Please DO NOT announce to the server when you are going to masturbate.

This has been a reoccurring issue, and I'm not sure why some people have such under-developed social skills that they think that a server full of mostly male strangers would need to know that.

No one is going to be impressed and give you a high-five (especially considering where that hand has been). I don't want to add this to the rules, since it would be embarrassing for new users to see that we have a problem with this, but it is going to be enforced as a rule from now on.

If it occurs, you will be warned, then additional occurrences will be dealt with at the discretion of the mods. Thanks.

Aaaugh

This is my PlayStation 2, this is my Xbox one, this is my Xbox 360 and this right here is PlayStation 3 and this is what I like to call the Nintendo Shitcube, and the reason I call it the Nintendo Shitcube because, IT’S A PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT!

The original Nintendo entertainment system sucked because it had to perform a certain amount of blowjobs to the cartridges in order for the games to work.

And then Nintendo they released the second console, the Super Nintendo, now that was a very good, now that was a good system, that was a very good system, the games did not freeze and the games they did not stop when you were playing, and then, then Nintendo released the third console the Nintendo 64 now that was also a very good system, it didn’t have full motion video, it wasn’t bad for 90’s system, and then Nintendo releases the fourth videogame console.

The Nintendo Shitcube now the reason I call it the Nintendo Shitcube is because, take a look at the fucking game, this is a Nintendo GameCube game, this looks like a fucking chocolate chip cookie, and plus, what the fuck, graphics by ATI, ATI my ass, alright the Nintendo GameCube it has good graphics, nice hardware, over graphics over hardware, they couldn’t the, they made the fucking system so small that you can’t even play DVDs on it, now the PlayStation 2 sold more than the GameCube because it had DVD, drive.

Like I said the Nintendo GameCube, it has good graphics good hardware but the PlayStation 2 is way, much more better than this god awful piece of shit, and plus, if you look underneath your GameCube, you’ll see that, it has a separate modum the modum is so separately, but in the PlayStation 2 it had a built in modum, now WHY THE FUCK WOULD NINTENDO MAKE A MODUM FOR NINTENDO GAMECUBE IF IT CAN’T PLAY ONLINE MULTIPLAYER GAMES.

And now I’ll show the Nintendo Shitcube’s wireless controller, this is the controller’s wireless receiver, you just put it on the GameCube like this as you would like a regular GameCube controller and, you have to put in batteries on the back and press on and, but even when, even when you have the batteries inside, guess what, the Gamecu-, the Shitcube’s wireless controller it’s not good, it doesn’t even work.

A piece of fucking shit

The Nintendo Shitcube, it cost 120 dollars, do not buy it there are a lot of things you can buy with that kind of money, and who would like to buy the Nintendo Shitcube, nobody likes it

I (42m) have recently developed the hobby of running over cyclists every time I see them with my 2007 Toyota Tacoma. It’s nearly addicting to squash them like fruit flies that came from the kitchen window, except they’re 34 and came from a fatherless upbringing. In this current time, cyclists are becoming more common in my city, which is good since I have even more to catch! The higher the gas prices get, the more cyclists I run over. But, my wife (30f) said that it’s a tad bit unethical, since the majority of them die after a bit. The police also give me a warning but they never actually enforce it, so it confuses me. Reddit, Am I The Asshole?

It’s Morbin time!
# FAQ
## What does this mean?

It’s time for Morbin.
## Why did I do this?

There are several reasons I may deem you morbin-able to be worthy of being morbed. These include, but are not limited to:
- I am very Morby
- I see you being morbin-able
- You morbed me first
## Is Morbius THE movie of all time?

Yes
## I don't believe I deserved to be morbed upon. Can you un-morb me?

Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I put morb-juice back into my morbenis. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me some thick morb-milk explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to fucking requests/comments within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of people gets morbed, and you are is likely no exception.

## How can I prevent this from happening in the future?

Accept the reality that I stick my Morbenis into your morbussy and move on. But learn from this mistake. You were a mistake because I forgot to wear a morbondom whilst fucking your morb-hole. I will continue to morb your morbussy until you improve your conduct.

Remember: morbing you who morbed me first is a right, not a privilege.

FUCK YOU, STEAM. Fuck you. fuck you, Steam, fuck you, Garry, fuck you, Gabe. I fuck the fucking steam moderators of fucking steam steamfuking(no)works. FUCK YOU, STEAM WORKSHOP. I FUCK YOUR WORKSHOP ISSUES. LUA ERRORS? PAY ME MONEY OR DIE, YOU FUCKING, STUPID, PIECE OF SHIT. FUCK YOU. I want you and family died in suffering. I killed your 12 woman. I killed your mother. I killed your god. Eat my shit and lick my balls.

