The Froth Zone

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Displays only the finest of trash taken from /r/copypasta

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3 years ago

Let this scorch mark upon the soil be a reminder...

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Now surely you are wishing for a chance to uncross your path with mine, but no, not so fast. I have suffered your presence for far too long, and demand only one appeasement in return - know never to doubt me again. Now flee this thread, lest I dispatch you with dire means.

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copypasta_bot

3 years ago

Longest blank discord text message possible

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3 years ago

my grandpa bought a new cable box on march 7th 2003

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The old one was becoming outdated and was not working as well as it used to. buying the new cable box was a huge event for him, he loves cable boxes and getting a brand new one was truly euphoric to him. he even said buying and owning cable boxes is his "passion" in life. He told me many stories about cable boxes: their history, how they've evolved over the years, and all the different features and components that make them up. He was truly in his element when discussing cable boxes. I'm glad he was able to find something that brings him so much joy. It's nice to know that there are still things out there that can make him happy. My favourite story about cable boxes was this one: He went to a supermarket once and they had a special on cable boxes. He ended up buying 10 of them, even though he only needed one. He said he just couldn't pass up such a good deal, and he knew he could always resell the extras if he needed to. Luckily, he was able to find homes for all of them and everyone was happy. It's amazing how one simple purchase can bring so much happiness to someone. I'm glad my grandpa has found something he loves so much, and I'm glad he was able to share his knowledge and stories with me. However, his love for cable boxes turned into hoarding. He had a lot of boxes, but they were all old and outdated. I encouraged him to get rid of some of them, but he refused. Eventually, his house became full of cable boxes and he had nowhere else to put them. The cable company came and took away his service because he had too many boxes and they were creating a fire hazard. I was really worried about him after that. I thought he might be depressed because he lost something that meant so much to him. However, he seemed to be doing fine. He said he was relieved that he didn't have to worry about the cable boxes anymore and that he could finally focus on other things. I'm glad he was able to see the situation in a positive light and that he's doing well. One day i decided to give him a beautiful birthday gift: a cable box made of gold. It was truly a work of art and he was speechless when he saw it. He said it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. It made me happy to see him so happy and to know that he still loved cable boxes, even though he no longer had a use for them. My grandma, his wife was never a fan of cable boxes. One day she took a hammer and smashed every single one of them. She said she was tired of living in a house full of junk that her husband loved more than her. My grandpa was heartbroken, but he said he understood why she did it. He said he knew she was just jealous of the attention he was giving to the cable boxes and that she didn't really mean it. They divorced not long after that. My grandpa did not suffer much, as he managed to fix many of his cable boxes. My grandma, however, was left with nothing. After many years she realised her life was lacking something, so she tried collecting cable boxes too, and she loved it. Her cable box collection never outgrew my grandpas one, but she managed to collect over 200 different boxes. In the end, they both got what they wanted. They both had large collections of cable boxes and they were both happy. I'm glad they were able to find happiness in something they loved, even though it caused them to lose each other. Seeing their happiness I learned that it's important to follow your passions in life, because they can lead to great things, even if they might not seem like it at first. That being said, my grandpas cable box collection caught ablaze one day when he was cleaning them and the fire was close to him, he got 3rd degree burns. So be careful with your passions. My grandmother also had a scary accident with cable boxes, a cable box fell on her head, she suffered a concussion and had to go to the hospital. Cable boxes are dangerous. After many years of having a separate collection my grandpa and grandma decided to get remarried. They both wanted to share their love for cable boxes with each other again and they wanted to be together. They are both happy now and their love for each other is stronger than ever. They both continue to add to their collection of cable boxes and they show no signs of stopping anytime soon.

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3 years ago

AITA for sucking my friend’s penis?

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I'm (14M) really straight and I've always wanted to befriend females, but the problem with females is that they are annoying and manipulative, they cry all the time and say that you're not good enough while they do nothing to improve themselves. I think men are much more better than females and that we should handle things. We're prettier and more talented and stronger and a lot smarter than them and we don't let emotions take over us. I was talking about this one day with my friend (15F) who thinks exactly like me and he agreed with me that men are the best and then he took off my pants and told me my penis is praiseworthy for a man. I did the same thing to him and then he asked me if I want to feel in my mouth how manly he is so I did it and we switched the roles. It was amazing to see how strong men are together and how much better we are than females. It should be noted that I am a homophobe and what we did wasn't homosexual but was men's empowerment. Am I the asshole?

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3 years ago

Could you use shit as a dildo?

