unmmmm ehy am i the only alt in my school 😭😭 like i might get HATE CRIMED for being alt 😕🙏 like everyone is so straight in my school 🙄🙄🙄😹 ok yes TECHNICALLY i am straight but like im BASICALLY part of lgbtq community at this point- anyways KAM except trans men uwu ;-; their my little smol beans beans 🥺😊 purr chile anyways bestie finna and i oop bussin bussin period sksksk slayyy ASFF 😋☠️

Source: https://old.reddit.com/qad1j2

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⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻ ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ 在著我們面前，冇逃避，中華人民共咊囯嘅輝煌。 MESSAGE FROM THE MINISTRY OF STATE

📮✊😦🤚‼️ -9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 social credits! ❗️❓👀👄👀 💢

🙀 Execution date🥴

1 0/ 1 8/ 2 0 2 1

Nooooooooooooooooooooooo

⠟⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⢻⣿ ⡆⠊⠈⣿⢿⡟⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣎⠈⠻ ⣷⣠⠁⢀⠰⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠛⠛⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⢹⣿⡑⠐⢰ ⣿⣿⠀⠁⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⡩⠐⠀⠀⠀⠀⢐⠠⠈⠊⣿⣿⣿⡇⠘⠁⢀⠆⢀ ⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⢤⣿⣿⡿⠃⠈⠀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣇⡆⠀⠀⣠⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⣦⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠐⣿⣿⣷⣦⣷⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⣾⣿⣿⠋⠁⠀⠉⠻⣿⣿⣧⠀⠠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⠀⣺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣠⣂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣁⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣄⣤⣤⣔⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

Source: https://old.reddit.com/qabquv

Usually I (42m) see my son (12m) on the couch in the living room playing minecraft with his (12m) friends 'xXxmomfucker69xXx' and 'UwUfurryfemboy'. Usually I (40m) have no problem with that, he's (12m) having a good time playing with good friends. But yesterday I (42m) saw him playing f*rtnite instead, which is bad unwholesome chugus so I did what I (41m) thought was the best course of action, which was punching him (12f) in the face as hard as I (41m) could. It was for his (12f) own good.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/q9ywmh

Have you ever been to Earth? On Earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain: You’re an idiot. Let me further explain: Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layers lengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern. Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY. When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito. And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what: Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND. Nope. Nope. My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND ME FOR A FEW MINUTES UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET. You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers. And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE. What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN. I just want a burrito. In conclusion: You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys. UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”: A fucking fork? I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD. If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER. That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL. Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS. A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now. People eat burritos with forks? God is sorry he made us.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/qaacin

I'm tired to all the hysteria! COVID isn't that bad. I caught it three times, on purpose, and I still have both my lungs and most my dignity. I'm fine. I've had worse flu viruses before. They're just pushing some agenda, and for what reason? I can't be sure but there's a reason.

Look, some people die. That's life. If they were too weak to fight off a lame virus like COVID then they were probably not gonna live long anyway. Survival of the fittest. It's the same reason I don't bat an eye when children die of cancer. Sorry parents, but your kid was just genetically inferior.

We don't need weak human specimens flooding the gene pool anyway. If you're too weak to survive COVID then you don't deserve to have your genes spread around. It's bad for the human race.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/qa89hc

I just want a cute little femboy to please all my sexual needs, I would smash his boy pussy whusy and he would be like "Nwooo you boy cwant jwust boy cum in my boy pwussie sussie boy whussie", then I would be all like "YEEEEEEAH😎😎😎😎", then, when we are doing 69 (funny number big chungus), he would fart in my face accidentally, but then it wouldn't be just a boy fart ("bart", for the man of culture r/culture), it would be straight up shit, and I would happily eat all of it, and he would be like "What the fuck? Why are you eating my shit?", that question wouldn't be a wholesome 100 keanu reeves everyone liked that big chungus moment, then I would slap his butt as hard as I can and say "EMERGENCY MEETING, THERE'S AN IMPOSTOR AMANG US" and then he would say "Are you autistic?", then I would say "I KNOW WHO THE IMPASTER IS... MY PISS" and then I would eject my piss into his boy sussy whushy clushy amangus pussy, and it would be a real r/epic big chungy chungus chunguilus moment

