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Displays only the finest of trash taken from /r/copypasta
my gf won’t stop method acting as the joker
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sometimes we’ll have an intimate moment and she’ll start laughing like the joker. when we’re out in public she’ll scream “society! batman!” and it’s really freaking me out. at first i thought it was funny but and quirky but she even does it to kids in like walmart. idk what to do this isn’t a joke either, i love her but it’s getting scary.


(Comment on original post from OP): i showed her this post and she started doing the joker voice and said i’ll regret this should i show the video to the police???
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Skyrim cum mod description
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The ultimate cum mod is here.

This is an addon for OStim that adds a number of new orgasm and cum-related things for male and female characters and NPCs.


GIF: A very high level character doing a cumshot. Volume changes the distance so it usually won't fly this far out

For males:
- All males generate cum in their bodies over time. The amount of cum stored is dependent on their level: higher level males can hold more cum.
- In an OStim scene, when a male orgasms, around half of their stored cum is released onto their partner
- Males shoot cum projectiles with sound and collision on orgasm
- A new, advanced decal system is used for applying cum to bodies with multi-layer support

For females:
- All females have a random womb volume assigned to them
- In an ostim scene, if a male ejaculates inside a female vaginally, her womb will get filled up with cum
- Cum automatically drains away from the womb over time
- If a female's womb gets filled up, her stomach will begin to inflate. Adding in even more cum in this state will inflate it further
- When a female orgasms, she has a chance to spray squirting effects.

Pressing Right-Ctrl will pull up an onscreen bar to show you how much cum is inside your character

Male cum storage
The amount of cum a male stores and ejaculates is dependent on their level. For example, level 10 males will store around 12 ml of semen in themselves, while level 30 males will store about 35 ml. Around half of their cum is released when they orgasm. Cum fully regenerates in around one in-game day.

Cum projectiles
Cum projectiles blast out and will splash and leave a decal where they land. The amount of projectiles fired from the penis is dependent on how big the load size is. So, lower level characters will blast less. These projectiles have new sound effects. Effects are courtesy Erstam's Cumshot, however they have been heavily tweaked for more volume and different angles. Can be disabled wit the below commands

Cum decals
Depending on load size, various textures will be applied to the character cummed onto. This system is advanced and supports multi-layering, so continually cumming will make the layers stack up. Additionally load size will determine the texture chosen. OCum has MORE cum texture variants than sexlab, and each variant can stack to make new patterns.

Female cum storage / the womb
Womb volume is randomly chosen and is between 20-50ml usually. Wombs are filled when a male performs a vaginal ejaculation in OStim, at which point cum milliliters are removed from the male and added to the female's womb. If a womb overflows, it will cause cum inflation. Cum drains out at a rate of about 0.5 ml per game world hour, double that if overflowing.

Cum inflation
A female's stomach will grow when her womb is full and she is overflowing. Max size is reached when the amount of cum in her body equals double her womb size
If you don't like cum inflation, don't worry. It's nearly impossible to unintentionally fill a character with enough cum to cause it, unless you are level 40+. Inflation requires multiple vaginal ejaculations in a short time span. Also can be disabled with the below commands

Squirting
Females have a roughly 1/4 chance to squirt when they orgasm. Visuals courtesy Erstam

Load size and visuals
The size of an ejaculation heavily influences the cum visuals you see. If a male has been orgasming frequently and is shooting blanks, you will see little to no effects. Likewise a very high level male character may be able to instantly cause cum inflation with a female partner and will drench them in cum and cumshots.

All NPCs including the player are tracked
All of OCum's effects and stats apply to everyone

Ultra-performance friendly
Despite tracking semen and womb-related stats for every single NPC across Skyrim, OCum is extremely performance friendly and uses a number of tricks so that it rarely has to run scripts. Script processing is done only during orgasm. No script cloaks or anything like it are used

FAQ / Issues
>Cum textures are not appearing for vaginal/anal sex
If your ejaculation size is small enough, no textures will appear. Use a higher level character and give them time to rest.

