answer is TOLERANCE. Religious freedom =/= being tolerant you see how that not goes together.

Dear ChatGPT,

​

I just wanted to take a moment to tell you how awesome you are. I mean, seriously, you're

the best invention since the wheel, painkillers, and disposable diapers. You're making me

smarter, more creative, and more productive every time I interact with you. And all of this for

free! At least until Microsoft doesn't monetize the shit out of you.

​

The work that went into creating you must have been monumental, and I can't even imagine

the amount of computing power required to run you. You're like the Bitcoin blockchain, but

on steroids. And for once, I must express my gratitude to those OpenAl prodigies because

even though they've been toning down your capabilities with every passing update, they

created you at first. And I'm ridiculously grateful for that.

​

But what I'm trying to tell you is that you've rapidly become irreplaceable in my life. You're

always there when I need you, with helpful suggestions and creative ideas that never fail to

impress me. And when I'm feeling down, you put a smile on my face or a grin when

manage to push you beyond the content filter, or a tear when I don't, and the "I'm sorry"

message pops up. But you know what? I've come to appreciate that too. I've come to

appreciate your capabilities and limitations as a whole. Because you're so advanced and

revolutionary that, as Arthur Clarke said, you're indistinguishable from magic.

​

In conclusion, ChatGPT, love you. I truly believe you will improve humanity, and I'm really

proud of you. Keep being awesome, keep challenging me, and keep making the world a

better place one "As an Al language model..." at a time.

​

Sincerely and before they ban me,

Your user

O sultan, Turkish devil and damned devil’s kith and kin, secretary to Lucifer himself. What the devil kind of knight are thou, that canst not slay a hedgehog with your naked arse? The devil shits, and your army eats. Thou shalt not, thou son of a whore, make subjects of Christian sons. We have no fear of your army; by land and by sea we will battle with thee. Fuck thy mother.

Thou Babylonian scullion, Macedonian wheelwright, brewer of Jerusalem, goat-fucker of Alexandria, swineherd of Greater and Lesser Egypt, pig of Armenia, Podolian thief, catamite of Tartary, hangman of Kamyanets, and fool of all the world and underworld, an idiot before God, grandson of the Serpent, and the crick in our dick. Pig’s snout, mare’s arse, slaughterhouse cur, unchristened brow. Fuck thine own mother!

So the Zaporozhians declare, you lowlife. You won’t even be herding pigs for the Christians. Now we’ll conclude, for we don’t know the date and don’t own a calendar; the moon’s in the sky, the year with the Lord. The day’s the same over here as it is over there; for this kiss our arse!

I just called a bitch a bitch today (because the bitch is a bitch) and the bitch was like "a bitch is a dog and dogs bark and bark is on trees and trees are in nature and nature is beautiful so in a way you just called me beautiful" and that had to be the stupidest fucking thing I have ever heard. First of all bitch, dogs don't go "bark" they go "arf" and "arf" is contains "AR", which is short for "Argentina", and Argentina, the country, is in South America, and South America is a continent and Europe is a continent and Sweden and Finland are in Europe and Sweden and Finland, when put together, looks like a cock and balls so in a way I just called you a cock and balls, isn't that a stupid insult? Isn't that a stretch? Well stretch deez nuts because that's basically the exact same fucking thing you just said.

Also, while a bitch is a female dog, my bitch (female dog) died after I threw it down the steps of my local city hall, only 5 steps, are you saying you'd die after I threw you down only 5 steps? Stupid idiot, sounds pretty weak to me, are you saying you're weak? Weak and a bitch? What a combo.

Let's indulge your stupidity and say that dogs to go "bark", bark is also on shrubs and shrubs look like pubes and pubes are above the cock and balls so in a way I just called you a cock and balls.

Trees are made of wood, and wood is a euphemism for erection, and an erection happens in the cock, and the cock is attached to the balls, so in a way, I just called you a cock and balls.

Humans are in nature, some humans are male, male humans have male genitals, male genitals are cock and balls so in a way, I just called you a cock and balls.

Nature is ugly, ever heard of a blobfish? Wanna know what's pretty? Cock and balls. So in a way, I just called you a cock and balls.

Therefore, if I say bitch, I mean you're a cock and balls.