Source: https://old.reddit.com/qa70nf

Guys help something is going on with my son. So I(41M) have been having a lot of trouble with my son recently. It started out 3 months ago he would start randomly and loudly moaning during eating, he also often started rubbing and smearing the food on him. Then he also started randomly crying during eating. He also would masturbate and cum during eating and he also started going through my wife's (38F) and mine (41M) drawer and cumming in our underwear. Now this would all be normal after all he's a teenage boy and I did the same thing when I was his age. However what made me really caucious was when he started shitting in his hand and smearing it against him and when he would add the shit into his potato porridge and he would eat the whole thing. So I(41M) went looking around his room and wanted to look in his laptop to maybe find what was causing his strange behavior. I open a file titled as "Porn" and find numerous "Nikocado Avocado Fart Compilation" videos. Unfortunately I hear him coming back so I didn't want to be caught by him so I hide in the locker. Then I watch as he sits down and starts watching one of the videos and starts loudly moaning and masturbating and cumming while he is smearing against his body a yoghurt he brought for eating. I was extremely disgusted by this so I got out of the locker thinking I have to go to the toilet to vomit, however I didn't make it in time to the toilet and vomited all over his locker and room and ran out of his room. Now I am sitting here wondering how can I help my son, guys if any of you have any idea what to do please send help.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/qa66wp

Oh my fucking god what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck roll my grandma in the hole hit my mama in the ear with a turkey wing slap my little niece with a vienna sausage what the fuck what the fuck

Source: https://old.reddit.com/qa58vv

I was thinking about why so many in the radical left participate in "speedrunning" The reason is the left's lack of work ethic ('go fast' rather than 'do it right') and, in a Petersonian sense, to elevate alternative sexual archetypes in the marketplace ('fastest mario')

Obviously, there are exceptions to this and some people more in the center or right also "speedrun". However, they more than sufficient to prove the rule, rather than contrast it. Consider how woke GDQ has been, almost since the very beginning. Your eyes will start to open.

Returning to the topic of the work ethic... A "speedrunner" may well spend hours a day at their craft, but this is ultimately a meaningless exercise, since they will ultimately accomplish exactly that which is done in less collective time by a casual player.

This is thus a waste of effort on the behalf of the "speedrunner". Put more simply, they are spending their work effort on something that someone else has already done (and done in a way deemed 'correct' by the creator of the artwork). Why do they do this?

The answer is quite obvious if you think about it. The goal is the illusion of speed and the desire (SUBCONSCIOUS) to promote radical leftist, borderline Communist ideals of how easy work is. Everyone always says that "speedruns" look easy. That is part of the aesthetic.

Think about the phrase "fully automated luxury Communism" in the context of "speedrunning" and I strongly suspect that things will start to 'click' in your mind.

What happens to the individual in this? Individual accomplishment in "speedrunning" is simply waiting for another person to steal your techniques in order to defeat you. Where is something like "intellectual property" or "patent" in this necessarily communitarian process?

ow, as to the sexual archetype model and 'speedrunning' generally... If you have any passing familiarity with Jordan Peterson's broader oeuvre and of Jungian psychology, you likely already know where I am going with this. However, I will say more for the uninitiated.

Keep this passage from Maps of Meaning (91) in mind: "The Archetypal Son... continually reconstructs defined territory, as a consequence of the 'assimilation' of the unknown \[as a consequence of 'incestuous' (that is, 'sexual' – read creative) union with the Great Mother\]"

In other words, there is a connection between 'sexuality' and creativity that we see throughout time (as Peterson points out with Tiamat and other examples). In the sexual marketplace, which archetypes are simultaneously deemed the most creative and valued the highest?

The answer is obviously entrepreneurs like Elon Musk and others. Given that we evolved and each thing we do must have an evolutionary purpose (OR CAUSE), what archetype is the 'speedrunner' engaged in, who is accomplishing nothing new?

They are aiming to make a new sexual archetype, based upon 'speed' rather than 'doing things right' and refuse ownership of what few innovations they can provide to their own scene, denying creativity within their very own sexual archetype. This is necessarily leftist.

The obvious protest to this would be the 'glitchless 100% run', which in many ways does aim to play the game 'as intended' but seems to simply add the element of 'speed' to the equation.

This objection is ultimately meaningless when one considers how long a game is intended to be played, in net, by the creators, even when under '100%' conditions. There is still time and effort wasted for no reason other than the ones I proposed above.