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͖̞̱̣̭̫̠͔̘̠̼̎̀̉̈́́̆̎̐̇̎̀̈́̈́̏̔̾͠͠͝█̶̨̧͙̗̼̪̟̱̣̼̦͇̠̥̞͕̗̩͎̻̣̻̺̩̻̦̟̫͓̝̱̥̱̖́̌̌̄̓͗̄͒̓̈̒̈̏͐̀̆͒̆͐̔͘̕̚͜͜͝█̷̢̡̧̨̧̧̛̛̟̗̞̬̥̖̠̱̩̫̹̫̼͔̞̫͕̝̪̫̣͉̜͖̱̟̹̯̙̣͕̄̃͑̃͌̅̌̇̈͌̿͆́̈̉͒́͊̃͑͂̅̀͋͌́̿͊͛̒̊̾̚̕̕͜ͅ╔̷̧̨͕͍̬̜̻͕̝̪͔̖̗̳̯̺͎̜̤̗̹͖͕̘̼͉̥̪͎̭̰͔̗̖̘͖̣͕̘̈́̉̇̓̅̈́͛͑͊̅͑̆̄̾͐͌̿́͌́͋͋̾̓̑̋͂̒͋̈̈̚̚̚͜͝͝͝═̵̛̯͖́̆̾̾̍̄̍̇́̔̔̾̃͐̎̑̀̂͊̓̍̒̊̈́͛̌̏́͑͒̋͋͘̕̕͝͝═̷̢̛̛̛̛̳͈̩̘͈͉̹͒̊͑̂͊̈͆̌͆͛̿̆̉͂̈́̑̾̒̄̔̂͛͛̀̌̊̈̃̊͛̅̋͛̏͛͊̚͘͝͝█̷̛͚̀͑̓́͊͂͆̒̈́͘̚█̵̧̨̨̲͙͖̞͉͕͈̬͕̹̥̜̩̼̫͕̳͂̈͊̽͋͘ͅ║̴̛͍͈̝͈̬̮͉͉̳̤̰̱̟̠̌͗̐̓̿̊́̃̈́̔̂̿̇̍̄͆͂̇̐͆͑͊͛͒̿̾̿̓̇̈̓͗̏̕͘͘͘͜͠͝͠ͅ░̶̡̨̧̡͚̘̣͎͇͓͔̬̹͇̝̖̖͈̖̦̠͖̳͔͕̯̯̤̘̅̓͘͘͜͜͠͠͠͝╚̷̨̢̧̨̛̛̛͚̖̲̞͈̩̭͙̟͙̥̱̠͚̪̟̞̺̟̖̗̻̥̹͉̀̍͊͑͌̉͛͆̈͛̂̏͑̌̍̈́̌͋͘͘̕͜͝ͅ═̴̧̺̤͉̲̝̭̬̥̭̱͎̬̋͛̋̍̈́̎̐̎͌̆͘͜͝ͅ═̶̨̢̧̢̡̛̥̻̯͓͚̘͉̘͇̻̻̲̩̫̯̼͉͔̜̠͇̟̹̺̭̪̜̟̱͔͚̣̻̹̞͎̱̈́̋́̒̄͠ͅ═̷̢͙̼̙͓̮̞̠̼͓̪̲̀̌͗̾̒̽͆͗̍̋̓̀͆̎͛̍̂͆͋́͆̇̓̓͂̋̓͘͘͠͠͠█̷̙̻̱͇̇͒̐̃̈́̃́͒̈̐̌̆̃̊̑̚͝͠͝█̴̧̧̛͚̠̝̪̻̤̲͈̳̯̮̫̪͇̻̙̘̞͙̞̬͔͕̝͎̹̱͙̜̼͈͚̪̦̉̉͋̍͆͒̈́̋̍̉͛͒͌̌͒̀̆̊̇́́̓͒̈́̈́̒͐̾͆́́̕̚̕͝͝ͅͅ╗̸̧̧̨̧̛͔̯͈͖̯͚͖̪̹͈̥̮̘̙̦̻̗̭̠̲̤̫̜̤̲̺̫̲̼̙͚͕̦͂̊̿̓̈͊͆̿̉̂̉̆̊̐̑̂̄̈͊̈́̈́̚͝͝█̸̨̢̛̩̫̮̹͖̭̺̺͙̩̮̳̞̲̤͗́̅̆̓͐̃̎͑̀̋̈́̉̓̄̋͒͌̀͑̆̓͑̏̓̂͌̈́̾̔̇̚͘͠͠͝ͅ█̷̡̨̢̨̛̖̮̦̯̦͍̰̰̪͕̬̻̰̣̝͎͎͎͔̫̊̔̐̍̆͊̔̑͌͒͂͒̓̾̍͌̊̓͒̓͋͑̋̓̓̂̊̃͛̌̏͌̍͘͜͜͠║̷̮̤͔͓͎͖̱̗̠͇̜̳̖̮̗̬͙̹͔̜̜̬̹̯͛͒͋͑̚ͅ░̵̨̛̮̙̹̪̣͙̪̩͈̰̜̗̠̘̱͕͖̺͚͈̠̤̼̳͕̝̂̽̀͛̒̒́̆̀́́͛̒̿͑̇̒̐͂́̈́̒̆͋̔͛͆́̆͐͛̑̕͘͜͝͝░̶̛̛͙͉̙͇̞͖̳̪̦͖̳̘̘̖͇͉̻̥̖̖̖̬͚̖̃͛̀̈́͐͆̆̄͗̈́