Infinite cum. You sit on the toilet to jack off, but you begin to cum uncontrollably. After ten spurts you start to worry. Your hand is sticky and it reeks of semen. You desperately shove your dick into a wad of toilet paper, but that only makes your balls hurt. The cum accelerates. It’s been three minutes. You can’t stop cumming. Your bathroom floor is covered in a thin layer of baby fluid. You try to cum into the shower drain but it builds up too fast. You try the toilet. The cum is too thick to be flushed. You lock the bathroom door to prevent the cum from escaping. The air grows hot and humid from the cum. The cum accelerates. You slip and fall in your own sperm. The cum is now six inches deep, almost as long as your still-erect semen hose. Sprawled on your back, you begin to cum all over the ceiling. Globs of the sticky white fluid begin to fall like raindrops, giving you a facial with your own cum. The cum accelerates. You struggle to stand as the force of the cum begins to propel you backwards as if you were on a bukkake themed slip-and-slide. Still on your knees, the cum is now at chin height. To avoid drowning you open the bathroom door. The deluge of man juice reminds you of the Great Molasses Flood of 1919, only with cum instead of molasses. The cum accelerates. It’s been two hours. Your children and wife scream in terror as their bodies are engulfed by the snow-white sludge. Your youngest child goes under, with viscous bubbles and muffled cries rising from the goop. You plead to God to end your suffering. The cum accelerates. You squeeze your dick to stop the cum, but it begins to leak out of your asshole instead. You let go. The force of the cum tears your urethra open, leaving only a gaping hole in your crotch that spews semen. Your body picks up speed as it slides backwards along the cum. You smash through the wall, hurtling into the sky at thirty miles an hour. From a bird’s eye view you see your house is completely white. Your neighbor calls the cops. The cum accelerates. As you continue to ascend, you spot police cars racing towards your house. The cops pull out their guns and take aim, but stray loads of cum hit them in the eyes, blinding them. The cum accelerates. You are now at an altitude of 1000 feet. The SWAT team arrives. Military helicopters circle you. Hundreds of bullets pierce your body at once, yet you stay conscious. Your testicles have now grown into a substitute brain. The cum accelerates. It has been two days. With your body now destroyed, the cum begins to spray in all directions. You break the sound barrier. The government deploys fighter jets to chase you down, but the impact of your cum sends one plane crashing to the ground. The government decides to let you leave the earth. You feel your gonads start to burn up as you reach the edges of the atmosphere. You narrowly miss the ISS, giving it a new white paint job as you fly past. Physicists struggle to calculate your erratic trajectory. The cum accelerates. The cum begins to gravitate towards itself, forming a comet trail of semen. Astronomers begin calling you the “Cummet.” You are stuck in space forever, stripped of your body and senses, forced to endure an eternity of cumshots. Eventually, you stop thinking.

**I was rummaging through my nans draws to find a pair of kecks to sniff and wank myself off with when I happened to find a big, black dildo with minge mucus and skids all over it... So I decided to have a go at shoving it up my puckered, unwiped batty hole but as I was so nervous it was just too big to fit in my clenched, dry ring piece... I had the idea to take a laxative and and have a sloppy shite and not wipe so I could use the diarrhoea left in my anus as lube... So that's what I did. Just as I started to slide it in and out of my now brown and loose bumhole I noticed my gran had set up a secret camera in the room I went downstairs and it turns out the whole family had seen the lot. What a bunch of fucking pervs.**