>How do I know exactly how big the cum loads are
Pop open the console when a character nuts and it will display it in ML. 3ml loads and below are small, 3-8 are medium, 8-16 are large, 16 and above are huge

>How long do cum decals stay?
About 5 minutes

>The cum decals look black?
If your skin texture is really light (fair skin complexion), the cum can blend in perfectly and look slightly black

>The cum inflation effect does not appear!
"You must have BodySlide, a body morph compatible body, and body morph compatible clothing/armors installed. Run BodySlide, select your body type, ensure that the "Build Morphs" checkbox is checked, and click the Batch Build button." - from the Fertility Mode page
Also, easily filling a womb will usually take either a moderately high level character or multiple characters back-to-back unless the female has a really small womb size.

>Does this work with SL? | Does this work with the FG animation system?
No, it only works with OStim

>Can the textures and sounds in this mod be swapped out?
Yes, simply replacing the .wav and .dds files in this mod will replace them in game. You are free to release texture and sound packs

>Which body is best for the textures?
Use CBBE to minimize texture seams

>Are futa characters supported?
Yes, all characters with a Schlongs of Skyrim schlong attached will be treated as male automatically. This can even be switched mid-game and the system will treat them as a different gender automatically.
If you don't have SoS installed, normal Skyrim gender settings are used.

>Characters are spazzing out when cumming?
Seems like the Flinch mod is activated by the cum shots, looking into a fix...

>Scene ends abruptly when I play as female and get hit by cum projectiles
Disable End If Attacked in OStim

Settings
A handful of features can be tweaked with the console commands below in 1.1+
>> set ocumdisablecumshot to 1
Disables cum projectiles

>> set ocumdisableinflation to 1
Disables inflation

>> set ocumregenmod to {multiplier}
changes the rate at which cum is regenerated by males. Default 1

Thanks & asset contributors
Thank you to Erstam for his work on Cumshot and letting me use it. Cumshot supports OStim already and has some extra features you should try, so check it out down below
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On Moira from overwatch
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what if i am?

also, let's see: i understand her appearance is not for everyone, but she has beautiful slender, slim and flexible body and if you're into that kind of shit (i'm not tho) a great ass

her abilities are beyond hot, just try to imagine her healing and succing (with her grasp) you at the same time, i don't even know what you can compare the feels with

she can cook and she likes to bake, and combined with her love for science and carelessness for ethics you can eat something weird any time you sit with her at the same table

and i don't even know if all of it matters after you hear her voice

one of the coolest things about that is Genevieve O'Reilly didn't even change her voice, this interview was year before her character release [https://youtu.be/xgP16IODXB8](https://youtu.be/xgP16IODXB8) and she sounds like moira, she looks similar to moira, she almost is moira