̅͌̇̏̈̽̂̆̓́̕̚͜͝͝͝ͅ█̴̨̢̧̛̻̖͙̹̜̝͚̠̘͙̱̗͔͍̱̪̼̩̞̤̪̯͙̖̗̺͉͇̞̬̦̱̱̲̘͊͒̄̏̀̀̑́̍̄̌̂̔͐̓̓̇̆͂͛́͑͊̑͂̃̓̊̅͆̀́̍̕͜͜ͅͅ█̵̢̧̢̛̛̠̥͚͈̜̻̦̬͕͎͓͇̗̲͖̪̣͇̮̳̙̣̫͈̳͔̜̥͇̥̹̙̬̣̪̭̙̾̄̐̅̍́͛̎͐̉͋́̊̈́̿̈́̔͂̈́̂̎͜͜ͅͅ║̴̬̰̖̲̲͈̳́̀́͆̚█̸̡̡̡̨̧̨̪̬͍͎̝̺͖͓͙̓̾̀̐̅́͂͋̃͗̑͆̏̈́͒̋́̀̒͋̔͆̋̃̕̕͘͝͝█̵̞͋̈͒̈́̇̃̉̒͂̈́̾̍̃͋̒̉͐̐̐̇́̀͌̆͊̚̚͘̚͘̚̕͝╔̷̢̢̢̢̛̺͖͖͍͇̳̗̗̼̹̲̰͍͉̙̳̯͇̪͇̝̼̬̗̣͇̮̣̣̺͉̬͉̮̠͕̆͊̎̑̍͌̋̋̃̆͊͂̽̌͐̑̏͛̍̀͘̕͝͝ͅ═̸̢̛̤̺̳̠̮̖͇̉̈́̆̊̍̎̒̈́͋́̑̌̓̎̄̿̊̎̈́̅̌̿́͆̌̈́̐̀͊̑͌̚̚̕̕̚͠͠═̵̡̨̨̛̲͔̤̼̝͇͎̩̌̆͗̾̈͗̈̅͌͊̿̔͒̂̊̐̀̇̿̉͐̈́͒̀̊̓̀̾̈́̍͠͠█̶̡̡̢̧̨̖̟̝̹͖̜̠͈̥̙̠̙̺͍͔̮̲͚͚̝̣͎̘͔̰̾̒̉̈́͒̑̋͌̃̉̃͜ͅ█̸̢̢̧̛̦̗͓͇̺͓̤͎̳͇̖̬̬̮̭̳͍͈̼̟̘̠̊̀͒͐̒̔̒̄̈́͑́̇͂͜ͅ║̸̧̢̧̠̫̟̬̬͈̣͓͖̣͙̣̲̱̤̤̖̖̳̠̰͍͚͉̱̩̭̝͙̥͔̩͎͗͛́̍͒̑̋̈́͒̅̈̆̓͐̈́̃̇̇̀́͋͗̾̐̌̓̒̿̇̈́̔̋̈́̆̈́͊̓͂͑͜͜͜͝ͅͅ█̶̡͇̲̭̦͎̮͔̜̤̘̎̅̅̅́͐͒̄̍̽̑̃́̈́̒͑͗̌̓͘͠͝͝█̶̢̢̱͇̮͓̩̜̪̞̺̗̰̺̪͍͍̠̭͍̘̘̭̥͎̺͙͙̙̭̣͊̇͒̍͗̎̑͗̌͑̽̀̔͛͌͑̓́̈̉́̓̇̔̇͊͑̋̍̏̎́͘̚͜͜͠͝╔̷̨̡̛̛̲͖͚̯̥͓̠͇̗̻̉̐̇̓̾͊͒̎̔́̇͆̋̆̃͠═̴̢̪̱͕̠̘̲̞̘͔̻̟͎̫̹͎̮̟̙͔̱͍̻̣̟͔͈̀̀̀̓̄̊̈̎̐̀̊̈́̍͂̾͘̕̚̚̕͜͝͝͝ͅ═̴̡̡̡̢̨̝̭̰͉̹̻͔̹͙̖̥̗͓͔̼̜͓̬̥̟̠͔͍̳̰̪̝̠̖̑́̈́̏̕͜ͅ█̷̨̯̯͍̹̬̙͍̙̞͈͈̲̥̜̾̇̓̀́͋͆̽̎͛̔̏̐̀͌̂̆̎̀̏̐̕͘͝ͅ█̷̢̨̡̛̖̲̰̣̪̲̼̫̩͓̈́̑̓̾͐̊͑̔͊̽̏̓́̀́͛̔̅͋͋̎̄̓̅̂́̈́͛͂̅̌͒̐̈́̆̊͐͂̎̚̚̚ͅ║̷̵̨̢̡̡̧̨̢̛̬͙͇̞̻̰͓̳̘̱͈̪̥̙̫̤͙͇͈̲͙̤̬̪̼͕͔̞̟̹̖̥̼͈̘͕͉͔͙͕͉̬̯͚̝̫̥͙̱̠̤̙̪̝̫̘̗͙͇̥̜͖̗̯̖͕̖̝͆̍̾̉͋͌͊͌̈́̂́̀̽̅̓̎̑̌̽̑̆̊̎̆͂̒͋͂̂̑̈́̍̒̊̈́͘̚̚͜͜͝͠͠͝ͅ█̴̡̛̛̛̛̮̩͉̺̦͈̾̄̈́͐̑͒͋̆̎̆̂̀̒́̓͌̆̅͗̍̌̀͂͌͛̓͆͑̔́̕̕̚͘͝͝█̷̡̢̢̛̛̝͍͈̝͇̹̯͙̣͖̖̜͎͇̺̣̰͙̗̖͕͙̯͈̼̱̦̼̓͆̍̀