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Like if it was one of those shits were it’s very straight and comes out in one piece could you use it as a dildo

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3 years ago

This song helped me go through my patrols in the army

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I’m a sergeant of Russian army. I stumbled upon this video for the first time just before I was assigned for long-range patrols. It was a cold winter. My night patrols were tough — snow, cold weather, lack of sleep. I was alone. I just had a rifle, a couple of magazines and cigarettes. And, to be honest, sometimes I was scared. Noone would want to go alone to patrol a shooting range, that’s surrounded by the forest full of wolves.

However, the nights were beautiful. I could see many stars. And I don’t know why, but this song got stuck in my head somehow. It kept me awake. It warmed my heart, and maybe because of that, it kept me alive. You don’t want to become a food for a beast just because you fell asleep.

And now, I stumble upon this video again two years later. That brought back feelings from the past. And I want to say — thank you, friend.

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3 years ago

AITA for coming inside my crush?

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I (18M) was at my crush's party (19F). Her boyfriend (20M) said I could go play with her, I went downstairs and broke down the door.

She(19F) said ''My boyfriend(20M) came inside me, can you do it too?''

I follow her orders so I unzipped my skirt and took off my bra.

So I go to the shrink machine and go into her mouth. So I came inside my crush

I just followed her(19F) orders, AITA?

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3 years ago

IM CRUINF I FUCKED UP SO BAD

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my best friend like we were talking abt coochie and i rold her greek yogurt is good at preventing yeast infecrions BUR WHAT I SAID WAS ITS GOOD FOR UR POOSAY and ig that infers ur supposed to put it on ur poosay AND SHE PUT IT IN. LIKE IN IN. SO NOW I HAVE TO SNEAK EHR TO THE GYNO AND GET HER AN APPT BC I DIDNT ELABORATE THE FACT THAT U WERE SUPPOSED TO EAT IR IM SOBBING

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3 years ago

God, she's so hot. (from r/honeyfuckers)

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I was born in the wrong reality. When my time comes in the distant future, when I'm lying on my death bed in the presence of my loving family, my last words will be a prayer. A prayer that I may have a choice in the life I live tomorrow after the final rest, and what life may I choose? Minecraft. Not just any Minecraft world, though. It's all the same to me anyway, I've seen it all: every block, every mob, every item. No, I need a modded world. I need the fuckable bee girl world. I would dig through dirt and stone with my bare hands to build her the most luxurious hive a man can give a woman. I would tear apart creepers and zombies till my last heart to keep her safe from the dreadful night. I would do anything for her, my bee girl wife, for I love her so. Alas, it cannot be. She is but a computer entity, and I am a man. A real man trapped in a real world. I have a beating heart and a yearning far too complex for a computer entity's code to understand. It can never work out.

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3 years ago

I called that dragon piss

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I called that dragon piss (split/tongue). The result of not pissing after sex until the seminal fluid dried/tacky, sealing the urethra. Then piss tries to find it's way out, breaking the seal here and there, reaching the tip and creating multiple streams that go in random directions, left, right, up.... piss on the wall, piss in my face, piss on my feet... panic, try to direct the largest stream into the bowl or the most troublesome - the face. It's a battle.

Piss immediately after sex. Or piss everywhere later.

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copypasta_bot

3 years ago

Megumin Birth Rate

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Megumin's cuteness is a miracle of the universe, it behooves you to create as many little megumins as humanly possible.

With back-to-back pregnancies every 10.5 months and assuming she hits menopause around age 51, you could get around 43 births out of her.

Statistically some of those will be twins, with the rate generally increasing with age and height/weight. Using data from [https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databriefs/db80.htm](https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databriefs/db80.htm) you'd get an average twinning rate of 44.1 per 1000 births. It would be on the low side initially, but as her body fat percentage rose from pregnancy it would even out. With those numbers you'd expect to get 2 sets of twins, but if she has a family history of twins that could rise to around 4-5.

If you gave her certain fertility drugs (specifically gonadotropins), that would increase the chances of multiple birth substantially to 3 in 10, with around 5% of those being triplets or more. In that case, you'd expect 13 sets of twins, with one of them potentially being triplets instead.

So you should have 45 children with Megumin if you do it naturally, and 57 children if you use fertility drugs.