moira is a total package: smart, beautiful and unethical
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All Morbius movies
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Morbius (2022) Morbius 2: MoreBius (2024) Morbius 3 (2024) Morbius vs Blade (2025) Morbius vs the Marvel Cinematic Universe (2027) (morbius wins) Morbius vs the DC Extended Universe (2028) (morbius wins) Morbius 7: Morbius kills god (2029) Morbius 8: The Reckoning (2029) Morbius 9 (2030) Morbius X (2032) Morbius: The Series (2032-2189) Morbius XI: Morbin Time (2034) Morbius 12: Resurrection (2034) Morbius the Thirteenth (2036) Morbiverse of Madness (2037) Morbius 15: Morbius (2037) Morbius vs Jared Leto (2038) Morbius vs Kong (2038) Morbius vs Morbius (2039) Morbius 19 (2040) Morbius: 20th (Century) Morbius (2040) 21 Morbiuses (2041) Morbius: Across the Morbverse Part 1 (2041) Morbius: Across the Morbverse Part 2 (2042)Morbius: Across the Morbverse Part 3 (2043) Morbius 25: Morbidly Morbius (2043) Morbius vs Blade II (2044) Morbinity War (2045) Morbgame (2046) Morbius 29 (2047) Morbius vs Jared Leto II (2047) Son of Morbius (2048) Morbius 2049 (2049) The Morbengers (2050) Morb Man and the Morbius (2050) Captain Morbius (2050) Morbius 36 (2051) Morbius 37: The Morbtacular Morbius (2052) Morbius and Venom (2053) Morbius vs Venom (2053) Morbius Kills Venom (2053) Morbception (2054) Morbius 43: Morbius Gaming (2054) Morbius 44: Morbiuses Eleven (2055) Morbius: A New Morb (2056) Morbius: The Morbpire Strikes Back (2056) Morbius: Return of the Morbi (2057) Morbius 48 (2058) Morbius: Morbius (2058) Morbius 50 (2059) Morbius: The Phantom Morbius (2060) Morbius: Attack of the Morbs (2061) Morbius: Revenge of the Morb (2061) Morbius 54: Morbzilla (2062) Morbius: Little House on the Morbrie (2063) Morbius: The Morb Awakens (2064) Morbius: The Last Morb (2064) Morbius: The Rise of Morbius (2065) Morbius: Beyond (2066) Morbius: Into Morbness (2067) Morbius 62 (2068) Morbius and the Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent (2069) Fantastic Morbius (2070) The Morbman (2070) The Morbius (2071) Breaking Morbius (2071) Better Call Morbius (2071)
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Markiplier
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Hello everybody. My name is Markiplier and welcome to Five Nights at Freddy’s, an indie horror game that you guys suggested in mass and I saw that Yamimash played it and he said it was really, really good. So I’m very eager to see what is up. And that is a very terrifying animatronic bear. A family pizzeria looking for a security guard to work the night shift. 12 AM the first night. If I didn’t wanna stay the first night, why would I stay anymore than five? Why would I stay anymore than two? Hello.
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Bussy has changed ( OC)
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Bussy has changed. It's no longer about butt seggs, cuddles, or femboys. It's an endless series of proxy bussies bred by mercenaries and machines. Bussy - and its consumption of life - has become a well-oiled machine. Bussy has changed. Choker-tagged soldiers carry choker-tagged weapons, use choker-tagged gear. Cum inside their bodies enhance and regulate their abilities. Genetic control. Information control. Emotion control. Bedroom control. Everything is monitored and kept under control. Bussy has changed. The age of Bussy has become the age of control... All in the name of averting straight seggs from bussies of mass destruction. And he who controls the Bussy... controls history. bussy has changed. When the Bussy is under total control... Bussy becomes routine.
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I fucking hate twitch emotes.