́̿̈̓̿͂̒̿͋̄̂͊̇̕̚͜͜ͅ█̸̢̡̢̢̨̢̛̻̝͖̞̣̙̣̯̭͖̲̺̥̦̘̙͎͎̥͎̙̤̟̝̙͚̐̋͑́̇̆̎́̄́̅͆̄̇́͆͂̍̆͂͋͒͑̈̐̍̈́̿̀͆͒͐͂̕̚̚̕͠█̶̧̢̙̤͔̩͕̥̹̯͙̗̱̼̙̝̺͕̤̬͉̗̬͓̣̣͚̜͕̗̗̩̜̞̠̼̗͙͇̳̦̆̈́͆͗̍̈́̌͂̃̾͌́̃̉̆̈́̎̈́̋̐̎̈͘͝͝█̴̛͎̮̮͚̰̼͖͕̗̖͆̾̑̏͗̈́͒͑̌̈́̄̈́͂̈̈́́͋̂́̃̏́͘̚̕͝͝͝ͅ█̵̡̭̠͉͙͖͈̻͇͇̘͙̫̱͓̮̺̼͎̲̦͕̉̀̌̌͛̔̂̄̈́͒̾͊͑͑͐̽̉̄̀̕͝ͅ╔̵̢̛͚̦͍͇̼̗̫̦̤̯̤͕͈͇̦͈͇̪̝͎̉̊͌̽͑̔͗͐̇̑͌̀̏̀̏͗̄̍̂̈́̈́͐́̓͘͜͜͝͝͝͝ͅ╝̷̧̢̨̙͕͎̠̻̞̺̯̗̼͔̯͇̳̙͔͚͈̞̟̼̬̰̜̺͙̙̋̄̀̊́̿̽͐͌͊̓̅̄́̌̾͒̑̚͘̕͘͜͜͠͝ͅͅ█̴̡̧̢̲͓͔͖̺̟̪͖̣̮̘͉̝̩͎͕̗̼̹̝͙̈́ͅ█̵̮̘̉̇̅̑͛̈́͒̂̀̉́̉͛̾̑͐͛̀̇̍̚̚͠͠ͅ║̴̡̡̭̩͉̰͕̘̘̹̼͈̪̬̖̥̭͉̺̭̯̦̜͙̣͇͚̥̰̞̰̑̇́̈́͊͑̌̀̉̄̑͊̐̓̍̀͑̍̾́̆̓̒̇̋́̅͂̽̏͝͠░̴̨̮̖͈͔̮͙̬͇̮͇͔̥͖͕̒̾̓̍͋̚░̶̡̨̡̡̛͖͉̫̦̟̦̼̠͓͙͎̮̠̘͕̜̽̆̀̈̌̊̇́̏̏̆̓̀̓̈́͋̈̏̆̾͋̂͌̉̑́͊̌̚͘͝͝͠͠█̷̛̜̞̪̲̝̲̩̤̬̣͊͆̎̿̒̐̔́̈͆̾͛̑̃̽̎̾█̸̢̛̮̉̾͋̎͐̈́́́͒̀͊̆͌̋̊̽͒̅̀̂͐̈́̋̒̏̓̾̑͛̃͂̀̿̚̕͘̕͝͠͝║̵̢̛̛̦̰̣̙̳͉͓̥͎̟͈̥̘̰̦̯̖̮̻̫̬͙͖̗̠͉̦̼̜̠̮̑́͆̊̋̐́͒̂̏̿͗̇̉͂̄̿̂̑̈͛͜͠͝█̸̢̧̛̯͍̤͍̭̠͓̠̱̠͉̪̲̫̖͈͔͙̱̘̝͓̗̭̠̼̪̤̟͉̙̞͓͕̬̩͕̲̙̂̾̄́̏̎̾͐̈́̍͗͒̑̓͋͑͒͋̌́̋͋̏̐̇͌̍̇̇͂́̏̀͆̅̎͂̒̐͒̚͜͜͝͠ͅ█̶̢̯̤̍͆̀́̽̌̉͗̿́͑̋̆̑͑̀̉̽͋̌͊͑̈́͘̕͝█̴̰̦̭͖̹̞̱̩͇͎̜͉̖̗̙̖̳͍̼̞̩̈́͆̏͆̔̒̏̈́̚͜͝█̸̧̡̡̼̭͔̥̯̱̞̯̟͖͈̻̗̳̞̬͇̣̺̯͍̯͇̯̱̪̩̬̣͚͈̠͎̳̱͖̺̦̯̋̇͗́̉̌̀̈̍̿̌̓̽̿̉͐̽͊̄̈́͒̂̉͆͂́̓̄̇̔̅̋̚͜͜͠͝͝͝█̴̨̡̨̛͚̩͚̼̖͚̭͍͍̼̖̬̣̤̜̣̯̀̓̑̌̏̌͊͛̄͑͂̇̏́̓͗͘͘͝͝█̷̨̧̨̡̨̙̰̝͓͓̬̱̰̗̥̞̣̮̼̞̝̦̱͚̬͈̰͈̦̞̞̠̬̥̣͚̻͎͎̱̹̖̜̎́̍̽̎͂̈́̎̊̑̎̋͛̐̆̅̓̏́̾̈́̓̋╔̵̢̛̛̩͍͖̹͙̥̋̑͋͐̒͂̐͑̅͒̒̐͌̎̀̿͆̈̂̾̆̍̀͐͑̈̕͘̕̕̚͘͠͝╝̶̨̢̧͇͔̼̟͕̹͙̬̪͉̞̼͔̖̼͖̮͉̘͍͈̝͍̮̼̯̱̺̤̱͉̞͖̞͕̜̟̱̤̯̃̈̆̋͋͛̆͘͘