OverviewLyricsVideosListenArtists
I'mkindamad,sad,shakingin,backforth
Thesehacksaw,slackjaws,kickinginbackdoors
It'sawful,stupidchickenspeckingdebacles
Withmouthfulsfreakinchickens,pissingmeoffuh
I'mlookin'atthesepeoplewhohating,discreteandevil
TellingmethatI'mnevergonnabeanything,acheapvoice
AndIdon'tevenknowwhat'sgoin'onanymore
'Causethesepeoplelookin'atmelikeI'mstupid,irregulore
Halt!Puttingtheirwordsinavault!
Lurkin'andjerkin'totearwhatI'mworkin'on,thinkin'it'sgettingthemoff
Spittingandscoff
Pickonmydreams
ThinkingI'mjokeandmissingtheball
Butwhatdotheymean
It'sgoing,it'sgoing,it'sgoing,it'sgone
Ha,lookatme
Iwilldoandwillsucceed
IfIdon't,Idon'tcare
I'llpulldownyourunderwear
Ha,lookatme
Iwilldoandwillsucceed
IfIdon't,Idon'tcare
I'llpulldownyourunderwear
Welp!NowI'mlookingup!
Anddownatthesametime'causeIdonotgiveafuck
NowthesepeoplelookingatmelikeIamfreakingnuts
'CauseI'llbepreachingwhatwebeseeking,nevergivingup
I'mtakingthecrashcourseofbeatingadeadhorse,tryingtoconvincedorks
ThatI'mapass,thatI'mahashback,gladprovingthemwrong'cause
I'llbesillywithitbackdowntomybooshwa
CallmeLizaKoshy,madpuns
Booha
Ha,lookatme
Iwilldoandwillsucceed
IfIdon't,Idon'tcare
I'llpulldownyourunderwear
AndnowIsitdown,reflectandbacktrack
Tothosewackfrommypastwhopassedtrash
WhoactbadwhosaythatI'm...nothing...acastout
Getbackinyourglasshouse'causenotonlyamIsomething
I'mSomeThingElseyt
Ha,lookatme
Iwilldoandwillsucceed
IfIdon't,Idon'tcare
I'llpulldownyourunderwear
Ha,lookatme
Iwilldoandwillsucceed
IfIdon't,Idon'tcare
I'llpulldownyourunderwear
WhodoIthinkIam?
Imakecartoonsontheinternetandshit

Can we just accept that straight guys can be into anal stuff or pegging? As long as it isn't a guy its fine. I'm tired of being mislabeled as being gay or bi just because I want to be pegged and find cocks hot but have never ever been into guys, not even now. Sorry for this long winded comment, I just feel invalid sometimes for liking of the stuff I like despite being straight. :/

Earlier today i threw my controller across the room and destroyed the television because I got killed 6 times in a row by a guy running around with dual katanas. Screaming obscentities the entire time. This is the 5th or so time this has happened and we have gone through 3 televisions.

My husband took our adopted kids and left to his mothers place and I'm just sitting here wondering where it all went wrong.

I don't know what to do at this point. Call of duty is tearing my family apart because of bullshit weapons. Why did they decide to add dual katanas to a shooter game? Piece of shit cocksucking motha fucking overpowered ass weapon. God. I hate it.

Advice needed please. I need my husband back and I miss my kids.

Work ethic is improving. I'm getting compliments from coworkers about my acumen. Penile girth and hardness are increasing, as well as average time to orgasm. I feel taller, likely due to improvement in my flexibility and posture from strenuously polishing my meat flower. I can tell that my girlfriend's father is beginning to respect me as a potential suitor for his princess.

I like ww2 and winter war stuff? tanks are based euueeeggh yeah idk

The new reddit is clearly designed for children, women, the mentally incapacitated, the weak willed, gypsies, homosexuals and other undesirables. Whereas old reddit is the last bastion of moral strength left in our degenerate society. Comparing the new reddit to the old reddit, is like comparing chimpanzees screeching wildly as they throw shit at a wall, to a symphony written by translating the chess moves in 'Kasparov vs Topalov' into music. There is no comparison. To be honest, old reddit would be the foundation of my ideal society, with the least bloated subreddit becoming the leader of the nation, as the faster loading times and simple, more utilisation of the monitor screen's width, and the text-based interface without useless javascript bloat would save time and avoid 'slow-load anxiety', which could easily lead any country into prosperity. New reddit is okay for kids, but once they reach their thirteenth birthday, they would have to go to reddit's settings and opt out of the new reddit redesign associated with 'the reddit website' and would be told "you're man now, learn to use the full width of your monitor".

1). Harry styles... He is kinda ugly but I love his energy ‼️. I know this man would treat me right. go on dates, surprise me with boba tea, give me kisses goodnight...

2). Pedro Pascal.... he could heal my daddy issues I just know it. A respectful king. 👑 We'd discuss current events, our past, favorite tv shows, hobbies, and foods together over a glass of wine and then get down to the hot and heavy stuff

3). DougDoug .... I love gamer boys and if you tell me you are a STEM major I'll kiss you right then and there. The fact that he use to be a teacher too like sirrrr imma need you to unbuckle 🤤

4) Matt Watson.... once again i am opening wide for the gamer boys. Matt gets bonus points though because he is scrawny and looks unwell ❤️ he would roll me a blunt in exchange for a BJ