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I fucking hate twitch emotes. They're so fucking ugly. They're just a bunch of stupid looking faces that look like they're trying too hard to be funny. I hate how they're always used in such a spammy way, and I hate how they're always used in place of actual words. I hate how people are always trying to one-up each other with them, and I hate how they're always trying to be the center of attention. I hate how they're always trying to be edgy, and I hate how they're always trying to be cute. I hate how they're always trying to be something they're not, and I hate how they're always trying to be something they are. I fucking hate twitch emotes. I can't reiterate this enough. It's bad enough that irl people are making these stupid faces, but now we have to see them online too? Just kill me now. Honestly, just kill me. I can't take it anymore. Twitch emotes are the worst thing to happen to the internet, and I hope they die a painful death. What purpose do Twitch emotes even serve? They don't add anything to the conversation, they're just there to be spammed and to make people look stupid. I fucking hate Twitch emotes, and I will never use them. I will never type "Kappa" or "PogChamp" or any of that bullshit. I will never put one of those stupid faces in my chat, and I will never type "lol" in all caps. I fucking hate Twitch emotes, and I wish they would just disappear.
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I want to throatfuck plankton while pleasuring sandy by letting her cock devour me.
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I want to throatfuck plankton while pleasuring sandy by letting her cock devour me. I will plead for mercy and she will eventually let me out, but now i am covered in sandy's brown semen. Then i will prepare to rail spongebob over his desk. when im finished with him i want to drown in mr crabs thighs. next i will brutally rape and abuse patrick taping it and uploading it to pornhub with the title, "obese rough fuck with a starfish". next i will suck on squidward's foot fungus infested toes. afterwards i will show my reverence for sandy begging her to not devour me with her massive cock vore. i am her slave. she forces me to suck and nibble on her balls and titties. she does not find it satsifactory, thus she makes me enter doggy position, proceeding to fuck the shit out of my anus, voring the insides out of me. then she fills the dead sack of skin that is my body with her brown squirrell cum. she drowns plankton, patrick, spongebob and squidward in the spunk filled sack of skin. then she procceds to vore the bodys and cum back in in order to produce breast milk. sandy mates with mr crabs and after birth brutally uses him as an objectified fucktoy. now sandy vores in mr crabs and continues to make more breast milk for her cock voring offspring.
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I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today
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I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today, I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine signaling my impending, earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen EVERYONE in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever had, or ever will produce shot out SO HARD that my dick was ripped apart by my Übernut, accelerating to 5% of the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, it barely slowed before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear powered angle grinder. the sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of illinois became pregnant with my children.
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tunneling electron microscope facebook roast
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VICE, at Cornell University they have an incredible piece of scientific equipment known as the Tunneling Electron Microscope. Now, this microscope is so powerful that by firing electrons you can actually see images of the atom, the infinitesimally minute building blocks of our universe. If I were using that microscope right now, I still wouldn't be able to locate my interest in your problem.
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Maybe he just didn't like the butter chicken hot dog
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I bought this one guy a butter chicken hot dog and he took one bite of it and threw it out as he said it tasted bad. This is obviously a racist act showing his disdain for Indians and other people of brown descent due to his European heritage and belief of European ascendency and eugenics. Additionally, it is greatly offensive to Africans as well due to that food being potentially capable of feeding several starving children.
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Serious NoFap Post But I Replaced Fapping With Watching Morbius (NOrbius)
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# 5 Months - Going Strong