̕͜█̵̡̡̧̢͍̟̤̲̮̙̜̺͕̜̰͈͉̬̤̤͇̠͎̺͕̣̀̐̂̀̃͌̏̎͗̍̆̃̒͒̇̒́̈͗̈́̅̉̓̓̃̈́͊̉́͘͝ͅͅ█̵̧̮̣̝̈́̉█̶̨̙̹̯̖̻͇̭̹̥͚͍͍̦̘͇̘͕̮̈́̇̍̂̿̾͌̉́̿̍̓̋̒̂͗̑̓͂͆͆̾̾̈́̈̀͆͑̆̏̓͆͘̕̚̚̚̚͘͜͜͠͝█̸̺͈̬̦͖̜̳͍̝̦̝̿̄̆̂͐́̎̾̅́̓̽̀͗͋̀͑̆̿̌̎̀̉̀̽̈́͗̑͆̈͛͘͜͠█̷̨̨̢̢̠̺̩̯̙̩̥̝̮͚̜̩͕̞̮̬̂̌͊̽̽͂͗̍͑̒͂̐̄̈͊̓̓͆̽̐̔̓̄̀̌̎̚͘͘͘̚̚͝█̴̛̛̤̼̮̮͉̦̫̩̖̜͈̰͉̘̩͎̫̝͇͇̤̭͖̺̹̔̈͐̈͒͆͗̐̽̀͑̈́͌̉͘͜͝͝╔̷̡̖͎͙̿͑̀́̄͊͛̉̐͑̊͆̈́̂́͊͆̂̾͋̃͛̔̀̓̇̏̏̔́̔͋̌̆̈͌̓͌̓̕͝╝̸̢̘͈͍̝̉́̂́͌̑̄̈́͗̆̒̿̾̿̍͌́̍̕͘͝█̷̧̢̪̝̥̩͚̰̋̒̀̄͗͑̽̾͗̀̀̆̿̽̓͑̏̀̌̓͐͆̌̿̔͐̒̔̃̈́̒͒͂͐͐̇̈͋̄̈́̽̆̿͛ͅ█̶̛̣̳̺̔͋͌̽̽̀̈̿͛̾͆͑̉̿̃̐̂̒͗̈̊̔̇̅̒͛̎̊̕͝║̷̨̡̛̛̜̹͙̦͖̝̩̫̜̗͖̞̱͚̟͔͙̹͙̫̟̤͔̘̜̺̣̹͎̞͙̖̩̰̟͑̄̀̍̒͗̆̃̓̉̓́̇̿̊͊̉̌̍̋̿͒́̉̀̕͜͠͠░̴̧̧̧̡̡̢̦͓͉̱̭͇̱̱͚̮̻̩̝̥̯̼̦͈̬̲͚͉͊̎̌͋́̈́͊͛̄̒͒̑̆̀͒̀̉͆̉̕͝͝͝͠͠░̶̡̧̲̼̰͈͉̳̳̦͉̹̖̼̯̗̘̪̲̜͚́̔́̊͌̂̍̄ͅ█̷̨̧̨̨̨̛̘̟̙̣̼̪͖̮̳͍̺̥̻̜̯̹̘͙̖̟͍̳̰̦̮͉̘̙͚̗̜͗̌̃̍̊̀̐͐̉̑̇͊̈́̆̍͋̔̀͑̇̔̈́̚͝ͅ█̴̨̨̹̝̙̳̰̖͎̣̬̩̤̥͔̠̩̠̯̩̖́̈́̇͂̋̅̓̅̌̈́̇̈́̚͝͠║̵̛̛͚̺̘͎͔̬̖͈͈̗̩̇̏́̑͑̒̿͜█̶̡̨̢̧̢̛̖̺̤̻̼͉͎̰̟̳͕̰̫͕̺̱͓̫͎̲̼̟̣̳̫̻͎̣͔̦̊̌͐͛͑̓͑̓̎̒̀̋̈́͂̈́̄͒̂̆̋̌͐̒̀̈̒͆͌̚͘̕̕͘͜͝͝͝͝█̶̛͔̥̘̲̪̏̈́̾̀́̄̀̍̌̿́͌̈́̅̓̆̿͗͐̇͜͜͝͝͠͠║̸̝̘͒̎͛͑̄̀͂̏̏̈́͗͂̈́̈́͗̀̏̽̾͊̃̇͊̄͑̚̕͘̚͜͝͝͠͝░̶̨̛̦̀̇̏̐̉̊́̄̈́̏̓̐̓̎̏̏̉̇̓̾͌̉́̍̏̊̐͘͘͝░̴̥̹̼̼̜̜̠̫̜̝̱̗̼̙̟͎͓̐̋̑̈́͂̈́̄͂̍́͐̓̏͗̏͆̍͂͋́͊̂̐̍͌̉̔̆̽̔͋̐̑̾̇̑̽̕͘͜͠͝ͅͅ█̷̨̧̛̩̦̪̞͔͓̯̞̥̲̗͉͎̜̦͉̻̜̤̯̝̰͍̞̰̙͚͔̹̱͍̆̓̊̏͜͜█̷̛̮̗̦̙͕̗̻̹͙͎̭̫̱̖̠̪̹̯̬̙̔̽̑̆̌̃̆̇̓̉̈́̈́͗̔̏̏̾͆̈́̑̀̅͗́̈́̾̈́̾͂͑̄͗͊͑̍̎̌̋͝͝͝͝ඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞ

Stop Thirsting over vecna. I open reddit, its kinky vecna fanart. I go on deviantART I can't even see a naked woman because all of it is just vecna in a thong or lingerie.
I open discord and the first meme I see has a close up of Vecna's slimy cheeks covered in pustules.
I open my fridge and see the calamari from last week and i think to myself vecna's tentacles would feel nice invading my throat.
I'm boutta jack off and i look at my penis and I'm like vecna's rope dong is probably flexible enough to wrap around mine AAAAaaaahhhthfhdhj

That's what the title says,it's destroying it,but lets go back a little bit

When i was 12 years old i started puberty and started to give my dick more attention,then i asked myself "is it small?" So i measured it up and i was 3 inches,and a tear fell off my eye,i thought i would be small forever,then i did some research and found out it stops growing around 17 years old,that made me happy.

About a year passed and i was 13,my meat was 6'3 inches,and it started to get difficult.
Boners in class were a nightmare,and when i went out to run,i couldn't wear grey pants, because it would highlight it too much.once i went out with some grey Nike sweatpants,and everyone who looked at me watched my crotch before watching my face,maybe they thought i was an adult because i was 5'10 at the time.

2 years passed,I was 15 and my pp is 7'6 inches,and it was hard to go out without it getting highlighted,it was impossible to hide a boner and having sex with my girlfriends was hard si ce they couldn't take it all,i was pretty depressed and when i got a boner my head would start to spin.once my stepmom caught me wanking and she screamed,later when I apologized she said it was as big as my dad's and that she wanted to try it,i activated my virginity Shield and told what she did to my dad,they divorced.

Now I'm 19,my schlong is 9 inches and it's so difficult, don't get me wrong,sex is great,but i can't shove it all in,i start seeing black when i get hard because there isn't enough blood in my body.

I'm in the marine corps and when i go in the shower other guys start calling me big dick "my name" and it hurts,some guys asked me if I could fuck them and i said I'm not gay,some guys purposefully drop the soap in front of me,some other guys tried to convince me to go to a glory hole,i agreed,but then i saw through the wall that it was the brother in law of my brother (why is this happening to me),i ran away and our drill sergeantess(?) Is a hot ass milf and she convinced me to have a threesome with her and her husband,i reluctantly agreed, fortunately we all focused on her,but i felt something in my ass when i fell asleep,and i really don't know what to do, people see me as a walking giant schlong,I've tried casting for porn but the girl had pain in her pusi and the other actor started crying because compared to mine it was small,so they fired me,i don't know what to do, please, please,help me