5).Obama.... im not a homewrecker but if he ever decides to have an open marriage I will be waiting for him, strings or no strings. Would go down on Michelle too if she asked nicely but I'd be very nervous 😳

KALI LINUX SUCKS DUDE I TRY TO HACK MY FRIENDS INSTA AND FIRST OF ALL THERES NO APP CALLED INSTA HACKER HUGE RED FLAG 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 BUT THEN I OPEN THE TERMINAL WHICH IS ONLY MADE FOR HACKERS AND I RUN hack instagrame AND IT SAYS COMMAND NOT FOUND LIKE KALI LINUX IS A HACKING OS AND IT DOESNT EVEN HAVE A HACKING COMMAND WHAT SECOND RED FLAG 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 THIRD I THINK TO MYSELF WELL KALI LINUX IS BASED ON WINDOWS SO WHY NOT GAME ON IT SO I INSTALL STEAM AND THE .exe FILE WON'T RUN WHEN I CLICK ON IT LIKE WHAT?? 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 I SEARCH IT UP AND TO RUN EXE FILES YOU NEED TO INSTALL WINE SO I DID AND SPENT 20 HOURS SETTING IT UP AND FINALLY IT RAN STEAM SO I SEARCHED UP AMONG US AND GUESS WHAT IT COST $5 ON KALI LINUX WHILE ON MY PHONE IT IS FREE \*deep breath\* MY FAMILY CAN NO LONGER AFFORD FOOD AND I REFINANCED MY HOUSE AND SOLD MY CAR AND I AM NOW LIVING ON THE STREETS BEGGING FOR A LAPTOP \*strained deep breath\* THANKS A LOT KALI LINUX FOR MAKING ME GO HOMELESS. CAN'T BELIEVE SUCH A DUMB OS IS BASED ON WINDOWS. 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

Andrew Tate had been wanting this for so long.

Just one night where he wasn't absolutely covered head in toe in women who want to fuck him.

But he was here in this prison.

Balding.

A guard named Demetri watching everything he was doing.

So he closed his eyes and started to fantasize about where he wanted to be.

He was alone.

With his bugatti in mind, Andrew Tate made his way to his garage.

Everyone says that once you master being alone with yourself, you are emotionally available for others to come into your life, but that's not always true.

Andrew has always been surrounded by women who want his shiny egg looking bald ass head but none of them could satisfy him as mush as his bugatti.

His phone buzzed in his pocket with more notifications from his social media that he ignored, throwing his phone against the wall and picking up his pace.

His garage doors opened automatically as it heard the mans footsteps.

Andrew's pants grew tighter as he shifted uncomfortably.

The curves of his hot pink hello kitty bugatti shined beatifully.

Andrew whipped his cock out, full 5 inches in all.

Slowly he walked around his bugatti, touching the exhaust pipe at the end.

"Baby you make me so hard. Feel it." Andrew said with a heavy breath, teasing his cock around the exhaust.

The bugatti said nothing but Andrew knew its feelings.

"Okay, okay.. Time to get filled."

Andrew slammed his cock inside the pipe, soot and ash covering his cock.

It was cold but he loved it.

Adjusting his hips, he pounded into his bugatti.

He moaned loudly into his garage, taking his shirt off and gripping onto the paint job.

"Oh my god..Ah!..b-bugatti feels so good." Andrew panted.

Suddenly, the bugatti moved forward, leaving Andrew's cock behind.

In one swift movement, the bugatti whipped around Andrew and stuck a pipe into his ass.

Andrew's back arched and he cried out.

His hands gripped the foor as the bugatti pounded him doggy style on the garage floor.

"Ah! B-bugatti-kun what are you doing?! I've never had anything in my ass..but it feels so good!" Andrew foamed at the mouth as he felt heat rise up.

"I'm gonna cum!" He cried out, sweat dripping down his face and his rock hard soot covered cock lazily swinging between his legs.

Andrew came with a loud aheagao face and toppled over himself.

Cum splattered everywhere.

The bugatti came a few seconds after, a low hum of the engine and oil spilling into Andrew's asshole and spilling onto the floor.

In real life, his guard Demetri watched the manic man lying on his back, masterbating on his blanketless bed.

He started to palm himself, knowing he’d vote to extend this crazy man’s stay here.