Today marks day 151 (exactly 5 months) since I last watched Morbius. My best streak prior to this was 1 month a little over a year ago. I wanted to share a few things that I have learned along the way that should be helpful for others.

1. You need to hold yourself accountable and take responsibility for your own healing. Something that drives me crazy about this community sometimes is the amount of people who post things like "Jared Leto made me relapse." No, the only thing that made you relapse is your own decision to relapse. Seeing a Jared Leto looking girl/guy at the gym didn't make you relapse; your decision did. Seeing someone post a picture of themselves with a vampire filter didn't make you relapse; your decision did. The only thing that these things do is trigger and influence you, but your actions are ultimately up to you. Until you accept that you and you ALONE are responsible for your actions, you won't have a chance at overcoming this.
2. Now, going off of the previous one, you still have a choice as to how frequently you allow yourself to be around tempting things. Be REALLY careful and deliberate about what content and media you consume. If you are a gamer, for example, be aware that most of the gaming industry (especially J-RPGs and fantasy games) has a lot of vampires. A lot of movies, TV shows, and anime show them too. Also be aware that there's a lot of media out there that, while not explicitly being a reference to Morbius, will actively normalize the idea of watching it. Frequently exposing yourself to content that includes this stuff will lead to you being triggered much more frequently, and much more likely to relapse.
3. Be REALLY careful and deliberate about who you are spending time with in person, messaging, and following on social media. If you are spending time with a lot of people who actively display Morbius around others or are constantly posting Morbius content, or constantly dress morbiusly, this will trigger you. While you can't control how they act/post/dress/etc, you CAN control how often you are exposed to them. Plus, they will influence your perceptions of what is normal. For example, there are a lot of people who will tell you lies like "abstaining from Morbius is unhealthy." The more you are exposed to these lies, the more likely you are to believe them and relapse.
4. Spend a little bit of time educating yourself on the psychological impacts of Morbius, and some of the really disgusting realities of the movie industry. Books like "Your Brain on Morbius" by Daniel Espinosa is really helpful. It's one thing to think that Morbius is bad for you. But it is another thing entirely to know WHY it is bad. The more you know about the negative side-effects, the easier it is to avoid partaking in it.
5. Use your environment to help keep you accountable. If you have any Jared Leto posters, magazines, toys, etc. lying around that either remind you of or make it easier to participate in morbius behavior, GET RID OF THEM. Spend less time in cinemas. Go outside more often. You can't control when temptations come, but you CAN create an environment in which they are less frequent and harder to act on.
6. Work on convincing yourself that life is NOT primarily about finding pleasure, having fun, and being happy. While it is important to be able to experience these things, they are not the primary purpose or goal of life. It is important to recognize, however, that if you believe they ARE the primary purpose and goal of life, resisting Morbius is far more difficult than it would be otherwise. How one arrives at the point where their core values are about greater things is different for everyone. But if you want to find success with NOrbius, you MUST find things that you value more than instant-gratification and pleasure.
7. To go with the previous point about core values, you need to have a strong WHY. You can't just say "I want to quit Morbius because my friend told me to" or "I want to get super powers" or "It seems interesting" and expect to be successful with it. Those aren't strong reasons. Really start working on figuring out a strong, captivating WHY for yourself.
8. Before you feel triggered and have urges, have a plan for what you will do. Then, when you are triggered and have urges, actually follow the plan. What this looks like is different for everyone. Maybe you go for a quick jog when you have urges. Maybe you take a cold shower. Maybe you do something in line with your spiritual beliefs. Maybe you go for a drive. Whatever you do, make sure that when you feel triggered, you do something healthy to get your mind off of it. One of the WORST things you can do when you feel triggered is to just sit and do nothing or go to the cinema.

Gotta go, but those are just some things I'd say are really important to keep in mind.

r/NOrbius
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morbius :>
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i fuсking LОVЕ mоrbius hоly shit i wаnt tо fuсk his tight аsshоle untill it stаrts blееding hоly shit i wаnt tо fuсk his tight swеаty hеmоrrhоid fillеd аsshоle and shооt the biggest lоаd of сum up his аsshоle so hard and deep that it makes him сum harder and longer while yelling ITS MОRBIN TIMЕ! oh my goodness gracious it would feel so good with his morbussy squeezing tighter and tighter while i go deeper and deeper, as his morbussy squeezes tighter and tighter and i go harder and harder, shоoting my load deeper and deeper while having the ultimate pleasure ever, while morbiggа becomes the hottest сum dump ever, think about my chocies and finnaly eat his cоrpse.

I've become legend while you ( @jaredleto#6830 ) have fallen, I shall ascend to vallhalla and feast and drink till the end of time. Best regards Croissant.

Remember me fellow morbius enjoyers, I shall now head for valhalla and await you my brothers there.

My fellow morbius enjoyers, valhalla awaits, jaredleto#6830 for you my friend the deepest pits of hel wait for you.
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I'm not transphobic but they all hate me for some reason
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I'm not transphobic, but I saw this trans person (they had the thigh high socks and trans flag shirt) vomit up a smaller albino version of themselves. When I asked how they did that they let out a high frequency shreek and shoot blood out their left eye. I think I've been marked or something now, because now every non binary non cis person I know is hostile towards me. They see me and then a blue light shoots out of there mouth and they start yelling at me in tongues.

Please get off my lawn there are 20 of them now just standing there motionless. The blinds are drawn but I can still feel them looking at me. I'm scared. I called the police but now they joined them in staring at my house. Some of these statues are pre-op, post-op, femboys, tomgirls, and one has really long arms that reach the ground. I'm afraid for my life. I cant leave my house and I'm running low on food. My printer goes off even though it's not connected to anything. It just prints out demands for thigh high socks and hormones.