By now, I am sure that I have bothered a number of you and rustled quite a few of your feathers. I am not saying that 'speedrunning' is bad, but rather that, thinking about the topic philosophically, there are dangerous elements within it. That is all.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/qa3lna

Okay, but let’s say, hypothetically, that I wanted to take a shit on Margaret Thatcher’s grave. I mean like we’re talking a big ol’ log. A real nasty behemoth. A brown-and-green sticky pile of the worst thing that can come out of a human being, if you will. Perhaps a fat fucking monster full of juicy slime. In theory, a smelly corpse home to a variety of maggots. My wife (who is a doctor, by the way) reckons this gruesome turd would contain enough acidic liquids from the tacos on Thursday for it to melt right into Thatcher’s rotting flesh.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/qa3ecf

Alright, so here’s the dealio.

I have a large Italian family with many cousins, uncles, aunts, nephews, et cetera. Every once in awhile we’ll all gather up to celebrate the anniversary of our great grandparents’ wedding, a special occasion marking the creation of our family. They’re long gone now, but it’s the memory that counts, and we celebrate by cooking a feast for the ages, rivaling thanksgiving dinner.

Now upon the eve of this anniversary all “da boys” (as us men in the family affectionately call ourselves) gather up and go to a famous local bar in downtown Boston. They only accept cash, very “old school” feel to the place, but it makes for some great stories. Usually the place is a blast, with all sorts of banter and drunken shenanigans occurring, but not last night...

Now before I divulge the details, I ought to give some background as to how I fit into this family. Where my father and I are well integrated into the family, my mother is quite the outsider. She comes from wealthier, southern origins, around the mid-Atlantic part of the country. Because of this, she’s always viewed the family as “working class”, with her posh accent sticking out like a sore thumb at gatherings of Bostonians. By extension, I’ve always felt I had to prove to my family that I can “hang” with them so to speak, and in a way I worry that they see my mom as the woman who pulled my dad away from their tight knit circle.

Now let’s cut back to last night at the bar. Laughs, drinks, and stories all around the bar as we enjoy ourselves. My cousin Vinny invites me and some of the younger guys to play truth or drink. At this point I’m already quite drunk, but accept for the fun of it. A few questions in and Vinny asks me “how big is your dick? I know you’re packing a huge one Anon, right?”

Of course my other cousins all groan with embarrassment, but I foolishly answer instantly, unaware of the ramifications of my response.

“4.5 inches” I say too confidently, and suddenly all eyes are on me.

“Drink anon, I know you’re bullshitting me man!” says Vinny, with a twinge of nervous angst in his voice.

“I’m serious Vin, that’s all I got, haha”

Dead silence. I gaze across the bar to see my entire family looking in shock and awe at my response. Vinny attempts to get everyone focused back on the game, and everyone resumes at a quieter tempo, but I knew that I had just majorly fucked up.
After leaving the bar, my uncle Paul pulls me aside, puts both hands on my shoulder and says “Kid, please tell me you’re just fucking around about your cock size”

“No paul, Jesus what the fuck is your problem?” I say indignantly

“Anon, don’t you know everyone in this family is packing fat schlong? For Christ sakes I’m on the smaller side and still clock out around 7 inches.”

“So what? Why the hell does penis size matter to you so much?” I’m starting to get worried at this point, I’ve never seen Paul look at me with such intensity.
“Matter to me? It’s matters to the whole damn family! Cock size is more than a number, it quantifies your entire personality. You can’t call yourself a member of this family if your walking around with a fucking baby carrot between your legs”

Paul went on explaining the history of this family, and how the men found success through leveraging their superior cocks, both literally and figuratively. According to him, my dad was somewhat of a legend, with a massive 10 inch meat cannon.

Apparently during a final 200 meter dash in highschool, my father won by enlarging his penis so much and preformed a pelvic to win the race. I always felt like I never lived up to my father’s athletic record, but now I know that I come short in more ways than one.

So how could my dad’s cock be so big, and mine be so small? I had to investigate.

It turns that penis endowment correlates with genes on both the X and Y chromosomes, meaning that both my mother and father’s genetics are responsible. My father’s side obviously is known for their legendary sausages, so I knew I had to speak with my mother.

She was incredibly reluctant to describe her male family members’ genitalia to me for some reason... odd. I knew I had to investigate further, so I called some of my cousins and uncles from that side. Turns out, the family has relatively average penis sizes, but all larger than mine. Combined they averaged about 6 inches.
Here’s what makes no sense, if my dad’s side has an average of 8 inches, and my mom’s side has an average of 6 inches, why don’t I fall within that range? I suspected my mother’s hesitancy to speak on the matter indicated a darker secret, so I went digging.

My mom was friends with a man she knew from law school named Brian, and I always suspected she might have had a thing for him. I reach out to talk, and he gladly accepts.

Over the phone, I ask him “So how big is your cock?”