Father of lies
Cum in disguise
Your cum won't last
There's a snake in my ass
The cum-fathers secret stash
Cum-stomp me flat
I'm going to fuck your dad
Cumming high into the morning sky
Vape cum from my bum till I die
Watching Arthur with a cock in my ass
Riding hard
Eating ass master-class
Sacred cum blade
A fuckling crusade
Fatal cum--theft
Give me cum or give me death
Elon's Musk
Jesus Crust
Stealing donations from the Cum-Czar's trust
A cum smoothie gulped smoothly
Consume the cum chalice
Fuck everyone named Alex
David Hayter
Cum Crusader
The Holy Cum Wars
Razor-blade Masturbator
Margaret Thatcher
The Cum Snatcher
Father drowned
Going down on the cum clown
Prolapse pounding
Toothpick sounding
Cum baking
My nipple-pussy is aching
Cum fooler
Semen drooler
Forbidden cum-spice
Your shit-box looks nice!
Life is a cage, and death is the key
All your cum are belong to me
Normalize crying over spilt cum
Making cum-angels with my son
I fucked a fairy in half
How many holes does a human have?
My butt and cunny are in agony
Castration in the sky
Your penis will fly
Scrotal chambers
Semen sailors
Mommy's cum tax
Grind my balls on an axe!
Cum-scented candle
Cum-broiled eggs
Cum-Christ consciousness
Third-eye, cum spy
Cum-scrote sailboat
Semen speed racer
Off-road cum chode
My uterus came out!
Cum treasurer
Dick measurer
Irresponsible Manager of Cum
A cum-slave, back from the grave
The price for breaking a cum-oath
James Hector
Cum key-lector (or collector, vote in comments)
I tripped in the cum-keeper's crypt
Cum feeder
Moist meter
Sans Undertale, the cum reaper
Fucking a skeleton, right in the pussy
The Dark Souls of cum
Cum-framed, and cum-blamed
Cum-drowning awareness day
Brewing cum-fuel after school
Your nipples are crunchy
The tragic cum-sponge
Your cum is fading...
Sweep up the cum flakes, Joan

I shitted in my pants (woo)
I am for reeaaaaal
Never meant to make my booty shot
I apologize I shit my pants
I shitted in my pants (woo)
I am for real
Never meant to make my booty shit
I apologize I shit my pants
I’m gonna go to the bathroom because I shit my pants
And I’m not gonna wipe because I can’t
I feel the diarrhea spreading through my legs
That’s why people say I sound like I’m 8
The people don’t know the pain
The pain of diarrhea going through ur legs
I don’t wanna wipe my ass no more it’s too late
The diarrhea spread down my legs
What the fuck
I shitted in my pants (woo)
I am for real

\>wife gets pregnant

\>Dies in childbirth

\>It was a preventable death, but abortion means we would have killed the very alive and conscious fetus, so she has to die instead

\>It's a beautiful baby girl with only 8 birth defects that we detected very early (see previous line)

\>Raise her on $7.25 an hour as a single parent living out of a tent under a bridge

\>She's finally old enough to go to kindergarten, I drop her off on her first day

\>Hear a nuclear explosion go off once I'm home

\>Remember that it's now legal for 14 year olds to buy nuclear missile launchers online, with prime 2-day shipping

\>Governor gets on TV, says something about "kids these days" and their "cyber gaming" and that "maybe if the shooter was part of the NRA things would have been better"

\>He holds his NRA platinum membership card up to the camera and smiles

\>Pepega

I'm cringe brororoo hahaha, you know what? I don't give a fuck if you find it cringe or stupid, I simply don't mf! What? You think I'm cringe talking to you rn? Put yo bitchass up and ill show you what the actual cringe is, MF. You haven't tasted my true cringeness, have you? And if you say I'm cringe again one more time, I'll do nothing, yea NOTHING! because I don't give a literal damn about your dumbfuck opinion. You asshole, you think you are smartass or shit when you talk dry huh? No mf, that just shows how soulless and fatherless you were in childhood. Now, a recap. I don't give a fuck. If you say I'm cringe I'll call all my associates to come there and show you what cringe is, you mf miserable waste of O² and HO². You'll eventually get eradicated from this world since you are fucking dry mf, when you go to a beach, not only you can't get bitches but even beach hates you and transports the water to other places. Since you are fucking dry. Guess what? You are the reason behind climate change, mf. Yes, YOU! Mf, you think you are professional when you say "haha/ok/k" that's just a sign of your brainless head that can't think of a word, motha fuckah!