I get phone calls from loved ones. Sometimes they are concerned, but occasionally they act like nothing is wrong. They don't act natural, like someone else is in the room with them. They tell me that the convergence is soon and I am powerless to stop it. Whenever I open up r/196 (i frequent alot) a slimmy substance pours out of my phone's charger port. It burns to the touch. I am not a religious man, but if there is a god he has abandoned me.

I have nothing against Trans people or gay people or whatever, but you all keep throwing rocks at my house and assulting me in public and throwing acid in my face and it's just really annoying. sorry to nitpick but someone needs to address these issues.

(please read this entirely before commenting)
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Saw in MHA Manga comment section
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mister wayse walks into the room hurriedly, He takes out the gun and points it at his brother, his friend behind him not knowing his intention asked, shockingly "what are you doing?!
"THEY KILLED MY WIFE!?!"
he angruily screams on the verge of going crazy, with silence as his reply, his brother answered
"...its for the plot brother" he mocked in his slow chilling voice
wayse is taken a back, he clenches his teeth
"then is this for the plot too brother!?!?" he threatens with the gun held accurately at his brother
his brother grinned teasingly
"it can be" he said with a darkness in his voice "...thats your choice"
wayse hesitantly loses his control, with the last of his anger, he pulled the trigger
"...fuck the plot..." he whispered painfully "...it didnt have to be my wife....the only reason im alive...."
"is for her"
the end
that was the last scene, and all i can say is
UWAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WHY MY WAIFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
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I'm not transphobic, but- Seizure Warning
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​

I'm not transphobic, but I saw this trans person (they had the thigh high socks and trans flag shirt) vomit up a smaller albino version of themselves. When I asked how they did that they let out a high frequency shreek and shoot blood out their left eye. I think I've been marked or something now, because now every non binary non cis person I know is hostile towards me. They see me and then a blue light shoots out of there mouth and they start yelling at me in tongues.

​

Please get off my lawn there are 20 of them now just standing there motionless. The blinds are drawn but I can still feel them looking at me. I'm scared. I called the police but now they joined them in staring at my house. Some of these statues are pre-op, post-op, femboys, tomgirls, and one has really long arms that reach the ground. I'm afraid for my life. I cant leave my house and I'm running low on food. My printer goes off even though it's not connected to anything. It just prints out demands for thigh high socks and hormones.

​

I get phone calls from loved ones. Sometimes they are concerned, but occasionally they act like nothing is wrong. They don't act natural, like someone else is in the room with them. They tell me that the convergence is soon and I am powerless to stop it. Whenever I open up r/196 (i frequent alot) a slimmy substance pours out of my phone's charger port. It burns to the touch. I am not a religious man, but if there is a god he has abandoned me.

​

I have nothing against Trans people or gay people or whatever, but you all keep throwing rocks at my house and assulting me in public and throwing acid in my face and it's just really annoying. sorry to nitpick but someone needs to address these issues.

​

(please read this entirely before commenting)
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Found on an emo comment thread
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is it me or does minimum wage bussy hit different? the stress of having student loans makes them so tight. i'm bored of my whole foods, globe trotting boyfriend. all that easy living has him way too relaxed if you know what i mean? i'll drive an hour just to see the bossy starbucks barista power bottom just so I can hit it in his honda civic. they're the best mistresses, simple creatures. they're happy with just going to chili's and coldstone too. unlike my current LeLabo scented bottom with his stress-free, lasered bootyhole asking me to take him to michelin star restaurants so i can MAYBE get romantic, vanilla butt sex and then gets mad at me for getting the squirties on our egyptian cotton Frette sheets man who cares? i'm just trying to fuhq
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I’m so glad my wife and I decided against abortion
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I’m so glad my wife and I decided against abortion. In the end, our baby ended up being a shiny!! Apparently it’s really rare but it has completely different skin color than me which is like super lucky
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Doug Walker / Nostalgia Critic reaction gif, but it's just emojis
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😯

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🤓
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McDonalds India Order
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2 McVeggies

1 Small coke (Milkshake if im feeling cute)

1 Pizza Pocket

1 medium fry
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