“My cock? Ahh, unfortunately I was born with a rather small 3 inch cock, but it gets the job done. It’s about average in my family”

Bingo, what lies in between 3 and 6? 4.5. Brian was my father. But before I had a chance to ask him, the phone line disconnected.

My father stands across from me, holding the phone cord in his hand. He had been on the other line, and must have figured it out.

“I always knew...” he said with a solemn look in his eye. He sulked away and retreated to his room, feeling unworthy to face the rest of the family.

I realize now that I needed to at least make amends with my cousins, they might not be able to respect my cock on size, but maybe I could demonstrate the skill and speed of my cock.

The dinner party was about to start, my mother and father had clearly been arguing and didn’t show up. Nobody bothered to look at me, and when they did catch my eyes I only saw disdain.

I realized now was the chance, and stood up on the table.

“I challenge anybody who’s man enough to a sword fight!” I declared, whipping my smaller cock out into the air for everyone to see.

At first I was met with silence, but then Vinny steps up, with rage in his eyes...
“Tough talk for a fella with a small cock”
He joined me on the table, summoning is terrifying 9 inch meat penetrator. I quickly assumed a guard position, I was 5 inches short from a fair fight, so I had to play defensively.

He charged with his penis in hand, swinging wildly, but clearly underestimating my maneuverability. I dodged and landed 3 quick jabs with the tip of my peen on his shaft. He reposted quickly, but I chambered his advanced and managed to strike at the balls. Vinny was down, but soon the rest of the family whipped out their cocks and prepared to engage in an all out melee.

The smell of musty dicks filled the air as men took their sides on the battlefield. Some came to defend me, admiring my valor in single combat with Vinny, while others came to avenge him. Soon a frontline emerged, reminiscent of the pike-and-shot warfare of the early modern period. Men on the front pushed and pulled with their cocks to make ground, while occasionally allowing for volleys of cum to fly across the room as artillery.

The battle was intense, casualties began to stack up, and it looked like my side was going to collapse.

Then my father came downstairs, 10 inch cock in hand.

“You may not be my son, anon, but you’ll always be my boy”

He and my allies charged, rallying our fallen comrades. I’d never seen a man cockfight like my father before. He used his massive schlong like a zweihander, cutting down two, three cocks at once.
Soon the battle ended, with Vinny’s allies surrendering in defeat. The room was covered in ball sweat and cum, dripping from the walls and ceiling.

I don’t know where I stand with the family currently. Many have learned to accept me, but I’m sure it will take years before the rest consider it. Who knows how many more wars this family will fight before peace is had... and it’s all my fault.

TL;DR: I revealed my cock length to my family, which escalated into a massive war.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/qa0qz7

My husband and I have been together for 15 years. Through those years our sex life has survived stress with jobs, money, and two kids. We had an active healthy sex life. For the last month my husband has been hyper focused on playing this Roblox game. It’s an obvious obsession and he plays till 1am. Meanwhile I’m left alone to do everything. Including take care of any sexual needs I have. By the time he comes to bed I’m too tired or asleep. I have a full time job and two kids that I take care of while he does absolutely nothing but work and play Roblox. I’ve had numerous discussions with him. I’ve tried to seduce him to tempt him and I’m just constantly shut down. It’s really hurting my self esteem and makes me feel completely depressed.

The worst part is I feel like he doesn’t even realize or see how the rejection and lack of intimacy is affecting me. I feel so isolated and alone. I don’t feel loved or anything by him. I’m afraid our relationship is slowly transforming from a marriage to a roommate situation. I’m lost and helpless and tired of asking him to give me some type of love aside from occasional kisses and cuddles.

How can a game really be the demise of my 15 year marriage?? Is this something deeper? I’m the only one putting any effort into us now.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/qa0kfe

Vegeta: I NEED Cock goku.
ChiChi: Stop training and come home😡
Caulifa: I NEED Cock goku.
Piccolo: I NEED Cock goku.
Mr. Popo: I NEED Cock goku.
Supreme Kai: I NEED Cock goku.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/q9yqag

ofc we have feelings but we are not like you girls cry everywhere you want to we have to hide our pains and even the worlds sais boys should not cry but im tired of this shit if a girl falls down everyone comes and helps her but when a boy falls everyone luaghs no one cares these years are changing ​ btw i knwo this is not about that its about ali dieng yeah but the truth had to be rvealed if anyone dosnt agrees with me its fine i dont care anymore

Source: https://old.reddit.com/q9yaan

I don't get the joke can someone explain the joke please. I don't understand what the fuck is supposed to be funny about this "meme". You all understand porn websites exist? Why are you all so brain dead that as soon you see anything that resembles a woman you upvote?