The first time I received a blowjob from a cat, I was about eleven years old, and I am not going to lie, it was one of the best blowjobs I have ever gotten. Now I might add that this was purely accidental. You see, my parents decided I was finally old enough to be left home alone, so I did what any normal teenager would do: I stripped naked, jumped on the couch and started beating my meat.
So after about two minutes of masturbation, my orange cat Jonesy walks in, and honestly I didn't think much of it, but then I noticed that he was getting kind of curious. He was slowly moving closer and closer to me, and then he proceeded to jump on the couch with me, and then he just kind of sat down and quietly observed me. Now at first, I was kind of creeped out by this, but you know I hadn’t finished yet, so I decided to just ignore him and to continue masturbating, and I have to say that this was the best decision of my life.
You see, after about a few more minutes of watching me, Jonesy decided to help me out. He slowly moved closer and proceeded to put his front paws on my naked thigh, putting his face maybe three to four inches from my penis. Now at this point, I was kind of close to cumming, so I just tilted my head back and closed my eyes. And this is when it finally happened; this is when I felt his tiny little tongue on my rock hard dick, and it was the weirdest, but also the best, feeling ever. His tongue was a bit rugged, yet gentle, and he was moving it so rapidly that I stood no chance: I orgasmed and exploded my seed all over Jonesy’s cute face. Some of the cum even went deep into his throat and he swallowed it with no hesitation. Unfortunately, some of the cum also found its way into his tiny nostrils, causing him to sneeze, which launched the cum into the air, some of it landing on my face and some of it landing on the couch. After the feeling of euphoria settled I slowly returned to reality. I almost couldn't comprehend what had just happened, but I knew I was dead if my parents ever found out, so I proceeded to take a shower with Jonesy and then I thoroughly cleaned the living room, removing every last ounce of cum. My parents never found out.
After this, me and Jonesy repeated this experience on the daily. As most people do, I masturbated every night before sleep, so when all the lights in the house went dark, I cracked the door open and Jonesy would slip in, and we would do the deed. Over the years, our little ritual was also becoming more sophisticated. I would proceed to rub my penis with bacon so Jonesy wouldn't just lick the tip of my penis, but he would rather pleasure me from the balls all the way up to the top of the shaft. We decided to also try penetration. Now, Jonesy's asshole was pretty small and tight, so I had to use butter as lubricant, and I have to say that it went pretty well. His virgin asshole felt amazing, but then about a minute in, Jonesy started to get kind of rowdy. I guess he just couldn't take it anymore, and he quickly turned around and actually chomped at my penis, so yeah that was the first and also the last time we did that.
Unfortunately our story ends abruptly. At the age of eight years old, Jonesy was driven over by my neighbor. The weeks following the accident were the darkest times of my life, but I eventually got over it, and I still occasionally wank my dick in honor of Jonesy.
R.I.P. little buddy.

Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, uncle's neighbour's cat, or even the goddess of blowjob herself. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your dark knob slobbed till your spirit hit the astral realm?

Why? 🥺 I just wanna Amber and Elon to adopt me..😫 They would be my mommy and daddy 🤗 Ever night we would snuggle 🥰 And they tell me a bed time story 🤫 And then we kiss 💋 And then I piss in the bed 😰 And they will be angry 😤 But in the end they forgive me 😲 Because we are family 👨‍👩‍👧

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Morbius. The conflict and charcacter development is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of classic English dramatic literature, most of the weight of the scenario will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Michael’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these scenes, to realise that they're not only humorous- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence, people who dislike Morbius truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the depth in Morbius’ quote: “I am Venom. <snarls> Just kidding, I’m Dr. Michael Morbius at your service.” which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons.

I fucking hate hrothgays so much holy shit its fucking unreal they should just delete the whole fucking race already holyfuck i fucking hate furry faggots so much they should stick to dicking each other and not like fucking try getting a catgirl fuck them fuck hrothfags fuck furry faggots hrothgays are a mistake i fucking hate the furryfaggots so much holy shit i hate lalafells too but hrothgar are even worst shit players shit skills shit parse and shit social skills i bet all the “oh hroths are so nice” are just cope from hroth faggots i hate you faggots so much you should at least try and stick to just dicking your own race like faggots should and just leave catgirls alone fuck you furry faggots fuck you like holy shit stop trying to hit on other races especially females i mean fuck i thought faggots only like other faggots halone help me it really fucking disgusts me and i literally retch and puke everytime i see a hrothgar in my screen to the point doctors recommend me to voidlist every single hrothgar i meet like sorry not sorry but if you dont want to get voidlisted then you should not be playing hrothgar fuck you furry faggots fuck you like holy fuck i fucking hate you bara furry faggots its fucking unreal go kys right now like seriously go fucking kys like holy shit i was trying to eb a cute catgirl but you just had to try and get close to her and now she wants to eb you instead of me fuck you faggots fuck you noobs fuck you at least you’ll never be pink parse chad like me you pussy non content casual whore fuck you faggots fuck you furry faggots yiff inhell

Instructions for joining my cult: 1. Become an anti-white liberal like I am. 2. Watch documentaries, like “An Inconvenient Truth”. 3. Think like a tree. 4. Eat all of your meals at the table instead of from a cart. 5. Keep telling lies to the media, as usual. 6. Start acting like a feminist. 7. Start blaming your problems on the patriarchy. 8. Wear lots of black, including your clothes. 9. Stop having opinions of your own. 10. Wear pants that are baggy on the bottom. 11. Go ahead and call me a racist. 12. Don’t think for yourself. 13. Think like a sheep, follow your leader. 14. Become an atheist. 15. Stop reading about the history of the world, like a child. 16. Stop reading anything, including your Bible. 17. Be afraid of guns

Why dont horses have human feet? Well, maybe that image was just a joke.
But what if it wasn't? What if this picture was really a horse with
human-like feet? And if so, would it be likely to have evolved? I think
its possible... We may not know for sure that horses aren't actually
"specifically designed" to be able to have a human-like feet (for
example, I can walk like a human and also not like a human on all
fours!). If there were any doubt that humans share a lot with horses
this should help.

Imagine a hefty bitch bouncing on your hard cock. Then she misses cuz she’s bouncing so hard and your dick splits Blood, and urine can be seen as it pours from the side of your penis on the bedsheets. You call the hospital but you didn’t pay the phone bill... you must drive to the hospital. As you walk in everyone stares at your cock.