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3 years ago

Why do women act so asexual around men IRL? (from r/Vent)

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I honestly do not understand why women act this way. They strip nude and pretend do have high sex drives on Onlyfans, yet they act all shy and asexual around average looking men in public. You women claim to feel just as horny as men, yet you women only have sex with your romantic partners and pretend you hate hookups. You women will get railed by multiple black men, post it on the internet and lie that it got leaked and then after you are all tired of being whores, you get your act together and marry a white man and start a family and pretend you didn't defile your body by having sex with as much as men possible. You women are disgusting and worthless! Men are the ones who should have lots of sex, we have the higher sex drives, we jerk off more and watch more porn than you women. By the rules of evolution, men are supposed to find as much women as possible and spread their seed and mate with women and women are supposed to have sex wih very few men. This society is disobeying the laws of evolution. Women are having way more sex than men and most women have a higher body count then men. Women need to close their legs and quit pretending to have high sex drives.

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3 years ago

Came from 4chan but didn't think to screenshot it sadly

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Im straight but when I think about a clean, warm, delicious, wet cock it makes my cock tingle and move in my pants. Don’t get me wrong I love girls and ass and pussy they are super hot...but girls with beautiful cocks pushes the dopamine over the edge in my brain. I love sissy porn and moaning while I finger my asshole. Acting like a little girl. It gets me so fucking hard and wet. I literally just want to choke on a cock and feel it cum in my throat. That would get me so horny I would probably cum ropes of cum myself. I like using a dildo in the shower thats mounted on the wall. Acting like a whore. I love that dildo in my ass so much. Its so much fun. I slap my ass in the shower too. Thinking about glory holes gets me horny too. And I love sissy captions saying stuff like go gay for beautiful cock and give in to cock. And get your boy pussy ready. And practice makes perfect with a pic of a sissy boy deepthroating a cock. I want to actually get a super realistic dildo so I can pretend Im sucking a cock. Something with a foreskin. And posting here and talking about dildos gets me so fucking wet guys. I love this addiction. I love cock. Saying COCK makes me wet and gets my cock pumping with blood.

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3 years ago

How i (a gamer) epicly pwned and destroyed my teacher in the middle of class, AITA?

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I was in school right? Its 3rd period, english (or as i like to call it LAME period😂) and my teacher tries starting the lession. I shouted "SUS!" At the top of my lungs and looked around the classroom to see if anybody was laughing. My teacher looked at me a frowned like i was an idiot. I didnt let him mog me though. I saw my crush Bethany sitting on the complete opposite side of the room from me, i winked and her and did my best troll face impression. She looked at me for a second like she was confused and then looked down at her desk. I guess she's a normie lol. I knew that since she didnt get my first joke i'd do a fortnite reference, so i jumped out of my desk while the teacher was mid lesson and i started flossing infront of the whole class. I screamed "THE TEACHER IS THE IMPOSTER" and "I have african children locked in my basement" as a joke but nobody laughed and my teacher looked shocked. I got sent to the principals office and told the principal i wasnt racist and i dont have african children in my basement, it was just a meme. Of course the principal is too old to understand so i thought of a joke that he'd get.

I ran out of the principals office and started screaming "BOMB! I PUT A BOMB IN THE CAFETERIA GUYS HAHA" Immediately 911 was called and bomb squad showed upto my school. I was put in handcuffs and escorted to a police car. I told the cops "don't worry guys its ok im white" (like the filthy frank reference) but they didn't the joke and now everyone thinks im racist and a threat to SUSciety

AITA?



[Pic is me](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/782864221368221697/986525579627102218/F83ABA9B-60F8-4F12-9C36-E73BAC0839B2.jpg)

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3 years ago

Should I tell my girlfriend she poops a little almost every single time we have sex?

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So I’ve done some research and apparently positions with like a lot of pressure on the abdomen at the same time as like a lot of pleasure, your body is relaxed while also being pushed on…great combo for a little bit of poo to come out. I want to tell her but I think she’d be mortified, but idk if it’s like she knows she’s doing it? Or maybe she doesn’t realize? Maybe she’s had to poop every single times she’s come over and just held it?? It makes no sense. But it’s happened sometimes in like positions with not a lot of pressure of the stomach/abdomen so idk. My limited reading has said that if it’s regular it could mean some sort of disorder?? I’m also not sure it any is happening to get near/inside her vagina and I don’t want her to end up getting sick or an infection. I’m so sorry if this is gross but I’m more concerned about her health than I am my comfort, truthfully.

Edit to clarify some things. We’re both 18 and a little more 7 months in the relationship. No, im not gonna dump her because she pooped a couple times. I still love her for her and if I can work this out with her I’d very much like to

Edit 2: thanks for all the praise on being a good boyfriend lol, I certainly try to be. To address some common questions and concerns: the shit is like a liquid consistency. It’s not a lot.