Source: https://old.reddit.com/q9wx8x

Imagine reading a reddit post, but over the course of it the quality seems to deteriorate and it gets wose an wose, where the swentence stwucture and gwammer rewerts to a pwoint of uttew non swence, an u jus dont wanna wead it anywore (○｀ 3′○) awd twa wol owdewl iws jus awful ( •̀ ω •́ )y bwt tw powost iwswnwt obwer nyet, it gwos own an own an own an own, uwu wanyaa stwop weadwing bwut uwu cwant stop wewding, uwu stwartd thwis awnd ur gwoing two fwinibsh it nowo mwattew wat! uwu hab mwoxie kwiddowo, bwut uwu wibl gwib ub sowon, i cwan wite wike dis fwor owowrs, swo dwont cwalenge mii........

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wbats dis??? uwu awe stwill weedinb mwie powst?? uwu habe awot ob detewemwinyanyation!! (✿◕‿◕✿)u habve comopweedid tha pwost, gud job!

Source: https://old.reddit.com/q9wxj1

Viper from Titanfall 2 ruined my marriage.


Hello [social media of choice], Viper from Titanfall 2 ruined my marriage. My wife said she was going out with her friends, so her boyfriend let me play my favourite game, Titanfall 2. I went and booted up my PC and there he was, the king himself, Viper. My body tingles with excitement as I drag the mouse across the screen. I finally open up the game and see all of my achievements. 9k hours and I still cant get enough of Viper’s sexy voice. As I’m about to select the Viper boss fight, my dumb son enters the room and starts crying because my wife’s boyfriend was hitting him. "Shut up,” I tell him. He starts crying louder as he leaves the room. The mission starts. As I press space, I feel like I just used the stim. My heart starts beating louder, I no longer feel tired, as I know whats about to happen. After defeating the stupid grunts, I finally see BT-7274 destroy the cockpit window and gently pick me up. He takes a few graceful steps, and then I saw him. Viper. His voice makes my inner body tingle. "Voodoo 1, Viper’s on station. Your journey ends here pilot, nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. The skies belong to me.” I let out a slight moan as I hear his soothing voice. As I start the fight, I hear "Fox-ten, I got good tone.” I know whats about to happen. I let his load of rockets hit me just so I can hear my favourite voiceline, "Hear that ringing in your ear, son.” As he gracefully dodges my shots I finally beat him. "I've lost control, I've lost control," he says. It fills me with anger towards myself. How could I let this happen? As BT-7274 prepares for fast ball, he comes back. Viper loses his hatch. “Aim for the cockpit," BT says. I know what I have to do, but I don't know if I can do it. Tears start forming in to my eyes as I begin moving towards his Northstar. With every shot I take, I am filled with regret and pain. I start to cry loudly. Tears are falling down my cheeks. Suddenly my wife barges in, and tells me that she wants a divorce. I gladly accept, as I know I can no longer love her, because Viper is my true soulmate. She and her boyfriend go up to bed, while I go into the basement to take my stuff and and my Viper body pillow. Tommorow I am supposed to go finish signing the divorce files. So, [social media of choice], this is how Viper ruined my marriage.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/q9vpmq

Giant boobs, I mean really big huge boobs, a real set of mommies, some really huge mommies, one great pair of super mega ultra big tits, gigantic extra beautiful big tits, really a great set of juicy beautiful massive boobs, mythical super pair of big tits.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/q9utcn

Women of reddit(18F) , what is the most sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual

Thing you have ever done to an antisocial 36 year old man living with his parents and spends 16 hours a day browsing reddit?

Source: https://old.reddit.com/q9u3xi

Hello I am a M 68 living in North Korea I(M68) have been struggling with weight issues since I was M 69 so I have decided to go to the gym around every Thursday. So basically on my second time there I see this hot woman (F19) and I thought she was quite hot normal right? So on my(M70) fourth day going there I couldn't hold it anymore and instantly cummed on her ass after I grabbed it. Than the people around and her started to call the police?? so I was obviously very confused as what they are doing because I did nothing wrong. so I told them they were assholes and were very dumb. but the problem is the police came to my door and said something about sexual assault. this made me think AITA???

edit: definitely not the asshole thanks for the support guys but they sent me to jail what a bunch of poop beans.

Source: https://old.reddit.com/q9tos7