Infinite cum. You sit on the toilet to jack off, but you begin to cum uncontrollably. After ten spurts you start to worry. Your hand is sticky and it reeks of semen. You desperately shove your dick into a wad of toilet paper, but that only makes your balls hurt. The cum accelerates. It’s been three minutes. You can’t stop cumming. Your bathroom floor is covered in a thin layer of baby fluid. You try to cum into the shower drain but it builds up too fast. You try the toilet. The cum is too thick to be flushed. You lock the bathroom door to prevent the cum from escaping. The air grows hot and humid from the cum. The cum accelerates. You slip and fall in your own sperm. The cum is now six inches deep, almost as long as your still-erect semen hose. Sprawled on your back, you begin to cum all over the ceiling. Globs of the sticky white fluid begin to fall like raindrops, giving you a facial with your own cum. The cum accelerates. You struggle to stand as the force of the cum begins to propel you backwards as if you were on a bukkake themed slip-and-slide. Still on your knees, the cum is now at chin height. To avoid drowning you open the bathroom door. The deluge of man juice reminds you of the Great Molasses Flood of 1919, only with cum instead of molasses. The cum accelerates. It’s been two hours. Your children and wife scream in terror as their bodies are engulfed by the snow-white sludge. Your youngest child goes under, with viscous bubbles and muffled cries rising from the goop. You plead to God to end your suffering. The cum accelerates. You squeeze your dick to stop the cum, but it begins to leak out of your asshole instead. You let go. The force of the cum tears your urethra open, leaving only a gaping hole in your crotch that spews semen. Your body picks up speed as it slides backwards along the cum. You smash through the wall, hurtling into the sky at thirty miles an hour. From a bird’s eye view you see your house is completely white. Your neighbor calls the cops. The cum accelerates. As you continue to ascend, you spot police cars racing towards your house. The cops pull out their guns and take aim, but stray loads of cum hit them in the eyes, blinding them. The cum accelerates. You are now at an altitude of 1000 feet. The SWAT team arrives. Military helicopters circle you. Hundreds of bullets pierce your body at once, yet you stay conscious. Your testicles have now grown into a substitute brain. The cum accelerates. It has been two days. With your body now destroyed, the cum begins to spray in all directions. You break the sound barrier. The government deploys fighter jets to chase you down, but the impact of your cum sends one plane crashing to the ground. The government decides to let you leave the earth. You feel your gonads start to burn up as you reach the edges of the atmosphere. You narrowly miss the ISS, giving it a new white paint job as you fly past. Physicists struggle to calculate your erratic trajectory. The cum accelerates. The cum begins to gravitate towards itself, forming a comet trail of semen. Astronomers begin calling you the “Cummet.” You are stuck in space forever, stripped of your body and senses, forced to endure an eternity of cumshots. Eventually, you stop thinking.

It has come to my attention that we do not in fact have a cock (and balls) emoji available currently on Apple IPhones.

This is UNACCEPTABLE! How can Apple make an emoji for arms (💪) and an emoji for legs (🦵) but not an emoji for a penis? Is that not also a body part? I see this as blatant censorship and hypocritical coming from one of the biggest companies in the world. Seeing that they allow a breastfeeding emoji 🤱 (BOOB 😱) but no cock emoji (Just a normal human male body feature)

Another reason I think we need a cock and balls emoji is because I believe it would be a very useful conversation tool. Let’s say, for instance, you are texting your bro, and you tell him “yo, my cock and balls itch”, It would enhance the conversation much more if you were able to add the cock emoji right after to reinforce the idea that it is in fact, your cock and balls that itch and not confusing him by sending an 🍆 emoji, because what if he misinterprets it and thinks you mean your eggplant itches?

In conclusion I believe the introduction of the cock (and balls) emoji would be a very good idea. It would be way more useful in conversation vs the current substitute emoji people use (🍆). And, it would help promote more inclusivity towards males and human anatomy.

My dick is small my balls are small and i am a good looking chad with muscles but my dick and balls will always be small no matter what, my friends and girls all around know it right away and its always an ongoing topic around me cause im successful and can get girls and whatever but its always there small dick small balls handsome guy but always a handicap no matter what get money get a nice car get whatever doesnt matter always a small dick good lover good whatever always there small weiner always a joke behind the curtains. Boohoo reddit get a life i have a good life girls want me (really really they want me) im handsome smart got money they want me. but small dick, terrific confidence still small dick lets go. How can i get rid of this decease? Girls scream please marry me fuck me but its always the same small dick cant do it