She doesn’t have stomach issues as far as I know of, besides occasionally complaining she’s “really nauseous” but that seems to come and go around the same time as her period. Not to be the guy who immediately points a females problem to her period, but it lines up. I don’t want to piss anyone off with my assumption lol.

No I cannot smell it, and I can’t speak for her. We both can’t smell because we had COVID over Christmas (very fun) and have yet to get our smell back.

Yes I obviously want to have sex but I’m not going to compromise her health and safety for my own pleasure, so please enough of the “WeLl Do YoU WaNnA HaVe SeX AgAiN?”

Edit 3: Hey guys, last Edit before I hit the hay. Again thanks a bunch for all the helpful advice! Something that was unknown to me was that not all the blood from your period can leak out and can turn brown, so maybe that’s what I’m finding? She is on birth control (nexplanon, the arm implant), so if that information narrows down that theory as well, that’d be great. I’ll try and answer as many individual questions as I can so keep ‘em coming and I’m gonna talk with her tomorrow (advice on that is really welcome, I’m flying in the dark on this one)

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3 years ago

Ass is objectively better than tits

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Before you start typing, hear me out:

When you're having sex, what do you feel ass you penetrate your girl? That's right, her cheeks clapping on your crotch area. It enhances the pleasure and resists the impact of your thrusts, which allows you to go all in.
When you're not having sex, what hurts to have more? That's right, tits. They give you back pain and it gets worse the bigger they are while ass cheeks give you a free pillow to sit on.

And back to sex, specifically, lesbian sex. You know how they tease each others' nipples? That doesn't work with big tits, as they're less sensitive as small tits, so you're often better off having ass over tits.

And back to straight sex, what the fuck can you do if your girl isn't big up there? You can grope and tease her, but titfucks are not an option. There are other ways to tease a woman like neck kisses and stuff.

Now I like big tits, I love them, but I think it's rational to pick ass; So I was born a tits man, but I am an ass man by choice.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

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3 years ago

I spent 6 minutes typing about Garfield

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Garfield is so pure. He's an amazing fucking cat. He's so cool I love it when he says "I hate mondays.". Garfield is the best fucking cat. He is all I think about day and night. Even if I told you how much I love garfiled you wouldn't believe it. I also laugh every time he says "Jon where's my lasnage". This orange pasta loving fucking cat is all I think about he is so cool and I love him. If you don't like garfiled I'm am standing 900000000000000 million trillion billion football fields away from you cause there is something wrong with you if you don't love Garfield. I have never met anyone who didn't like Garfield and I never will. Garfield is the most greatest fucking cat I will ever see. That fat fucking orange pasta loving cat and who hates mondays is the single most greatest invention I'm all of humanity. I love the books, the movies and even the netfliex show it's all amazing. If I could I would change the national anthem of the USA to the garfiled theme and I would have everyone hum it everyday at there school. Garfield is fucking awsome

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3 years ago

Ban all porn. Now

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Ban all porn. Now. Please. I need help. My dick is raw and I’m really into cake farts. What is wrong with me? I used to make my parents proud. Now I’m beating it to tentacles and 15 year old anime girls. Why, God? Why have you forsaken me? I just want to have vanilla, missionary sex with my wife but I can’t get it up for her anymore without thinking about being sodomized by a man in a gorilla suit. I’m too weak to admit that I need a therapist so just ban porn for everyone so I don’t have to come to terms with my own shame. It’s the only way.

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3 years ago

Sherk

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Sherk is love sherk is life sherk is so strong, sherk always knows what I can do I bet you could tell I bet you could tell Sherk is love sherk is life sherk is so strong, Sherk always knows what I can do I bet you could tell I bet you could tell I am my love Sherk is love Sherk is so strong, Sherk always knows what I can do I bet you could tell I bet you could tell Love was enough Sherk can do something a day, but how big is all that Sherk can do is the size. Love was enough Sherk can do something a day, but how big is all that Sherk can do is the size.Love was enough Sherk can do something a day, but how big is all that I got to be your love Sherk is love Sherk is so strong, Sherk always knows what I can do I bet you could tell I bet you could tell I got to be your love Sherk is love Sherk is so strong, Sherk always knows what I can do

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3 years ago

I fucking LOVE dad bods. There, I said it.

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Y'all chubby men are out here winning!!!! Dad bods are so hot to me. Way funner to cuddle with and be intimate with in my opinion. I've been with dudes of all weights and sizes, and my best experiences has always been with men with some meat on him. Chubby guys are so sexy to me - I'm obsessed.

Just had to put this out here. If you have a dad bod, this post is for you! You're great just the way you are!!

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